Chapter 104 - Big Mistake, Pal (1/2)

I took action as soon as their guards were down. With the mysterious golden thread in hand, I jumped. from the overhanging tree branch and landed on my Father like a madman.

”Young Master?” Mary was taken aback by his sudden appearance.

”F.u.c.k!” Meanwhile Father was cursing, clearly taken by surprise. But I activated Pimp-Slap and caused him to see stars. We toussled a bit, rolling on the ground and grabbing at each other. We panted as our struggle against each other escalated, our clothes being ripped to shreds as we fought for a better purchase. Soon enough our bodies were on full display from the waist up. Our muscles flexed hard.

He was agile and strong, but so was I. And having done this numerous times against the man, I knew his patterns. It wasn't long before slowly, but surely, the golden thread was worked around him.

Father was rendered immobile in minutes. ”The hell is this?” He tried breaking free but it was useless. There was no escape.

I grinned and placed my foot over his chest. ”You guys thought you could send me off just like that? Fools.”

”You were following us.” Father realized. ”Shit. How did we not…”

I snorted coldly. ”I am a man who has become one with the herb. There is no way you could sense me in my place of power.”

”What sort of bullshit are you spouting? Mary, at least, should've--”

”She is the herb I became one WITH.” I cut him off. ”Of course she can't distinguish me from herself! Our bodies are forever tied to one another, inseperable in this life and the next! There's no way for either of us to know where one begins and the other ends! Right, honey?” I sent Mary a glance.

”I...I don't...what?” She looked horribly confused. She shook her head. ”No. I won't be caught up in your nonsense this time. What do you think you're doing? Release him at once.”

”F.u.c.k that. You guys were talking about sending me away.” I slapped her ass hard in irritation, causing her to yelp and become flush with anger.

”Insolent little...how dare you!”

”Quiet or I pull it out right now.” I threatened.

That shut her up real quick.

”Hmph. And you're the insolent one. If you think you can make me leave without you, you have another thing coming. I'm not giving you up. Besides, Mother's going to send for an army and as you're connected to the world and I'm sure she'll get really destructive, who knows if that will damage you or not? But I'm going to bet that any serious damage done to the world will affect you too. Could be wrong, but i won't take that chance. So no, you WON'T send me away. You're going to wait for me to come get you like a good little girl, we'll find a new place to crash, establish the Holy Milf Empire, marry, and you and Vee will give me a tiny rainforest to raise up.”

Mary looked at me with a slightly agap mouth. She shook her head. ”Idiot. What kind of things are you rambling about? There's no way that could happen.”

”Which part?”

”Every!”

”Oh. Nah, I'm pretty confident.”

”You're a stubborn fool.” The woman's brows came together in yet another show of anger. ”Is your head as full of daisies as that sister of yours? You can't stay here. If you do, who knows what would happen? The Divines themselves are--”

”A buncha horny yandere bitches, yes, I know. I'm aware. But know what, let me worry about them. I'll cultivate well, get OP, and smack them around a few times to teach them a lesson. ”

Father, still trying to break free, muttered, ”Crazy ass f.u.c.ker…” Louder, he asked, ”Seriously what IS this?”

Mary only now took the time to look at his binds ”That thread…”

”I'm pretty sure it's Goddess hair, but don't ask me if it's from the top or bottom because I don't want to know.” I supplied helpfully. This was the stuff the Angels used on Mary's wrists.

When I picked it up the system told me it was a very rare item that was capable of binding higher level beings. I always kept it close and when Mother was attacking us I thought maybe I could use it on her. But she was too fast so I abandoned that idea. I figured that at my level it would only work if I could surprise her.

”I don't have any more of it so I'll let you go eventually, but I'm going to use it on Mother later on.” I explained.” I don't care about her little hissy fit. I'm the one who got r.a.p.ed and I ain't even that mad. Not for the **** part, at least. So her bringing a war that might hurt my Mary? Nope. F.u.c.k that. I'm tying her up until I get back, then we're evacuating this planet. And Mary, you get to be her warden. You can rough her up and fondle her b.r.e.a.s.ts a little if you want, just remember to send me the vids.” I gave her a thumbs up.

