Part 2 (2/2)

Being come to our lodgings, there was such baking, boiling, roasting, and stewing, as if Cook Ruffian had been there to have scalded the devil in his feathers: and after supper a fire of fir-wood as high as an indifferent May-pole: for I a.s.sure you, that the Earl of _Mar_ will give any man that is his friend, for thanks, as many fir trees (that are as good as any s.h.i.+p's masts in England) as are worth if they were in any place near the Thames, or any other portable river) the best earldom in England or Scotland either: For I dare affirm, he hath as many growing there, as would serve for masts (from this time to the end of the world) for all the s.h.i.+ps, caracks, hoys, galleys, boats, drumlers, barks, and water-crafts, that are now, or can be in the world these forty years.

This sounds like a lie to an unbeliever; but I and many thousands do know that I speak within the compa.s.s of truth: for indeed (the more is the pity) they do grow so far from any pa.s.sage of water, and withal in such rocky mountains, that no way to convey them is possible to be pa.s.sable, either with boat, horse, or cart.

Thus having spent certain days in hunting in the Brae of _Mar_, we went to the next county called _Badenoch_, belonging to the Earl of _Enzie_, where having such sport and entertainment as we formerly had; after four or five days pastime, we took leave of hunting for that year; and took our journey toward a strong house of the Earl's, called _Ruthven_ in _Badenoch_, where my Lord of _Enzie_ and his n.o.ble Countess (being daughter to the Earl of _Argyle_) did give us most n.o.ble welcome three days.

From thence we went to a place called _Balloch Castle_,[25] a fair and stately house, a worthy gentleman being the owner of it, called the Laird of _Grant_; his wife being a gentlewoman honourably descended being sister to the right Honourable Earl of _Athol_, and to Sir _Patrick Murray_ Knight; she being both inwardly and outwardly plentifully adorned with the gifts of grace and nature: so that our cheer was more than sufficient; and yet much less than they could afford us. There stayed there four days, four Earls, one Lord, divers Knights and Gentlemen, and their servants, footmen and horses; and every meal four long tables furnished with all varieties: our first and second course being three score dishes at one board; and after that always a banquet: and there if I had not forsworn wine till I came to _Edinburgh_ I think I had there drunk my last.

The fifth day with much ado we gate from thence to _Tarnaway_, a goodly house of the Earl of _Murrays_,[26] where that Right Honourable Lord and his Lady did welcome us four days more. There was good cheer in all variety, with somewhat more than plenty for advantage: for indeed the County of _Murray_ is the most pleasantest and plentiful country in all _Scotland_; being plain land, that a coach may be driven more than four and thirty miles one way in it, alongst by the sea-coast.

From thence I went to _Elgin_ in _Murray_,[27] an ancient City, where there stood a fair and beautiful church with three steeples, the walls of it and the steeples all yet standing; but the roofs, windows, and many marble monuments and tombs of honourable and worthy personages all broken and defaced: this was done in the time when ruin bare rule, and Knox knocked down churches.

From _Elgin_ we went to the Bishop of _Murray_ his house which is called _Spiny_, or _Spinay_: a Reverend Gentleman he is, of the n.o.ble name of _Douglas_, where we were very well welcomed, as befitted the honour of himself and his guests.

From thence we departed to the Lord Marquess of _Huntlys_ to a sumptuous house of his, named the _Bog of Geethe_, where our entertainment was like himself, free, bountiful and honourable. There (after two days stay) with much entreaty and earnest suit, I gate leave of the Lords to depart towards _Edinburgh_: the n.o.ble Marquess, the Earl of _Mar_, _Murray_, _Enzie_, _Buchan_, and the Lord _Erskine_; all these, I thank them, gave me gold to defray my charges in my journey.

So after five and thirty days hunting and travel I returning, past by another stately mansion of the Lord Marquesses, called _Stroboggy_, and so over _Carny_ mount to _Brechin_, where a wench that was born deaf and dumb came into my chamber at midnight (I being asleep) and she opening the bed, would feign have lodged with me: but had I been a _Sardanapalus_, or a _Heliogabulus_, I think that either the great travel over the mountains had tamed me; or if not, her beauty could never have moved me. The best parts of her were, that her breath was as sweet as sugar-candian,[28] being very well shouldered beneath the waste; and as my hostess told me the next morning, that she had changed her maiden-head for the price of a b.a.s.t.a.r.d not long before. But howsoever, she made such a hideous noise, that I started out of my sleep, and thought that the Devil had been there: but I no sooner knew who it was, but I arose, and thrust my dumb beast out of my chamber; and for want of a lock or a latch, I staked up my door with a great chair.

Thus having escaped one of the seven deadly sins as at _Brechin_, I departed from thence to a town called _Forfor_; and from thence to _Dundee_, and so to _Kinghorn_, _Burntisland_, and so to _Edinburgh_, where I stayed eight days, to recover myself of falls and bruises, which I received in my travel in the Highland mountainous hunting. Great welcome I had showed me all my stay at _Edinburgh_, by many worthy gentlemen, namely, old Master _George Todrigg_, Master _Henry Livingston_, Master _James Henderson_, Master _John Maxwell_, and a number of others, who suffered me to want no wine or good cheer, as may be imagined.

