7 06 (1/2)

Darkness soon enveloped me once again. Nightmares came about once again. This time, it felt so real.

My parents hugged me and told me they loved me. The hug felt so warm that I could feel it. This is what love is isn't it? But then, everything was sucked into a black hole. Everything I treasured, everything I loved, all gone in an instant. The next thing I saw was my parents, sewn together with a spider body. My whole entire body shivered as I saw it. The creature called me names.

”You useless filth! You killed both of us! You shouldn't be allowed to live!” Tears came dripping down one by one, staining my porcelain face.

”My dear, come with us. We will spend our lives together once again.” Mother's voice rang out. I wiped my tears and saw that familiar hand. My hand stretched out and held that hand. The familiar warmness flowing through me.

I allowed myself to be surrounded the darkness that wrapped me. The familiar presence of my parents was there. Everything I loved and treasured was there. Nothing could go wrong right? But no, everything was melting. It was like wax, slowly melting.

”Papa! Mama! Please don't go!” I cried out. Tears came in full force, streaming down my face like a river. The monster let out a hideous scream but I could hear my parents.

”Our dear daughter... Don't give in...” I couldn't make out anything else as it let out one last hideous scream, saying it will be back. Something picked me up and threw me into another black hole. The emptiness felt so nice, I wouldn't think to move.

Being enveloped by the deep darkness, my voice not being able to scream, the feeling of being constantly pulled. It was terrifying and scary at the same time. Not being able to call out to someone, was nice. Nobody would have to care about me. Being constantly pulled back reminds me of being the outcast. I slowly closed my eyes, waiting to die of the lack of oxygen.

I opened my eyes once again to see the bright daylight. I quickly covered my eyes with my pillow and rolled around. I got into a ball position and grabbed the box cutter that was on my bedside table. The blade gleamed as the sunlight shone on it. I traced it gently around the older cuts before applying pressure.

Blood trickled down, little by little. My smile slowly regained as this was just repayment for killing them. The pain felt comforting as more blood came oozing out.

Papa... Mama... Sorry for being a disappointment. You wanted me to live like a happy girl don't you? I can't bear the guilt anymore. Everyday it feels like death. Repeating the same thing over and over again. I'm sorry...

My eyes closed as I fell into another deep sleep once again.