”I have no desire to do that at all.” She monotoned.

”Big sad.” I sighed.

Father squirmed on the ground restlessly, clearly pissed off. ”So you're going to hold us prisoner until you can transplant the planet?!”

I kicked him. ”Yeah! I am! And what are you bitching about? You deserve all this. You and Mother. Like how the hell could you choose her over Mary?! Look at her! She's precious, goddammit!” I pointed to the woman.

”You bitch...did you seriously just kick your own father?”

Meanwhile Mary focused on something different. ”Hey, what are you talking about so suddenly?” She asked uneasily.

Ignoring father's comment, I questioned,”Well it's true, right?” I kicked the man once more.

”You f.u.c.k.i.n.g shit, when I get out of these….” He threatened.

”Quiet. Look at how cute she is. She really loved you, you know? But Noooo….like a dense protagonist you didn't notice at all!”

”She...she what?” He looked utterly shocked. His face went dark. ”...No. Either way, it's none of your--”

”Shut the f.u.c.k up, I aint done.” I put my shoe on his face. ”I bet you liked her too, but you were indecisive because she's so pretty, right? F.u.c.k.i.n.g weak ass shit right there, pops. You coulda had all that.” I gestured expansively towards Mary, ”But you blew it. And she still likes you, even. Seriously. Like you talk just now, for example. How THE HELL can you not have realized she wanted you to be a bit jealous that she was with me?”

”I just wanted her to be happy, what's wrong with that?!”

”Because she wanted to be happy with you!.”

”I'm married!” He argued.

I wasn't having it. ”Then cheat!”

”Cheat?” He sat there for a moment. stunned. ”F.u.c.k.i.n.g what the hell. Why am I the bad guy here? If I did that do you even know how many ways and on how many levels I'd be f.u.c.k.i.e.d?”

”Mary's worth it. Coward.” I condemned him.

He was speechless.

”Please stop.” Mary broke in, sounding mortified. ”You've said enough!”

”...Anyway, you didn't pick up on her feelings at all. Jesus you are one stupid son of a bitch, just seeing you pisses me off.” I kicked him a third time. ” And mother! Shame on that bitch. I'll kick her later too! Just thinking about her using Mary and tossing her away like a used towel...ah, should I kill her? I should just kill her, right?”

”No, hold on, you're going too fast...you're saying they were together? What?”

”It was a long time ago.” Mary muttered. ”It didn't mean anything.”

”For her, yeah.” I folded my arms. ”How she could just up and leave you one day is beyond me. I really just wanna smack her. Well, I will. Later. But yeah. You shitty dense bastard. You dare ignore the cute, sweet, loving Mary and pick some random lizard bitch with a bipolar disorder? Why I oughta…” I waved my fist. ”Ah, forget it. Fact is ya done goofed. She's my tree now! Right?”

”When did I agree to become yours, exactly? Don't answer that!” She quickly added.

”So do you want to kick him?”

”No!” She snapped. ”Honestly. What, did you think I'll thank you for this? I don't need you to stick up for me.” Her tone was glacial.

”Who the hell said I'm sticking up for you?” I countered. ” I know I don't have to. I'm not, either. I'm venting! What's it to you? These bastards made my lovable big tree sad, why can't I be pissed off?!”

She stared at me. ”You're impossible.” Was all she could say.

”Thanks. Now should we head back? There's a boar over the fire and I could use your help finding some herbs.”

I led her away by the arm.

”Wait, you aren't going to just leave me here, are you? Hey.”

”I hope you get eaten.” I waved without looking back.

”You unfilial bastard child. Really your mother's kid.” Father swore. ”M-Mary...come on, you won't abandon me here….right?”

She paused and sent him a deep look. ”I…” She hesitated. The woman went quiet for a while.