496 But I No Longer Have a Home (1/2)
Yes, envy!
In the past, this was a word that Lin Ran would rather die than to say to Lin Nuan!
After Lin Ran did an honest assessment of her own feelings, she clearly realized that all the hatred she felt towards Lin Nuan stemmed from envy.
Lin Nuan listened to Lin Ran's peaceful speech, her gaze lowered, looking at the tips of her toes. When she spoke, her voice was clear and clean, relieved and gentle…
”Actually, I've always been envious of you. Even before the truth of our identities was revealed, although you lived in poor living conditions, the Lus truly adored and doted on you! After the truth came to light, the Lins tried their best to make it up to you with all that you asked for. But I never had the chance to enter my birth mother's heart. My biological father committed suicide out of guilt, not even leaving a message for me. Lin Ran, at least your parents are still around, but I no longer have a home…”
Lin Nuan's tone was peaceful, but Lin Ran's eyes had turned red on the other end of the line.
Lin Ran furrowed her brows as she recalled all that had happened when she was living at the Lus' house…
She recalled that in the heavy rain, that tall and well-built man had ridden on his bicycle to pick her up from school. The school didn't allow bicycles or cars to enter, and there was muddy water all around the unpaved road on the way to school; it was her Lu father who had carried her on his back all the way from the gate to the entrance of the school!
On the way back, the bicycle had broken down mid-journey, so he gave his raincoat to her and was drenched in the rain from pushing his faulty bicycle the remaining several kilometers back home!
She was only mildly drenched by the time they got home, but that tall and well-built man's clothes were dripping wet without him wringing them. The man caught her worried expression and simply smiled as he picked up a towel to wipe his hair dry, then took off his shirt to wring it, saying with a smile on his face, ”So long as our Ran Ran isn't drenched, all is good!”
Lin Ran recalled that, in order to be able to afford a pair of running shoes that she fancied, her Lu father had borrowed a sewing machine from the neighbor and started making those air-conditioning covers that he could sell for next to nothing…
At 3 in the morning, when she groggily opened her eyes, her father was still sitting by the sewing machine with his forehead full of sweat. Her mentally-ill mother was squatting by the side and neatly stacking those air-conditioning covers, mumbling to herself, ”Buy Ran Ran running shoes… Buy Ran Ran running shoes…”
She also recalled that mentally-ill mother had, for a White Rabbit Toffee, played a game of Justice Bao holding court just like on TV with a bunch of kids. She was pressed onto the ground and allowed those kids to whack her bottom with a rod. Lin Ran ran over to chase those kids like a maniac, questioning her mother about why she played with those kids and allowed herself to be humiliated like that! She just opened her palms and said to Lin Ran, ”Ran Ran likes this, Ran Ran eat… Mama doesn't feel pain!”
Lin Ran covered both eyes with one hand, but tears kept slipping down; there was an indescribable feeling in her heart…
”Lin Ran, if you return to the country, go take a look at Mom. I don't know what Mom's world is like right now, but what I do know is… in that world, you're her everything!” Lin Nuan's voice sounded raspy.
On the other end of the line, Lin Ran didn't say anything and just hung up quietly.
Hearing the sound of the ended call, Lin Nuan's eyes turned slightly watery. She lightly smiled…
Ever since Lin Ran and Lin Nuan had swapped their identities back, Lin Ran was eager to shake off the past and had never been to visit Ji Yun.
Lin Nuan had been thinking… if Lin Ran had gone, would Ji Yun's condition be slightly better?
Lin Nuan shifted the phone away from her ears, quietly sitting by the side of the bed. She raised a hand to wipe away the moisture at the corners of her eyes, laughing lightly. She was, in fact, very fortunate, because she had Fu Huai'an, and also Tuan Tuan!
Lin Nuan let out a long exhale and got her spirits up. She still had to go to the AG company today, so she had to get her spirits up.