Chapter 4.4 - Sorrowfully 4 (1/2)

Seeing me binging through all the chocolate, Noh Jusup made a questioning expression.

“Aren’t you eating too much? Isn’t it hard to sing if you’re full?”

“I’m refilling my energy.”

Lee Suh-ah scoffed.

“Wasn’t it for protecting your throat?”

“Kukuk, that too.”

When I finished one container, it finally felt like my throat was being prepared – it gave off a feeling that it was coated cleanly. I was making an ‘ah ah’ sound when Han Dasom carefully met her eyes with mine.

“Yunjae will do well.”

“Thanks.”

Right, my other Chorus Busking duo, she was different from others and was a great friend. Giving a high five to the bashfully smiling Han Dasom, I turned my head.

I could see the firmly shut doors of the waiting room.

Right before the start of the Improvement Concert.

To wish me good luck, my group members came with me till here.

“I’ll go, play the accompaniment!”

“Good luck!”

With Chloe waving her hand as the last signal, we opened the doors wide.

The Future Hall waiting room. Maybe I was a bit late, but it was filled with a variety of students.

Girls wearing fancy dresses and boys with tuxedos on – perhaps it was due to this being their first performance, but I could see that they had put a lot of effort into their appearance. On top of makeup, they wore accessories that weren’t prohibited in the regulations. Fancy indeed.

When I walked deeper in, their eyes gathered.

“School uniform?”

“Didn’t it have to be a suit?”

“No there was a regulation that school uniforms were okay too.”

Chloe quickly hopped over and started a conversation.

[Yunjae! For you this is your first time on stage right? You said you were from a normal middle school.]

Stopping my feet, I thought for a bit.

First.

Right, it indeed was, a first. It was the first time I was standing on an official stage with this body. Feeling the heart slowly speeding up, I gave a smile.

[It is.]

[But you look like you’re not nervous at all. Huhuh]

[I’m a human too, how wouldn’t I be nervous?]

Confessing that she too actually did not feel nervous on stage, Chloe smiled brightly before starting more conversations. The things that had happened in the piano department to today’s dinner – while I was listening to the unending topics, she suddenly brightened her eyes.

“Oh, Yunjae! It’s starting!”

With a glance towards the door, I saw a girl in a dress leave the room

Towards the stage.

The downfall of applause and slight sound of piano could be heard. While appreciating that sound, I looked around the waiting room and found a variety of situations – Song Mirae closing her eyes at a corner, a person wearing earphones, a person glaring daggers at the music sheet and some having a chatter with their friends.

After also seeing Chloe swinging her legs back and forth, I turned my head back.

I should get prepared as well.

Slowly closing my eyes, I started a simulation. Thinking of the musical notations on the song, I simulated how to sing, as well as the important parts and… set my emotions.

The noise from the hustle around slowly went further away.

Setting emotions.

Within opera singers, there was a saying that said that we must sing from our hearts. Well, it meant that emotions were that important, but, I think it’s similar to Pavlov’s dog. So it’s like setting up beforehand what kind of emotions would lead to which techniques.

Expressions to use when sad and expressions for happiness. By training these until the body remembered it all, just thinking of an emotion would automatically bring forth the following expressions.

Instead of always thinking about what I should do here and there, if the body could naturally express it, there would be way less pressure on singing after all.

Now,

Let’s analyse the feelings that must be felt from this song, [Dies Bildnis ist bezaubernd schön]. Literally it meant that this painting was extremely beautiful… and this song starting off with such lyrics had a simple story.

A prince that did not know love was noticing such emotion by looking at a beautiful painting – an adolescent yet sorrowful song.

Love…

Tap, I felt a touch and opened my eyes to see Chloe giving a nod.

“Opera department Jo Yunjae. Please get prepared.”

My turn huh.

After blinking for a while, I slowly got up from the seat. Opening the door, a quiet creaking sound was heard as a dark corridor appeared. And in a faraway position, there were fierce spotlights hanging above.

One step at a time, I carried my feet and stood under it with the bright light embracing my body.

“Ah…”

Closing my eyes, I relaxed under the baptism of light before slowly raising my head. Through the eyes that had gotten used to the surrounding light, people’s silhouettes filling the hall entered.

From the 300 seats of the hall, around… 200 seats were filled.

Their gazes pointing down were stabbing and poking at me. Expectant eyes, bored eyes, indifferent and apathetic eyes.

I had an urge.

The urge to fill those eyes with waves of emotion.

Only when a smile crept out and a proud nervousness filled me up to the chin, did it finally feel realistic.

“…”

Once again, I was back on stage.

*

Hong Yoojin was sitting down with a grumpy expression. Glancing at the name [Opera: Jo Yunjae] on the pamphlet, she gave a scoff.

Jo Yunjae.

She remembered the call she had received a few days ago. A call from Kwak Jungsoo after a long time.

That heavy voice.

‘Yunjae… Please take care of him.’

Hong Yoojin thought she was having a hallucination. During university days, he was so stubborn and straightforward that he had a fight with a lecturer – that Kwak Jungsoo was asking her for a favour like this!

She knew there were often stories about teachers asking the judges to look fondly on their disciples but she thought at least Kwak Jungsoo would be different.

“…”

Glaring up at the stage, she saw Jo Yunjae. He was walking up alongside an accompanist girl – was her name Chloe? Crossing her arms and glaring at them, Hong Yoojin clicked her tongue. Jo Yunjae; judging from how he lured a foreigner already despite being only a few weeks in, he was not someone with a normal mouth.

‘I’ll never let him get close to our Suh-ah.’

While she was making a vow and glaring at the stage, a whispering chatter from the teachers sitting nearby entered her ears.

“Finally, student Jo Yunjae.”

“Hah, from what I saw on the admission results, he wasn’t a very good singer…”

“Who knows if he has developed from back then?”

“How much would it get better after one month… Just send him over to the conducting department please.”

Throwing her glance there, she found some unexpected people. A conducting teacher who she only knew the face of and teacher Ku Mingi. Listening to their conversations, Hong Yoojin gave a nod and scoffed.

Right, Jo Yunjae.

Although he showed some interesting parts during the Chapel, his skills that had made him come in last during the admission wouldn’t have changed. That must be why he talked the innocent teacher Kwak Jungsoo into asking her for favour.

Let’s see how good you are.