Part 2 (1/2)
”You can be a.s.sistant b-business manager,” says Mark.
”a.s.sistant?” says I. ”Who's the real thing?”
”Me,” says Mark.
”Huh!” says I.
”You're a reporter, too,” says he. ”You and Plunk and T-Tallow.”
”What's my job?” says Tallow.
”You're a-a-a.s.sistant foreman of the pressroom,” says Mark.
”Huh! Who's foreman?”
”Me,” says Mark.
”What job have you got that I can be a.s.sistant to?” says Plunk.
”You're a.s.sistant circulation manager,” says he.
”All we got to do is be those things you've said, and reporters besides?” says I.
”That, and hustle for ads., and help run the press, and fold papers, and learn to set type, and clean up, and help l-l-lick folks that come in to l-lick the editor, and run the job press, and collect money, and get subscribers, and d-d-drum up printin' jobs. When you hain't got anythin'
else to d-do, you can be l-lookin' for news.”
”Too much loafin' about this to suit me,” says Tallow.
”Say,” says Plunk, ”how _does_ a newspaper make money, anyhow?”
”It d-don't,” says Mark. ”Anyhow old Rogers always said so; but it t-tries to make money by gettin' folks to subscribe, and by havin'
f-folks advertise, and by doin' printin' jobs-like tickets for the Congregational Young Ladies' Auxiliary Annual Chicken-Pie Supper.”
”How many subscribers did the _Trumpet_ have when it busted?” says I.
”Hunderd and t-twenty-six,” says Mark. ”And listen to this, you f-fellows, we've got to have a thousand.”
”Huh!” says I. ”You'll have to git a few dozen fam'lies to move in first.”
”Yes,” says Plunk, ”and about that type-settin'-who's goin' to teach it to us?”
Mark scratched his head at that. Who _was_ going to teach us how to do it? But that was a worry that didn't last long. We found a bridge to cross that difficulty and the name of it was Tec.u.mseh Androcles Spat. He came in through the door that very minute.
He looked like Abraham Lincoln in his s.h.i.+rtsleeves. Tall he was, and bony, and he hadn't any coat on, and he did have one of those old flat-brimmed silk hats.
He looked at us a moment and then says:
”Do I find myself standing in the editorial sanctum of one of those bulwarks of liberty and free speech-the local newspaper?”
”Right on the edge of it,” says Mark.