Chapter 654: Apathy (1/2)

Silence.

Deafening silence.

Gravis had gone through intense emotional turmoil, and he felt like he had reached the absolute bottom. He felt like he had lost control over his entire life, and the worst thing was that he accepted it.

If Heaven weren't powerful enough to kill him right now, would he have still done this? Would he have handed over his children?

Gravis wasn't sure.

He wasn't sure about anything anymore.

Gravis' human form began to regress more in age until he only looked to be about twelve years old. He felt like a child under the control of adults. When adults talked, children were supposed to be quiet and follow what the adults said.

”Don't overdo it,” Heaven said. ”Look at yourself. You feel like a child now? Stop feeling sorry for yourself. This situation all stems from your decision to fight me. Don't escape into your childhood to dodge responsibility.”

Gravis gritted his teeth.

'How pathetic am I?' he thought with frustration.

In a matter of seconds, Gravis returned to the body of a young adult.

'So what!?' Gravis thought with gritted teeth. 'I'm not dead! My family isn't dead! Heaven is right! Everything stems from my arrogance! I have made this choice, and I need to bear the consequences!'

'I have already reached rock-bottom! It can only go up from here!' Gravis thought.

'Yes, I have taken a huge setback, but only when I give up will I truly lose! I might have failed in having a pure path to power. I might have failed in reaching supreme power without the highest Heaven's help, but I still have my dream of freedom! Isn't freedom my most important goal!?'

'Yet, is this true freedom?' Gravis thought as uncertainty returned to his being. 'Is it truly my choice to forgive Heaven?'

Gravis violently shook his head.

'This is a problem for the future!' he thought with narrowed eyes. 'Just because I can't see a way out now doesn't mean that I won't see a way out in the future. I must trust in my future self! I believe my past self to be an arrogant idiot, and my future self will think of me as an idiot! Yet, to make my future self a reality, I must pull through now!'

Sadly, no matter how much Gravis tried to motivate himself, he still felt uncertainty and helplessness deep inside.

'I can't hang onto these feelings of uncertainty right now,' Gravis thought with gritted teeth.

Then, for the first time since he had talked to his mother, Gravis suppressed his emotions again. He knew that this was risky and that it may endanger his eventual future, but if he couldn't access his full power right now, he would never reach this future! For now, he had to return to his old, cold, emotionless self.

Everything came naturally. Unlocking emotions was hard, but if one managed to suppress them once, it came naturally to suppress them again.

Gravis' eyes became cold and emotionless as he glanced at the world.

He didn't care about this dead world.

He didn't care about Heaven.

He didn't care about his friends.

He even didn't care about his children.

Yet, Gravis knew that all the pain would return in the future.

This was only a temporary state of mind, but the longer he remained inside it, the harder it was to get out of it again.