Part 3 (1/2)
”By Heaven! You care for that fellow still!” he broke out hotly. ”And you had the effrontery to take those solemn words on your lips this morning, with the love of . . . another man in your heart!”
Quita Lenox, whatever her failings, lacked neither spirit nor courage.
She threw back her head, and faced his anger bravely.
”How dare you say such things to me? I . . . don't care for him. I--I hate him!”
”Proof conclusive. Indifference kills hatred. No doubt you wanted to convince yourself, and him, that you were indifferent; and to that end you must needs crucify the first man who comes handy. An admirable sample of feminine justice!”
”Eldred, . . . you have no right to speak like that. I won't hear you.”
”I have every right; and you shall hear me. It was one thing to know that you could not give me all I wanted at the start. One hoped to set that right, in time. But to accept me because another man's defection had piqued your vanity, . . . G.o.d knows how you could dare to do it!
I see now why you found me unlike an ordinary lover. No doubt that other fellow--curse him--took full advantage of his privileged position: while to me you seemed a thing so sacred that I hardly dared lay a hand on you. I might have known that a man who is fool enough to put a woman on a pedestal, is bound to pay a long price for his folly.”
He was las.h.i.+ng himself more mercilessly than he lashed her: and in the torment of his spirit he did not pause to consider the possible effect of his words on a recklessly impulsive woman.
”Really . . . you are insufferable!” she retorted, her breath coming short and quick. ”I have a little pride also; and you had better stop before you push me too far. For I tell you frankly, I don't care enough for you to stand this sort of treatment at your hands.”
The counter-stroke stung like a lash. The lines about his mouth hardened, and he straightened himself sharply.
”Pity you were not more frank with me twenty-four hours ago. Then we might both have been spared this morning's ironical service. However, the thing is done now. . . .”
”Indeed, it's not done!” she flashed out defiantly. ”I have no notion of being your wife on sufferance, I a.s.sure you. We are only on the threshold as yet. We need not go a step farther unless we choose. And after what you have said to me, . . . I do not choose.”
For an instant the man was stunned into silence; then, in a desperate impulse, took a step towards her.
”Quita, . . . you don't realise what you are saying? Nothing can alter the fact that we are man and wife, now and always.”
She motioned him from her with an imperious gesture.
”Don't touch me, please. I do realise, perfectly, that we are not free to make any more dangerous experiments. But we are at least free to live and work independently of one another. Of course I know that you can compel me to remain with you,”--her colour deepened on the words.--”But I know also that you have too much chivalry, too much pride, to force yourself upon me against my wish.”
”By G.o.d, yes!” he answered from between his teeth. ”And . . . what is your wish, may I ask?”
For the first time she hesitated, and lowered her eyes.
”I believe our wishes are identical,” she said.
”No need to trouble about mine. You can put them out of court altogether.”
His tone spurred her to instant decision.
”My wish is to go back to Zermatt at once, by the funicular; and . . .
that we should not see one another again. I will accept nothing from you. I can earn my own living, as I have done till now. Thank G.o.d, Michael is too blessedly Bohemian to make a fuss, or be horrified at things. He will simply be overjoyed to get me back.”
She turned from him hastily; and he stood, like a man paralysed, watching her go. On the threshold of the bedroom door she looked back.
”Don't think of writing to me, or of trying to patch up a reconciliation between us,” she said on a softened note. ”Mended things are never reliable. I can neither forget nor forgive what you have said to me to-day, and when you have had time to think things over, you will probably feel thankful that I had the courage to leave you.”