99 Chapter 27 - Australia Day (1/2)

”Back home, this used to be a bit of a controversial party,” Bazza announced, plenty of sausages looted from the Gnomish Butcherhouse sizzling away. ”But not here, because Saturday's are for the boys, no offence to the ladies, and that means every Saturday is Australia day!”

Kenji held his head and groaned.

All around him the party started, mead flowed, meats were served and a wild game of Titanium ping-pong played out. Ellie had brightened after Bazza had fixed her hand with a strange drink and an expensive-looking crystal and now busied herself by dreamily watching Bazza while a large echidna told her all about his rock farm.

”What's wrong mate? Look like your holding a dingo's dick,” said Barry in his butcher's smock, a similar version to the type Ellie had looted from the chest. Actually, Ellie was wearing hers too, her ears bright red with embarrassment.

”I don't know what that means,” Kenji said, ”and would love some help with the rest of this dungeon. How do we even get to the fifth floor from here, and how are you from Earth if your not one of the 18?”

”Mate, have a snag and a tinnie. Then we can talk,” Bazza said, offering Kenji one of the premium-grade sausages from the raid, placed in a sesame seed bun and piled on with fantastically curling vegetables of shifting shades. It kind of looked like a magic onion that was doused with rainbows.

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Sausage in hand, and then handed a beer for the other, Kenji got it over with. He bit down hard and -

”Pah,” Kenji sighed with a great lazy smile, the delicious taste transporting him to a faraway place. The meat was just right, the smell was divine, and the magical onion made him feel uttely relaxed. The stunningly refreshing beer soothed his palate, reset it, and made then next bite doubly wonderful.

Kenji only came too as he finished, and found Bazza smiling like a proud mother hen.

”I'm a good cook, huh?” Bazza smirked, eyeing Kenji's many companions that ate, drank and played as if they hadn't fought in a butchery overflowing with blood and ran by cannibal gnomes.

”Yeah, you really are,” Kenji admitted, relaxing a bit now that some of his pent of stress fading away.

”Care for a game of Titanium ping-pong then?” Bazza handed kenji a paddle heavy as a sword, and soon Kenji found himself on the other side of a Titanium table. ”You better be strong buddy, because even at my absolute weakest I'm a beast in thongs.”

Kenji gulped and served. With Arthur's body, he shot the ping pong ball across, and lightning-fast Bazza smashed it right back in a blur. Kenji rubbed his eyes, peered around, and smirked.

”Well if that's how its going to be,” he said, and turned into the Queen Sun Elf.

”Now that's a sheila,” Bazza wolf whistled, the members of Sundrake bristling. Kenji waved them down.

”Let's try that again,” Kenji said, and served with far greater speed. Bazza effortlessly reutrned it, Kenji smashed it back, their back and forth continueing to increase in speed and power. Using bursts of wind Kenji increased his speed again, he flew back to hit the ping pong ball when it zoomed ridiculously far on the rebournd, and still, Bazza simply continued to move faster and faster.

If only Kenji had Tenko's agility enhancement - Kenji halted, allowing the ball to zoom away.