Chapter 365: ONE OF US (2/2)
”MEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOWWWWW!!”
”Rather than feeding him, can someone catch him a female tiger somewhere so that stupid cat can have a girlfriend!!?”
”MEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOWWWWW!!”
”FUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKKKKK!!”
The screams and annoying yowls exchange continued for several hours before Sun Wentai brought a large plate of raw meat to the tiger. Only then, peace returned to the sect once more.
Sun Wentai sighed as he gazed at the tiger cub, who had been eating the food as if his life was depending on it.
”How are you going to survive without food? Tell me, little fatty.”
”NOM-NOM-NOM-Don't call me-NOM-NOM-NOM-fatty!!”
”Don't talk when you're eating.”
”NOM-NOM-NOM-I don't-NOM-NOM-NOM-give a fuck!!”
”…”
Sun Wentai sat on his butt, looking at the guardian beast. He warmly smiled and petted the latter's head, ”Have you chosen your disciple yet? Is there anyone in your eyes this year?”
”NOM-NOM-NOM-Already-NOM-NOM-NOM-done!!”
”Oh? Who have you picked?”
The tiger finished all meat on the plate before him. He licked his right paw and wiped his face with it as he talked, ”The four humans that passed my test – Mao Miaomiao, Zhu Qiao, Gan Xingba, and Zhuo Gongjin.”
Sun Wentai's face changed. He was fine if the tiger picked Zhu Qiao as his successor, but he didn't like the other three.
”Why them?”
”Zhou Gongjin is smart and cunning. He has the potential to become a demon lord if he trains hard enough. Gan Xingba has the right foundation and mindset to practice my techniques, so he should be able to inherit my bloodline. Zhu Qiao is, meh, a succubus. She's already a demon, so my bloodline is compatible with her. As for Mao Miaomiao…”
The tiger paused for a moment. His face was solemn as he thought of the right words to describe Mao Miaomiao. Yet, he couldn't come up with the right explanation.
”That man… is a must.”
”A must? Why him?” Sun Wentai still didn't understand why Miaomiao was necessary since he was an outsider.
”Pfft. Since he fucked your niece, shouldn't you treat him like one of your kind?”
”But why him of all people!?”
”Simple. He's one of ours!”
”Ours?” Sun Wentai's face distorted in disbelief. He thought that the tiger referred to Miaomiao as one of his family members. ”I still don't see him as a relative. He's too selfish and unpredictable. I don't trust him.”
”I don't care about your opinion. He's one of us, period! When everything is over, summon those four to me. I'll give them something, though I already gave one to Zhou Gongjin.”
The tiger snorted and turned his butthole, rubbing Sun Wentai's legs with it.
”…”
Sun Wentai frowned as he looked at the dirty yellowish part on his pants. It felt wet.
Because of the tiger's dirty urine and a portion of his poop, Sun Wentai failed to think or notice the true meaning of the former's words.
…
”ACHOOOOO!!”
”Yikes! Don't sneeze on me! What if you get your COVID on me!?”
”Shut it! We're now in the diseaseless world! Who cares about COVID when you can cultivate!?”
”Sure. When you were at the brothel, I thought you would have caught STD someday. Who would have thought that cultivators don't have any virus on them? Shame! You should have gotten Syphilis at the very least with that amount of pussies you've fucked.”
”Pfft, I'm vaccinated in my previous life. I won't catch it even if STD exists here.”
”Are you sure? I thought you were one of the anti-vaxxors.”
Meanwhile, Miaomiao and Zhu Qiao continued to fly west, bypassing many landmarks and tourist spots. On the way to Siren City, they never stopped dissing or insulting the other.
Miaomiao blew his nose and stopped talking as his right eyebrow twitched.
”Oh boy, here we go again.”
Miaomiao stopped flying. He looked around and examined the area.
They were still in the Central Plains territory, but they had traveled west for hours now. The sun had already set, but they were not anywhere near Siren City.
”What now?” Zhu Qiao also stopped.
”Should we rest and refuel our essence?”
”Hah! You're out of gas, I see.”
”Pfft, I can fly all night, but I want to sleep.”
Zhu Qiao rolled her eyes, ”You still sleep at this stage!? Most 4th-stage cultivators already stop sleeping already. Why do you need sleeping when we can meditate for half an hour, then we are refreshed as if we've slept for days!?”
Miaomiao chuckled as he thought of Xu Chu and his wives, ”Obviously, I need sleep. How can I get wet dreams if I don't sleep?”
”…”
Zhu Qiao was speechless. She shook her head and squeezed her brow.
Arguing with Miaomiao for a day gave her migraines.
Miaomiao pointed south, ”There are several caves down there on that mountain range. I think we can rest for a night.”
”It's one of those mine tunnels, though. Have you forgotten that we're still in the Blind Eagle Mountain Range territory?”
”I thought we left that place long ago.”
”The mountain range still reaches here. Don't underestimate its length.”
Miaomiao stared at the tall mountain range and the hills. Although they had flown all day at a cruising speed, they should have traveled at least 3,000 kilometers by now.
However, for some reason, they hadn't left this territory.
”We traveled north for how many kilometers before we went west?” Miaomiao asked Zhu Qiao for confirmation.
”I don't know either. I just use my eyes and hunch to tell the direction.”
”…”
With a pokerface expression, they looked at each other. In an instant, they came to a conclusion.
”Are we lost?”
”But we kept flying west…”
”When was the last time we checked the direction if we really flew west?”
”…”
”…”
Stupidity wasn't a disease. But when a friend was an idiot, the other friend usually became an idiot, too.