Part 12 (1/2)
”What happened to her?”
I'm about to tell him, but I stop myself, suddenly remembering that I'm talking to one of the Unchanged. Don't want him to know she's the reason I came back to the city.
”Her mother took her,” I answer, spitting out the words. He nods slowly, trying to make it look like he understands.
”Must be hard to deal with,” he says. ”I mean, I thought I'd had it bad, but at least I know what happened to my family. I know they're both dead and I've had closure, but you, you don't have a clue where any of them are or even if they're still alive.”
”I should have killed them,” I say again.
”I can't begin to imagine what you've been through. The realization you were a killer must have been hard enough. How did they get away?”
”I was disoriented. I'd kill them in a heartbeat if they were here now.”
”You didn't kill me.”
”No, but I-”
”You're from around here, right?” he interrupts.
”Depends where here is.”
”What about the other two kids?”
”Two boys. One older, one younger than my girl.”
”Really tough,” he says quietly, shaking his head and rinsing his b.l.o.o.d.y mouth out again. ”So how have you coped?”
Is he mocking me now?
”I've killed as many of you f.u.c.kers as I've been able to find,” I answer, feeling my body start to tense up again.
”Except me.”
”There's still time...”
”Okay,” he says quickly, leaning back and looking up at the ceiling, ”but has it actually helped? Has it got you any closer to getting your daughter back? I presume that's what you were heading back to the city for?”
Christ, I have to give him his due, he's good. That one came from out of nowhere.
”I'll find her if it's the last thing I do.”
”That's good.”
”Is it?”
He nods his head vigorously. ”Of course it is. It shows there's more to you than just wanting to fight and kill all the time. You still give a d.a.m.n about your daughter, and that means you've still got a chance. Honestly, Danny, most of the people like you who come through here are complete no-hopers, only interested in killing. You, you're different. You're thinking further ahead than the next battle.”
”Doesn't mean I won't fight. Doesn't mean I won't still kill you.”
”Of course not, but from where I'm sitting, killing me would be the worst thing you could do. How would it help? Like I said earlier, you'd just be fighting fire with fire. Just stop for a second and work your way back, Danny. Think about everything that's happened to you to bring you to this point. The Hate has taken everything you ever had. It's stripped you of your soul and your ident.i.ty. It's stopped you functioning as a human being.”
”It hasn't. I know exactly-”
”You've lost everything because of it ... your family, your home, your daughter. If it wasn't for the Hate you might still be with her now. Christ, man, it's even cost you your dignity and your freedom. You've spent the last two days lying in a bed of your own p.i.s.s, tied up and caged like an animal. And at this precise moment in time, you're close to losing control of your future, too. If I wanted to I could walk out of here right now and not look back. I could leave you here alone to starve and die. You don't know where you are, how many other people are here, what's on the other side of the door to this room ... Face it, Danny, right now all you have is me.”
He stops talking and waits for me to respond, but I can't. All I can do is stare back at his barely human face. Is he right? He shuffles forward until he's just within reach. Is he taunting me? Testing me?
”People tell me I'm wasting my time with your type. They tell me you're no better than animals, that you've got dog blood running through your veins and you should be rounded up and shot.”
”I don't care what they-”
”You know what I tell them? I tell them they're wrong. But you're the only one who can really decide who's right. If the boot was on the other foot and I was your prisoner, Danny, what would you do now?”
”I'd-”
”Stupid question. We'd have never got to this stage. You'd already have killed me. You could do it now if you want to, but I think you're better than that.”
He moves forward again. I move to scratch the stabbing itch by my right knee, which has just returned, and he flinches. He's trembling. Is this just part of the act, or is his fear genuine?
”Cooperate with me and prove the rest of them wrong. Show me you can control your emotions and I'll help you. I can get access to records. I could try to find out what happened to your daughter.”
That doesn't ring true at all. It smacks of desperation, and he knows it.
”Bulls.h.i.+t.”
He shrugs his shoulders. ”It might be, but what have I got to gain? More to the point, what have you got to lose?”
