Chapter 128 - Choice, which I don’t have (1/2)

Chapter 128: Choice, which I don’t have

Is it worth?

I close my eyes, then open again, continue to look at the ceiling.

I even dare not to close my eyes. Because once I close it, it seems as if I see Jim is standing in front of me and saying to me coldly: “I’m sorry, little 5.”

Sorry?

Sorry!

I pull a smile from the corner of my mouth unconsciously, then I glance at the fat fellow’s face, saying slowly: “I… I don’t know.”

His face is calm, then he is coming up to put his cigarette in my mouth and let me take a puff. Then take it away. This action makes me feel warm.

“I feel terrible.” I squeeze these words out of my mouth and turn to look at him. For this moment, I’m feeling very weak. The real weak!

“I understand. It’s normal for you to feel bad now,” he is saying lightly. There’s a slight mockery in his eyes, “Do you believe me now?”

“What?”

“Remember what I told you the day before yesterday?” He is saying coldly, “There is no kindness in the world that you can repay with your life, except for your own parents.”

I struggle to raise my finger. He takes the cigarette for me again. This time, he simply leaves half of the cigarette on my mouth and lights another one for himself.

“I used to regard Juan as my father.” I’m clenching my teeth and looking at fat fellow. He’s stunned for a moment, eyes slowly falling on my face: “Father?”

“Yes.” I’m smiling, but my eyes are wet, “When I went to school, my parents passed away. Later, I had a master who was the first great benefactor in my life. Unfortunately, he died early and I could not repay him. Juan was the second. He gave me alomost everything. He gave me job, good payment, trainings and trusts. He looked up to me, took me as his confidant…”

I am describing calmly about what happened when I was found by Juan; about how Juan promoted me from a dish boy; about Juan asked me to practice boxing together, sauna with him, then rub his back. At that time, he was really like my father!

When I’m speaking. Fat fellow does not interrupt, just listening quietly all the time.

After listening, he is suddenly sighing, standing up and walking to the window. He is looking out with his back to me, then suddenly laughing with sarcastic: “Juan seems to have misread this time!”

I look at him, somewhat puzzling.

He is turning around and staring at me: “It’s a pity! Juan is tough enough and skilled enough to control people. Unfortunately, he misread you! He really misread you, kid!”

I still utter no word.

He flickes the cigarette ash quickly and saying lightly: “I didn’t expect you to be such a person! Kid, I was wrong on you too. You are not only persistent, but also too stubborn that you don’t know how to live or die! If Juan is smarter, hey! If I were him, I would find you directly and tell you face to face that I’m facing death. If you don’t die, I’ll be dead. If I were him, I would not send people to kill you, but to tell you these words in person. With your personality and his position in your heart, I am almost sure that you would even die for him voluntarily without sending someone to kill you!”

At this point, he is laughing as if he has seen the most ridiculous thing in the world: “The smarter the more foolish! Juan, you’ve done a stupid thing this time!”

After laughing enough, he is sighing, looking at me, thinking a while, and sighing again: “Actually… Nor can he be said to be foolish, but in his way of thinking, it is impossible to think of the possibility of voluntary sacrifice on your own initiative.”

I’m silent.

Indeed, if Juan didn’t send Jim to kill me, but of told me face to face calmly that if I don’t die, this thing would be impossible to solve, and he would die himself. In such a situation, maybe I would really die for him!

No… Not maybe, that’s almost sure!

“It is impossible for a selfish people to understand the selflessness.” Fat fellow is smiling, shaking his head and sighing, “Actually, Juan also really had no idea already. Subordinate like you, there’s no boss won’t like! There are too few loyal people nowadays. You are willing to serve him, abandon your love and life to save her daughter to escape. Such sentiment, which boss does not like? He wants your life just for self-preservation. What morality, what kindness, really at the critical moment of life and death, they just think of themselves. Nor can he be regarded as selfish, but morally speaking, it’s too chilling for you!”

I still have no words.

I just feel very disappointed.

My heart is as freeze as an ice!

With a reluctant smile, I am gasping and saying: “Thank you anyway.”

He’s shaking his hand: “I may not be a good man. I just think that it’s a pity that a boy like you would die like this. So, I just try to save your life.”

I really feel ridiculous.

Juan, I have tried my best to protect his daughter’s life, I insisted on not giving up, but he wants to kill me at last! And a complete stranger saved my life just because I pleasing to his eyes

I sigh: “Where is this place?”

“A safe place.” Fat fellow is saying with the smile, “That doctor is good, isn’t he? He just has a bad temper. He was medical soldier. Both of us used to carry guns and been to battlefields together. Now he’s a veterinarian. But the medical skill is really good. Don’t worry, if he says that you won’t die, you won’t die. That fellow’s face stinks a little bit, but his eyes are still accurate.”

Then he comes up to me, touching the bandage on my body gently, and then laughing: “Unfortunately, you have good skin and flesh, look very energetic, but you’ll have many scars in future. Within so many scars, it must be frightening to wear less clothes in summer. Finding a girlfriend is likely to be affected.”

How can I have interesting in talking about this now? I’m just smiling bitterly and saying nothing. Fat fellow raises his eyebrows and laughing: “Well, actually you don’t have to worry about it. A man living without depand on appearances! Only women live on their fucking pretty faces! Men with the ability to do everything!”

He is sitting down slowly, looking at me: “What do you want to do after that?”

“I don’t know yet.”

I’m telling the truth.

I really don’t know what else I can do. I don’t know where the path is.

Originally, my goal was to protect Dorra and send the girl to Juan safely. Now this thing is over. But Juan is going to kill me. Who else can I find? Where else can I go?

“Hate?” Fat fellow looks at my face and asking suddenly.

“Hate? Not hate?” I shake my head and my neck moves the wounds. I feel very pain, “I can’t tell.”

Just then, the door is knocked outside.

Fat fellow is frowning and shouting: “Doc, knocking your ass! Don’t you have a key?”

No one answers, just still knocking.

“Bang! Bang! Bang!”

Three knocks, two long, one short.

Fat fellow’s face is becoming heavyly at once. He is standing up slowly, glancing at me quickly, then looking at the door, muttering to himself: “Damn, this guy is really dead-hearted.”

He reaches out to search the under of my bed slowly and pulling out a pistol, looking at me coldly: “Lie still.”