Chapter 44 - Title at the bottom* (1/2)

(Historia's POV)

Half a year had passed ever since we have joined the Cadet.

For the first 3 months, we were learning the basics of the ODM gear and do basic exercise. And in the last 3 months, we have been studying about titans' nature and how to effectively kill them.

It was also during that time, that many things have changed.

Both Armin and Eren were no longer as hot-blooded as they once were. They have learned that most of the smiley faces that everyone put on, were just a farce. Once you moved away from them, they will stare at you with envy, hostility, and sometimes even fear.

For the last emotion, it was mostly directed at Thana-kun.

Once words got out that his talent was immeasurable, people began to hate him. They hated the fact that he got everything. Girls, wealth, look, and talent. During dinner time, people would jeer at him. Sometimes, people even went as far as molesting his girlfriends but that didn't end well. Though I'm not technically one, I was also subjected to such behavior.

That's also when Thana-kun began to distance himself away from others while becoming close to some.

It saddened me greatly at the fact that Thana-kun wasn't the slightest angry at these people. It felt like as if... he was used to all the malice around him. He simply didn't care anymore; though, he would take action if people began to take things too far.

And that's exactly what happened.

Not too long ago, I was actively harassed by 3 other girls within the dorm. Rumors began to spread that I was a 'whore' who would do anything for money. Funnily, they didn't try that trick on Mikasa and Annie since they knew it was impossible. But for me, who seemed fairly more harmless than others, I was a perfect target.

Men approached me for ŀust. Women began to bother me for taking all the attention from all the men. I never asked for any of this to happen to me. None of these incidents ever take place near Thana-kun or his friends. And I have never told him a single word, even though we promised to trust each other. I didn't know why I did that. But that just prompts the bullies to attack me further.

One time, I tried to fight back. It resulted in the three girls that were the root of everything, in a near-death state.

Even though I have proven my strength, that didn't prevent others from keep trying their luck on me.

After that incident, words got out that I was a 'two-faced b*tch', who was nice in front of others, but violence in the back.

The bullying got worse.

Until...

Thana-kun saved me.

After 6 days of suffering, Thana-kun was approached by someone close to him. It was Connie.

He told Thana-kun roughly about the situation... and that's when all hell broke loose.

In just one day, he somehow identified the precise number of people that bullied me. 20 of them to be exact, 11 females and 9 males with half of them situated from a different division than ours.

I wasn't there when that happened. But from what I heard, it was a nightmare.

Someone brutally beat up those 20 people, especially the three girls that harassed me the most. 2 of them had fear deeply ingrained into their body. But the 3rd one got beaten until she became 'special' or the scientific term for it, autism. They couldn't speak a single word about the event, which ironically, lowered the number of official incidents to only 17.

Those three girls were sent back to reclaimed lands for farming, but one couldn't help but wonder if they would even be able to.

The rest of the 17 people still remained within the camp.

Strangely enough, none of them said a word about the perpetrator nor did they report it to the instructor. And neither did any people within the Cadet Corps said anything about it.

That night, I cried in his embrace.

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(Historia's POV)

”Why didn't you tell me?”

”...”

Tell what?

How could I answer him?

How could I say... just because I wanted to solve those problems myself, I didn't tell you...

How could I say I didn't want to bother you... so I broke our promise

How could I? When I don't have anything to offer... be with someone ...like him...

How could I? When he already had two girlfriends and there's no competition for me...

How could I?

How? When I loved him so much... But I don't even deserve to be together with him...

I didn't say a single word but just silently sobbing.

At least his hands were warm...

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(MC's POV)

[How? When I loved him so much... But I don't even deserve to be together with him.]

I see...

So you have been silently suffering... Historia

Even though I noticed your loneliness, I never did anything about it.

And now things had escalated this far... all because of me.

Worse... I didn't even notice your feelings for me... You have hidden them quite well Historia.

No... That was just a lie. I did notice. I just pretended I didn't know.

You were obviously hinting that you liked me.

But seeing me not reciprocating back, you have given up on pursuing me. Yet you still loved me... and that's hurting you.

And now me too...

I'm a bastard...

I knew it from the beginning.