Part 54 (1/2)
”First of all...First of all, he is your child. That's the first thing I know about him, that's the first thing I think about him.”
”Yes.”
”That's what I always think about him: that he's yours, with your light and your goodness, and the things you've always given him, his whole life, the way you know how to give. Your abundance, your love, and your generosity, always. And that is what will protect him everywhere, there, too.”
”It will?”
”Yes, yes.” Avram looks beyond her and presses her limp body to him. She feels cold, and her breath is shallow.
”Tell me more, I need you to tell me.”
”And you let me hold him together with you. That's what it is. That's what I see. Yes.”
Her face grows distant and weak. She seems to be falling asleep with her eyes open, in his arms, and he wants to wake her, to breathe life into her. But something about her, something in her vacant gaze, her gaping mouth ...
”And it's like,” Avram struggles, ”like you're trying to take him with you somewhere, alone, but he's too heavy for you. And he's asleep the whole time, right?”
Ora nods, understanding yet not understanding. Her fingers move, weak and blind on his forearm, distractedly feeling the edge of his sleeve.
”It's like he's been anesthetized,” Avram murmurs. ”I don't know why, I don't fully understand it. And then you come to me and ask me to help you.”
”Yes,” she whispers.
”The two of us have to take him somewhere, I don't know where, I don't understand why. And we hold him together, between us, all the time. It's like he needs both of us to take him there, that's it.”
”Yes.”
”Only the two of us can take him there.”
”Where?”
”I don't know.”
”What's there?”
”I don't know.”
”Is it good?” Ora rustles desperately. ”Is it a good place there?”
”I don't know.”
”What is this, what are you telling me? Is this a dream you had? Did you dream about him?”
”It's what I see,” Avram replies helplessly.
”But what is it?”
”We're both holding him.”
”Yes?”
”He's walking between us.”
”Yes, that's good.”
”But he's asleep, his eyes are closed, one of his arms is on you and the other on me.”
”I don't understand.”
Suddenly Avram shakes himself off. ”Let's get out of here, Ora.”
She moans. ”This isn't good. He has to be awake the whole time. Why is he sleeping?”
”No, he's asleep. His head is on your shoulder.”
”But why is he asleep?” Ora shouts and her voice cracks.
Avram shuts his eyes to wipe the scene away. When he opens them, Ora is staring at him in horror.
”Maybe we were wrong,” she says, and her face is strained. ”Maybe we got it all wrong, from the beginning. This whole path, all the walking we did-”
”That's not true! Don't say that, we'll walk, and we'll talk about him-”