Now the day before I came from _Edinburgh_, I went to _Leith_, where I found my long approved and a.s.sured good friend Master _Benjamin Jonson_, at one Master _John Stuarts_ house; I thank him for his great kindness towards me: for at my taking leave of him, he gave me a piece of gold of two and twenty s.h.i.+llings[29] to drink his health in _England_. And withal, willed me to remember his kind commendations to all his friends: So with a friendly farewell, I left him as well, as I hope never to see him in a worse estate: for he is amongst n.o.blemen and gentlemen that know his true worth, and their own honours, where, with much respective love he is worthily entertained.

So leaving _Leith_ I returned to _Edinburgh_, and within the port or gate, called the _Nether-Bow_, I discharged my pockets of all the money I had: and as I came pennyless within the walls of that city at my first coming thither; so now at my departing from thence, I came moneyless out of it again; having in company to convey me out, certain gentlemen, amongst the which Master _James Acherson_, Laird of _Gasford_, a gentleman that brought me to his house, where with great entertainment he and his good wife did welcome me.

On the morrow he sent one of his men to bring me to a place called _Adam_, to Master _John Acmootye_ his house, one of the Grooms of his Majesty's Bed-chamber; where with him and his two brethren, Master _Alexander_, and Master _James Acmootye_, I found both cheer and welcome, not inferior to any that I had had in any former place.

Amongst our viands that we had there, I must not forget the Sole and Goose (_sic_), a most delicate fowl, which breeds in great abundance in a little rock called the _Ba.s.s_, which stands two miles into the sea. It is very good flesh, but it is eaten in the form as we eat oysters, standing at a side-board, a little before dinner, unsanctified without grace; and after it is eaten, it must be well liquored with two or three good rouses[30] of sherry or canary sack. The Lord or owner of the _Ba.s.s_ doth profit at the least two hundred pound yearly by those geese; the _Ba.s.s_ itself being of a great height, and near three quarters of a mile in compa.s.s, all fully replenished with wild fowl, having but one small entrance into it, with a house, a garden, and a chapel in it; and on the top of it a well of pure fresh water.

From _Adam_, Master _John_ and Master _James Acmootye_ went to the town of _Dunbar_ with me, where ten Scottish pints of wine were consumed, and brought to nothing for a farewell: there at Master _James Baylies_ house I took leave, and Master _James Acmootye_ coming for _England_, said, that if I would ride with, that neither I nor my horse should want betwixt that place and _London_. Now I having no money nor means for travel, began at once to examine my manners and my want: at last my want persuaded my manners to accept of this worthy gentleman's undeserved courtesy. So that night he brought me to a place called _c.o.c.kburnspath_, where we lodged at an inn, the like of which I dare say, is not in any of his Majesty's Dominions. And for to show my thankfulness to Master _William Arnot_ and his wife, the owners thereof, I must explain their bountiful entertainment of guests, which is this:

Suppose ten, fifteen, or twenty men and horses come to lodge at their house, the men shall have flesh, tame and wild fowl, fish with all variety of good cheer, good lodging, and welcome; and the horses shall want neither hay or provender: and at the morning at their departure the reckoning is just nothing. This is this worthy gentlemen's use, his chief delight being only to give strangers entertainment _gratis_: and I am sure, that in _Scotland_ beyond _Edinburgh_, I have been at houses like castles for building; the master of the house his beaver being his blue bonnet, one that will wear no other s.h.i.+rts, but of the flax that grows on his own ground, and of his wife's, daughters', or servants'

spinning; that hath his stockings, hose, and jerkin of the wool of his own sheep's backs; that never (by his pride of apparel) caused mercer, draper, silk-man, embroiderer, or haberdasher to break and turn bankrupt: and yet this plain home-spun fellow keeps and maintains thirty, forty, fifty servants, or perhaps, more, every day relieving three or fourscore poor people at his gate; and besides all this, can give n.o.ble entertainment for four or five days together to five or six earls and lords, besides knights, gentlemen and their followers, if they be three or four hundred men, and horse of them, where they shall not only feed but feast, and not feast but banquet, this is a man that desires to know nothing so much, as his duty to G.o.d and his King, whose greatest cares are to practise the works of piety, charity, and hospitality: he never studies the consuming art of fas.h.i.+onless fas.h.i.+ons, he never tries his strength to bear four or five hundred acres on his back at once, his legs are always at liberty, not being fettered with golden garters, and manacled with artificial roses, whose weight (sometime) is the last reliques of some decayed Lords.h.i.+p: Many of these worthy housekeepers there are in _Scotland_, amongst some of them I was entertained; from whence I did truly gather these aforesaid observations.

