146 War Breaks Ou (1/2)
[Top Student's Glasses: These are ordinary silver-rimmed glasses and wearing them will make you seem slightly smarter. Yeah, just slightly. Let me tell you, these are obviously ordinary glasses that the top students use to blind their competitors!]
[Top Student's Decayed Teeth: ”Yes, it's these teeth. Wuuuuu, it's this one! It almost killed me!”]
[Top Student's Dentures: ”My dentures are actually poisonous teeth filled with venom! Don't force me to bite you. Lick… AHHHHHH, it's poisonous!”]
[When you gather the full set ”Top Student's Glasses,” ”Top Student's Decayed Teeth,” and ”Top Student's Dentures,” you will gain the special effect ”Dunce Masquerading as the Top Student”. Your retorting abilities will be increased by 30%, integrity score will be lowered by 30% while your Cuteness Might will be increased by 30%—System hasn't eaten my medicine yet, but I still feel cute!]
”Where should I start retorting from? Should I start from how the three top students' equipment would turn one into a dunce? Or should I start from how I can equip those two teeth? Furthermore, if I put those poisonous teeth into my mouth, I would probably die! Further, what's with those additional abilities? What the heck is Cuteness Might? Do I need better retorting ability or a decreased integrity score? My integrity already has no lower limits, alright! I have already long given up on treatment, alright! There are too many points to retort about this, there is no way I can retort on them all, alright!”
Every time I see those Lottery rewards which were filled with numerous retort points, my desire to retort would skyrocket. At this moment, after a whole series of ripostes, I panted heavily with the System interface before me, my gaze fixated on it.
”I will kill you with my glare, glower you to death!”
Alright, I knew that I looked foolish like that. However, what could I do to an existence I couldn't reach but kept doing me in? Nothing, except killing them with my glare.
Perhaps I had spent too many Fate Points reconstructing my body; the recent Lottery reward was getting worse and worse. The items that I had obtained were mostly objects that left people speechless.
[The Wordless Book of Heaven: The unparalleled Way of Heaven is contained within it.]
Alright, I didn't know what the Book of Heavens was about, but if a book had no words, how could one comprehend it?
[Balala the Fairies Transformation Wand: I ate a lot of medicine today and feel cute! If you sing ”In the name of the moon, I'll punish you”* and dance while transforming, there will be bonus enhancement to your stats! Furthermore, it is pink!]
Alright, I don't think that I need to go any further than that. After managing to get this non-mainstream magical wand, I immediately walked over to my window, opened it and threw it out.
”Who would say such embarrassing words! Farewell!”
[Sacred Sword: Togashi** Must Die—The new member of the ”One Shot One Kill (Must Die)” sword series, the product of the resentment of readers and editors. The One Shot One Kill (Wrecking Their Ass) effects apply to those who submit their manuscripts late and tour in the name of finding inspiration for their work. Also, it would be an incredible sight if you use it along with the one above.]
Alright, putting aside those obviously ill-humored, bizarre objects, the System did give some ”good items” as well.
[DF-41 Intercontinental Ballistic Missile: Don't say that the System didn't give you anything good. As long as you are able to use it and dare to use it, this object is definitely formidable.]
When I saw the object, I was shocked. However, when I saw the user manual that came along with it, I knew that I have been duped.
”It requires specialized equipment for the launch of the missile? I can still find a way to solve that, but what do you mean by the missile will be locked if the password entered is incorrect? Where can I find the password required for the missile launch? Do I have to rip it apart to examine it? However, if it explodes on me, will you pay me? Furthermore, how can there be an intercontinental missile in a world revolving around magic? I dare you give me something normal, like the incantation of a powerful Forbidden Spell!”
And the System really did it. In the next draw, I got a powerful, otherworldly spell incantation.
[Dragon Slave: Darkness beyond twilight, crimson beyond blood that flows, buried in the stream of time is where your power grows...]***
When that incantation from my childhood appeared before me, my entire body started trembling in anticipation.
”Ohhhhh! As long as I chant the incantation, I will be able to borrow strength from the otherworldly Demon Lord to cast this ultimate-level Forbidden Spell? Without using much mana, I will be able to use this highly destructive Forbidden Spell? Awesome!”
Thus, I looked for a remote location to experiment it myself.
Did I fail? Was there a problem with the incantation? No, the items from the System were all authentic. I succeeded and the incantation was the official one and it worked. I managed to connect with the otherworldly Demon Lord.
”Welcome to the Otherworldly Demon Lord Summoning System…. The Demon Lord whom you are calling is currently unavailable, please try again later. Dududu, I thank you for your support of the Incantation System.”
Alright, the Demon Lord was busy and he was unavailable.… I could understand that the Incantation System was the exclusive privilege of a certain other world and it was normal for me to be unable to get into contact with him, but what was with the reply afterward!
”After which, please rate our services. Are you satisfied, or are you very satisfied? Of course, it is also alright for you to choose the completely satisfied option!”
Of this ”Dear customer, I am father. If you don't want to use my services, feel free to leave” customer service, what can I do? I hung up and stared speechlessly at the blue sky.
Actually, this wasn't the worst. Once I managed to draw a bunch of legendary treasures. Looking at those orange-colored artifacts, I almost died from delight.
”Hah, One-Star Ball, Two-Star Ball… Seven-Star Ball. If I gather all seven, can I really realize my wish?”
Back then, I hadn't been duped by the System too badly yet. After drawing 6 Dragon Balls straight and receiving confirmation from the System about the effects of the Seven Dragon Balls, I waited expectantly for the final Dragon Ball to fall into my hands. In fact, I even started to plan on how I should make use of my wish and how I should achieve the greatest benefits through it. I even filled an entire journal with my plans.
However, in the dozen or so Lottery draws in the next year, I never received the final Dragon Ball. Eventually, I could only howl helplessly in anger.
”From the very start, you were trying to scam me, right? Is this the darned game lottery system that our country came up with? There is no prize at all, right!”
”...Due to the karmic effects regarding the Four-Star Dragon Ball being too great, I can only arrange a mission for you. If you are able to triumph over its guardian, it will be yours.”
I had watched the Dragon Ball manga back then. Who was the owner of the Four-Star Dragon Ball? Wasn't it the protagonist of the manga, Son Goku?
Challenge Son Goku? Recalling those ridiculous experts in the manga who destroyed planets as they pleased, I shuddered.
However, I soon remembered how the manga was when it first started, when the plot was still normal. Back then, the Seven Dragon Balls had already appeared and perhaps, the one to appear before me wouldn't be such a ridiculous existence. There was still a chance for success.
”It is the young Goku from the start, right? It can't be that it is the Super Saiyan who destroyed planets with a single strike in the later part of the manga.… Why aren't you answering? It can't be that it is the even more ridiculous Super Saiyan 3?”
”Don't worry, it's not 3, it's 33. Super Saiyan 33!”
”Don't try to fool me, I read the manga! There is no Super Saiyan 33 in that world!”
”Cough, it is a parallel universe that we live in. Due to the overwhelming popularity of Dragon Ball in the world, the editor didn't allow the manga to end. As such, the show dragged on from Super Saiyan 3 to Super Saiyan 33. Sigh, you don't know how ludicrous the power system became in the end. At the very start, they destroyed worlds and planets, but eventually they went on to destroy galaxies and universes.”