Chapter 8.13 - Act 8: Lively 13 (1/2)
Act 8: Lively 13
Thinking back, I think it was quite difficult to choose the second song and it was in fact easier choosing the first song, Elf King.
Elf King was something that could only be done by myself – it was the type of song which even the genius of the century Kim Wuju as well as the prideful Lee Suh-ah weren’t able to do as of yet.
It was a song choice dedicated to make the most out of the sword style changes.
After choosing the first song like that, I had to choose the second prac song, but my head turned blank like I had been smacked by a rock.
Should I show off high notes?
No, Kim Wuju would be able to make notes higher and better than mine.
Should I show off techniques?
No, Kim Wuju would be able to display better techniques.
Kim Wuju’s La Danza. Just from that one song which I heard during the study group, I felt like I was being blinded.
Even teacher Ku Mingi told me to just choose a song I was confident with for the second song, perhaps because he couldn’t think of any special moves either.
That was the huge gap existing between Kim Wuju and myself – a gap which could never be overcome just because I had been singing for longer.
‘A song I was confident with.’
Closing my eyes, I listened to the accompaniment flowing out of the piano and smiled.
That was why, choosing the second song was easy yet difficult.
When my goal was to come out on top, my head was blank without anything popping up, but when I decided to just try my best, there were too many songs I wanted to sing.
I used to sing this and that song a lot. Ah, this song is super good as well…
The songs I had been singing for the past 20 years flashed past my head – the songs I sang as a run-of-the-mill baritone of Korea; as the disciple of teacher Kwak Jungsoo, Jo Yunjae.
I picked one from those.
A song I was the most confident in, and one that had been polished diligently throughout 20 years.
‘Baritone Jo Yunjae’.
It was a song representing him.
Slowly, I opened my eyes as well as my lips.
“É triste il mio cuor senza di te…”
[My heart is sad without you…]
Tristesse by Chopin.
When I was young, my mother who was a classic-lover used to play lots of art songs from time to time.
José Carreras, Luciano Pavarotti, Plácido Domingo…
Unknowingly, I grew up while listening to the songs of all sorts of bigshots but I was in fact not very interested in it before middle school.
I only thought that they were good at singing and nothing else.
Only when I was in the second grade of middle school and entered a choir to learn singing after a strong recommendation from my mother did I realise how great they were. I realised that the songs I had been listening to everyday were in fact extremely difficult tasks.
After that, I picked one of the songs from those bigshots who then became my idols and practised them.
This song was the very first one I started.
Chopin’s Tristesse.
I had admired the beautiful song of separation which José Carreras had sung.
“Fai soffrir quest’anima che t’ama”
[Make this soul suffer that loves you]
This song called sadness was literally quite simple. It didn’t require fancy techniques, or ear-splitting high notes.
Emotions and only emotions.
How well could you express the emotion of ‘sadness’ and how well could you convey that to the audience. That was all there was to it.
In fact, wasn’t that the fundamental essence of singing?
Singing wasn’t a boastful showcase of showing off techniques or high notes but was about moving the emotions of others.
“Sei tu la vision che ogni sera…”
[You are the vision that every night…]
Softly, I whispered before slowly closing my eyes.
It was actually quite interesting when you thought about it.
Songs were nothing but waves of air resulting from vibrations of the vocal cord. How would these touch the emotions of people, you might think but… perhaps everyone has experienced it at least once.
Shuddering after listening to a song.
We tend to pick opera singers that could gift us with those experiences as the best singers.
“Sognar fa il cuor che nell’amore spera…”
[Dreaming makes the heart that in love hopes…]
However, it was difficult to have the emotions of others waver.
Specifically speaking, the standards that enable us to touch the emotions of the listeners were ambiguous. On some days, I would sing super zealously only to receive cold reactions and sometimes, there would be teary listeners after singing half-heartedly so… it was hard to make anything out of it.
However, after practising with Lee Suh-ah on the emotions and after investigating the characters following the advice of the teacher, there was something I understood.
Just like how characters spoke during acts, opera singers spoke through songs.
If a character conversed through lines, expressions and gestures, opera singers talked to the audience through lyrics, tone and pronunciation.
In the end, a song was about letting others hear my story.
Like how Lee Suh-ah was moved after listening to my poor past and how ‘O sole mio’ which I sang first after returning to the past was moving,
If I explained why I was singing this song and why I was using this voice, the listeners could be moved with more ease.
That was why teacher Kwak Jungsoo made me investigate the characters. Firstly, the singer had to know the background to relay that story over to the audience.
With admiration feeling my heart, I pulled my emotions up as the highlight approached.
“Più da me non tornerai–!”
[You’ll never come back to me–!]
Sorrowful lyrics longing for the return of the loved one…
To be honest, I didn’t really get it because I had never wanted anyone that desperately. If you were breaking up just break up and if you’re meeting someone, just meet them. Why cry over something like that?
However, there was one thing that I desired so desperately.
Songs.
There was a level I couldn’t reach no matter how much I tried and there was a wall which deterred me from advancing as limits.
That helplessness, depression and sorrow when I reached that wall.
Wouldn’t that be similar?
That was what I talked about.
“Mentre triste vola la canzon–!”
[While sad flies the song–!]