Chapter 102 - dont forgive me (2/2)

The girl in male clothes dissipates into air as soon as he touches her.

”I buried myself alive.” She lifts her small head. Seeing her in that state makes him cry in agony There was a time when all she wanted was to die.

The torture keeps repeating until...

”Please believe me once.” She begs me with a pained voice as he rips her clothes. ”Kang Si An, please don't do this to me.”

”Stop.” He attempts to stop his hands from hurting her. ”Stop. You monster. Stop right at this moment.”

Then, the silence descends in the air. It's dark. There's no Kyuri. No memories are replaying over and over again. There is no one in the room except him. The bottle of alcohol is broken on the floor. He takes his phone and leaves the apartment. He can't spend another moment here.

It's 3:15 AM on his watch. He walks on the street with unsteady feet. Drunk and hopeless, he tries to recall her smile that she showed to him.

”Kang Si An.” She entwines her fingers with his as they walk on the street. ”You will outlive me this time. Don't forget that you promised me.”

”Did I?” The woman beside him vanishes again from his side. He can't tell anymore whether he is laughing at himself or crying for her. He keeps walking. Why he is still sane? He climbs the stair one by one, murmuring her name with each step. He reaches the roof. The sky is dark. There is no visible star. There is no moon tonight. Everything has forsaken him.

He sits on the edge with half of his body hanging in the air. He stares at her picture that he stole from her house.

Having a child. Building happiness with her. Taking evening walks with her and their daughter. The way she would tease him. The way he would see her fret after their daughter.

This is a future that never happened. It would never happen. She already belongs to someone else. Someone else has replaced him. She's happy without him.

He deserves this all.

He scrolls through his social media account. He has been posting messages with her name every day since she left, hoping that she would see one. He won't ask anymore. If she wants to punish him this way, he will accept it. He won't ask her to come back anymore.

They have never said goodbye in the past because they knew they would see each other.

He can't see her anymore. She won't allow it. Even from the distance, he can't look at her.

[Kyuri, don't forgive me. I don't deserve it. I know that you don't love me anymore. You don't want me to see you. This is your punishment for me. I will accept it all. Please live happily without me. I pray that all the wounds that I gave you become nothing compared to the happiness that you receive in the future. Goodbye.]

The phone slips from his hand. He doesn't know whether she will ever see this message or not. It's fine if she doesn't see it. She will find out in one or another way. He hums the same tune that she used to sing occasionally. Closing his eyes, he imagines being with her. He reaches out to grab her hand. Falling through the air, he finds himself alone again.