Chapter 647: The Spoked Offensive (1/2)
”The Enemy Improved Himself Today, Did You?” - Combined Military Authority Inspirational Poster
”I told you yesterday, no!” - graffiti at the bottom of the poster.
”WE'RE ON AN EXPRESS ELEVATOR TO HELL!” - unknown, LV-426 Incident, Pre-Glassing
”I might not be able to win, I can make sure I don't lose.” - Unknown
”A Terran only knows his true self during hardship and strife, all else is a mask he uses to pretend to be what he is not.” - Treana'ad Proverb
”Your blows are as effective as your advertising.” - Razor Wit Wendy, The Hamburger Wars.
There was a thick mist on the floor that came up to Natraya's knees as they moved down the hallway, the lemur grinning like he just invented sexual intercourse and was about to inform the galaxy of its methods. On'trak the Tukna'rn was behind her, dragging his thick metal girder that covered in clotted blood and gore.
”...go round and round,” the lemur was singing. His voice had a harsh nasal buzz.
Probably because he had two purple crystals from a shard pistol jammed up his nose.
A door whooshed open and a spawn lunged from the other side. The lemur, without looking or breaking stride, popped its head off with a backfist just by lifting it's arm, bent at the elbow, and rotating the shoulder.
The spawn fell back and the door whooshed shut.
”The wipers on the bus go swish swish swish,” the lemur kept singing, swinging his arms freely, his fists surrounded by faint misty blue nimbus. He had thin tendrils of blue electricity arcing along his musculature, up and down his spine, and the three red lights at the base of his skull burned defiantly.
Natraya knew she was smiling, a wide crazed smile. Her nose had stopped bleeding and her headache was gone, instead she felt like there was a steady buzzing inside her head. A warm, buzzing feeling that made her spine tingle and her fur feel like it was electrified as it stood on end. She no longer felt like a tiny fur covered live young bearing reptile in a world full of bigger beings that could hurt her whenever they wanted.
”...swish swish swish...”
She'd learned that she could make them die.
She held up the bladearm, which was chipped and scratched now, and licked the blade entirely down the serrated edge with her tongue.
The spark that jumped from between her tongue and the bladearm tasted like kegliberries.
”...horn on the bus goes honk honk honk...”
Natraya knew her eyes were wide, her vestigal inner eyelid somehow slid over her eyes, but did not care. She knew that others of her people would find her insane look to be something to fear and would run away to call the authorities in case she was a danger to others.
I am a danger to others, she thought, licking the blade again. They took her Ladyship from me, from the universe, from those who needed her.
”...honk honk honk...”
Another long lick on the blade, the tickle of thin threads of bluish energy along her tongue.
I'll make them die for that, she thought savagely.
Two doors whooshed open, revealing a Dweller on either side, leaning forward slightly and obviously preparing to fire those terrible conical psychic blasts.
”...go squeak squeak squeak,” the lemur sang as it slammed both fists outward, into the facial tentacles of both.
The two Dwellers collapsed back into the room, their mouths stuffed full of their own tentacles, trembling hands reaching up to their faces, their eyelids pulled down from their eyes to expose the bottom edge of the sockets. They made muffled screams as they went backwards, blood spraying from the ruptured tentacles.
”...squeak squeak squeak...”
The doors closed before Natraya reached them.
On'trak merely nodded, holding up his left arm and practicing rotating his arm at the shoulder with his elbow bent at a ninety degree angle with his fist clenched. He could feel the power in the blow and marveled at the simplicity of it as he followed along, dragging the floor support with one hand and practicing the simple blow with the other.
It is indeed a fine blow, On'trak thought to himself. My father and clan would be proud of such a blow, should it be learned correctly.
”Come on, I'm bored,” the lemur whined, stopping in front of a membrane covered door. It looked around, then up at the ceiling. ”I swear to Christ, if I go in here and it's another pack of purple morons I'm going to find whoever you are, grab your ass cheeks, and rip you lengthwise.”
Four chitin barriers slammed across the door, creating a four layer thick barrier over the membrane.
The lemur turned and grinned at Natraya and On'trak.
”Guess they're bringing in their A-team finally,” he said. He flexed and again Natraya would swear the walls flexed outward with him. ”Good. That means they're reactive and don't have anti-boarding measures.”
”How do you know?” On'trak asked.
”Easy. Boarding actions go one of three ways. First ways is: they have everyone rush you at once, that's the most common with pirates and the like. Second way is: they stage it, one layer at a time, each layer stronger than the other, with the most powerful being in the engine room, engineering, and the command deck. That's common with paramilitary forces or low martial cultures. The last one is to escalate as the boarders are able to overcome threats, most common to paramilitaries or basic martial cultures,” his grin somehow got wider. ”If we were facing a military grade threat, it would have been response teams backed up by troops in heavier gear that could even damage the ship or station, moving as a coherent whole to cut off, isolate, and draw the boarders into a kill zone.”
The Tukna'rn nodded. ”And what are these?”
”A combination of two and three, meaning they're a basic martial culture. Since they show up with a lot of drone creatures and robotics, they have martial strategy, but not when it comes to personal attack and defense, which means their strategies are based on them always having the upper hand,” the grin got even wider and Natraya wondered if the corners of his mouth were going to meet at the back of his head.
”When they can't must mash the win button, they don't know what to do,” he said. He turned around and Natraya found out she was a little disappointed that the grin didn't go completely around his head. ”They'll throw their A-team at us next.”
”Then what happens?” On'trak asked.
”They kill us,” the lemur said. He laughed. ”Or, at least, they'll try to. From what I've seen so far, I'll kill them, then they'll panic.”
”I want them all to die,” Natraya said.
”Since they aren't obliged to just fall down dead, sister, I guess we'll have to help them fulfill your Make-a-Wish,” the lemur chuckled.
”Why did you put those projectiles in your nose?” On'trak asked.
”Because it's funny,” the lemur said. He stepped back, made the slow circular motions with his arms. ”Let's sell some Amway.”
Before Natraya could ask what that meant the lemur spun in place and kicked the door covering.
The first three layers shattered into large chunks that fell to the floor, the last layer, over the membrane, was crazed and cracked.
The lemur spun in place, lashing out with his bare foot again, the blue nimbus leaving behind a trail of glowing energy.
The chitin shattered and the door screamed as it dented in.
Natraya tightened her grip on the sword, licking the edge of the blade again in what had rapidly become a habit.
Another spinning kick and a chunk of the door flew free. He made a motion and Natraya and On'trak pushed themselves against the wall.
The lemur pushed his face into the whole.
”HEEEEEEEERE'S JOHNNY!” he yelled.
The lemur pulled back right before long thin crystals, plasma packets, and thick streaks of phasic energy screamed through the hole.
”More shard gun rounds, look like rifles, light plasma weapons in the fifteen watt range, and light phasic thrusts,” the lemur said, watching the projectiles go by. He looked at Natraya and On'trak as he made a fist, curled his other hand around it, and squeezed, popping his knuckles. He repeated it, still grinning with the shard projectiles up his nose. ”Dis gonna be goot.”
The Tukna'rn nodded tightly.
Natraya just licked up the blade.