Head's spinning. Can't take all this in. Can't think straight. My heart says kill, but something's telling me to wait because he's right, fighting has got me nowhere. And if there's even the slightest chance he'll be able to help me, should I take it? He leans back and picks up the keys. He takes one of the keys off the ring and throws it over to me.
”For the chains around your wrists,” he says. ”Take them off and finish getting dressed.”
I do as he says, stretching my arms and flexing my muscles. The freedom feels good after endless hours of being wrapped in chains. I walk back across the room to the pile of clothes. All the time, Joseph stays seated on the floor. He's within the reach of the chains around my waist. We both know I could kill him if I wanted to. He's terrified, I can see it in his eyes, and that gives me strength to hold my nerve. I hold the Hate.
Maybe I'll give him a chance. If he lets me down, I'll kill him.
v THE TORRENTIAL RAINS WERE unexpected, weather forecasts a long-forgotten luxury. The flash floods wreaked unprecedented destruction on the city center refugee camp and its densely packed population. Those living out on the streets bore the brunt of the pain as almost a month's worth of rain fell in less than two hours, literally was.h.i.+ng away scores of people and their few remaining belongings. Blocked and broken drains stopped the water from draining away, transforming many streets and pavements into stagnant lakes. The bas.e.m.e.nts and ground floors of countless buildings flooded. Almost half of the military base in the munic.i.p.al park was washed away, with a huge number of refugee-occupied tents being lost. Then, to add insult to injury, as quickly as the rains came, they disappeared. Thankfully the sun remained hidden behind a layer of heavy cloud for most of the day, but the summer heat and a few sharp bursts of sunlight were enough to dry out and bake the bedraggled world below. Every outdoor surface was caked in a layer of foul-smelling mud, a grubby tidemark on building walls a grim reminder of how high the floodwaters had climbed. Huge mountains of rain-soaked garbage and waste began to ferment, the insect population feeding on them seeming to multiply by the hour. unexpected, weather forecasts a long-forgotten luxury. The flash floods wreaked unprecedented destruction on the city center refugee camp and its densely packed population. Those living out on the streets bore the brunt of the pain as almost a month's worth of rain fell in less than two hours, literally was.h.i.+ng away scores of people and their few remaining belongings. Blocked and broken drains stopped the water from draining away, transforming many streets and pavements into stagnant lakes. The bas.e.m.e.nts and ground floors of countless buildings flooded. Almost half of the military base in the munic.i.p.al park was washed away, with a huge number of refugee-occupied tents being lost. Then, to add insult to injury, as quickly as the rains came, they disappeared. Thankfully the sun remained hidden behind a layer of heavy cloud for most of the day, but the summer heat and a few sharp bursts of sunlight were enough to dry out and bake the bedraggled world below. Every outdoor surface was caked in a layer of foul-smelling mud, a grubby tidemark on building walls a grim reminder of how high the floodwaters had climbed. Huge mountains of rain-soaked garbage and waste began to ferment, the insect population feeding on them seeming to multiply by the hour.
Constant helicopter patrols continued to police the border and the exclusion zone. All scheduled missions outside the city were temporarily abandoned as, for once, the already severely depleted military forces turned their attention to the thousands of people supposedly in their care. Their orders were simple: Get as many people off the streets as possible (living or dead), then clear the major routes through town.
Ahead of the motley collection of vehicles that crawled slowly along Arley Road, groups of soldiers on foot moved from building to building through the early evening darkness. One of the snowplow-fitted trucks was used to clear a route through, pus.h.i.+ng tons of sodden waste toward the gutter and leaving a noxious, three-foot-high drift of garbage in its wake. Hazmat-suited soldiers followed it along the freshly sc.r.a.ped pavement, pulling corpses from the mire and loading them into the backs of the yellow refuse and recycling trucks that had been recently commandeered from the now-dissolved city council.
A group of three soldiers emerged from a building that had once been a large house but in more recent years had been converted into office s.p.a.ce. By flashlight, one of them spray-painted a simple message onto the brick wall beside the door, a message for those who followed.
37 INSIDE.