So leaving _c.o.c.kburnspath_, we rode to _Berwick_, where the worthy old Soldier and ancient Knight, Sir _William Bowyer_, made me welcome, but contrary to his will, we lodged at an Inn, where Master _James Acmootye_ paid all charges: but at _Berwick_ there was a grievous chance happened, which I think not fit the relation to be omitted.

In the river of _Tweed_, which runs by _Berwick_, are taken by fishermen that dwell there, infinite numbers of fresh salmons, so that many households and families are relieved by the profit of that fis.h.i.+ng; but (how long since I know not) there was an order that no man or boy whatsoever should fish upon a Sunday: this order continued long amongst them, till some eight or nine weeks before Michaelmas last, on a Sunday, the salmons played in such great abundance in the river, that some of the fishermen (contrary to G.o.d's law and their own order) took boats and nets and fished, and caught near three hundred salmons; but from that time until Michaelmas day that I was there, which was nine weeks, and heard the report of it, and saw the poor people's miserable lamentations, they had not seen one salmon in the river; and some of them were in despair that they should never see any more there; affirming it to be G.o.d's judgment upon them for the profanation of the Sabbath.

The thirtieth of September we rode from _Berwick_ to _Belford_ from _Belford_ to _Alnwick_, the next day from _Alnwick_ to _Newcastle_, where I found the n.o.ble Knight, Sir _Henry Witherington_; who, because I would have no gold nor silver, gave me a bay mare, in requital of a loaf of bread that I had given him two and twenty years before, at the Island of _Flores_, of the which I have spoken before. I overtook at _Newcastle_ a great many of my worthy friends, which were all coming for _London_, namely, Master _Robert Hay_, and Master _David Drummond_, where I was welcomed at Master _Nicholas Tempests_ house. From _Newcastle_ I rode with those gentlemen to _Durham_, to _Darlington_, to _Northallerton_, and to _Topcliffe_ in _Yorks.h.i.+re_, where I took my leave of them, and would needs try my pennyless fortunes by myself, and see the city of _York_, where I was lodged at my right wors.h.i.+pful good friend, Master Doctor _Hudson_ one of his Majesty's chaplains, who went with me, and shewed me the goodly Minster Church there, and the most admirable, rare-wrought, unfellowed[31] chapter house.

From _York_ I rode to _Doncaster_, where my horses were well fed at the Bear, but myself found out the honorable Knight, Sir _Robert Anstruther_ at his father-in-law's, the truly n.o.ble Sir _Robert Swifts_ house, he being then High Sheriff of _Yorks.h.i.+re_, where with their good Ladies, and the right Honourable the Lord _Sanquhar_, I was stayed two nights and one day, Sir _Robert Anstruther_ (I thank him) not only paying for my two horses' meat, but at my departure, he gave me a letter to _Newark_ upon _Trent_, twenty eight miles in my way, where Master _George Atkinson_ mine host made me as welcome, as if I had been a French Lord, and what was to be paid, as I called for nothing, I paid as much; and left the reckoning with many thanks to Sir _Robert Anstruther_.

So leaving _Newark_, with another gentleman that overtook me, we came at night to _Stamford_, to the sign of the Virginity (or the Maidenhead) where I delivered a letter from the Lord _Sanquhar_; which caused Master _Bates_ and his wife, being the master and mistress of the house, to make me and the gentleman that was with me great cheer for nothing.

From _Stamford_ the next day we rode to _Huntington_, where we lodged at the Postmaster's house, at the sign of the Crown; his name is _Riggs_.

He was informed who I was, and wherefore I undertook this my pennyless progress: wherefore he came up to our chamber, and supped with us, and very bountifully called for three quarts of wine and sugar, and four jugs of beer. He did drink and begin healths like a horse-leech and swallowed down his cups without feeling, as if he had had the dropsy, or nine pound of sponge in his maw. In a word, as he is a post, he drank post, striving and calling by all means to make the reckoning great, or to make us men of great reckoning. But in his payment he was tired like a jade, leaving the gentleman that was with me to discharge the terrible shot, or else one of my horses must have lain in p.a.w.n for his superfluous calling, and unmannerly intrusion.

But leaving him, I left _Huntington_, and rode on the Sunday to _Puckeridge_, where Master _Holland_ at the Falcon, (mine old acquaintance) and my loving and ancient host gave me, my friend, my man, and our horses excellent cheer, and welcome, and I paid him with, not a penny of money.

The next day I came to _London_, and obscurely coming within Moorgate, I went to a house and borrowed money: and so I stole back again to _Islington_, to the sign of the Maidenhead,[32] staying till Wednesday, that my friends came to meet me, who knew no other, but that Wednesday was my first coming; where with all love I was entertained with much good cheer: and after supper we had a play of the Life and Death of _Guy of Warwick_,[33] played by the Right Honourable the Earl of _Derby_ his men. And so on the Thursday morning being the fifteenth of October, I came home to my house in _London_.

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