Part 90 (1/2)
Opening the door, both paused at the threshold, and neither could ever forget the picture she represented.
In a snowy _peignoir_, she sat on the side of the couch, with her long waving hair falling in disorder to the marble floor, and seemed indeed like j.a.phet's ”Amarant”:
”She in her locks is like the travelling sun, Setting, all clad in coifing clouds of gold.”
The wan Phidian face was turned toward them, and was breathless in its anxious eagerly questioning expression. Her brown eyes widened, searching theirs; and reading all, in her daughter's tearful pitying gaze, what a wild look crossed her face!
Regina pushed her uncle back, closed the door and sprang to the couch, holding out the letters.
Sitting as still as stone, Mrs. Laurance did not appear to notice them.
”Darling mother, G.o.d knows what is best for us all.”
Slowly the strained eyes turned to the appealing face of her kneeling child, and something there broke up the frozen deeps of her heart.
”Are you sure? Is there no hope?”
”No hope; except to meet him in heaven.”
Throwing her hands above her head, the wretched woman wrung them despairingly, and the pain of all the bitter past wailed in her pa.s.sionate cry:
”Lost for ever! And I would not forgive him! My husband! My own husband! When he begged for pardon I spurned, and derided, and taunted him! Oh! I meant sometime to forgive him; after I had accomplished all I planned. After he was beggared, and humiliated in the eyes of the world, and that woman occupied the position where they all sought to keep me, a mother and yet no lawful wife, after I had enjoyed my triumph a little while, I fully intended to listen to my heart long enough to tell him that I forgave him because he was your father! And now, where is my revenge? Where is my triumph? G.o.d has turned His back upon me; has struck from my hands all that I have toiled for fifteen years to accomplish. They all triumph over me now, in their quiet graves, resting in peace; and I live, only to regret!
To regret!”
Her eyes were dry, and shone like jewels, and when her arms fell, her clenched hands rested unintentionally on her daughter's head.
”Mother, he knows now that you forgive him. Remember that for him all grief is ended; and try to be comforted.”
”And for me? What remains for me?”
Her voice was so deep, so sepulchral, so despairing, that Regina clung closer to her.
”Your child, who loves you so devotedly; and the hope of that blessed rest in heaven, where marriages are unknown, where at last we shall all dwell together in peace.”
For some time Mrs. Laurance remained motionless; then her lips moved inaudibly. At length she said:
”Yes, my child, our child is all that is left. When he asked to kiss me once more, I denied him so harshly, so bitterly! When he tried to draw me for the last time to his bosom, I hurled away his arms, would not let him touch me. Now I shall never see him again. My husband!
The one only love of my miserable and accursed life! Oh, my beloved!
do you know at last, that the Minnie of your youth, the bride of your boyhood has never, never ceased to love her faithless, erring husband?”
Her voice grew tremulous, husky, and suddenly bending back her daughter's head, she looked long at the grieved countenance.
”His last words were: 'Minnie love, let our baby's eyes and lips plead pardon for her father's unintentional sins.' They do; they always shall. Cuthbert's own wonderful eyes s.h.i.+ning in his daughter's. My husband's own proud beautiful lips that kiss me so fondly every time I press his child's mouth! At last I can thank G.o.d that our baby is indeed her father's image; and because in death Cuthbert is my own again, I can cherish the memory, and pray for the soul of my husband! Kiss me, kiss me--oh, my darling!”
She kissed the girl's eyes and lips, held her off, gazing into her face through gathering mist, then drew her again to her bosom, and the long h.o.a.rded bitterness and agony found vent in a storm of sobs and tears.
”I must sit joyless in my place; bereft As trees that suddenly have dropped their leaves, And dark as nights that have no moon.”