Part 49 (1/2)

”Do! I'll do anything,” he cried.

”I'm going down to the library,” I said; ”will you go and tell my mother to come there? but don't tell her it is I who want to see her.

Simply say that a stranger is asking for her.”

I found my way into the library. Candles which cast a flickering light were placed on the table, making the room ghostly enough.

How well I remembered the old place, and how memory after memory came back to me as I waited there. I often thought of the time my father had led me there on my fifteenth birthday, and told me of the curse of my race, and many other things which seemed to have cast a shadow over my life. Then I thought of how terribly his words had been fulfilled.

The story of the curse was no meaningless jargon. It contained awful truths, which had been fulfilled in me. And yet I was not sure.

Perhaps what had happened was the simple outcome of broken laws; perhaps Trewinion's curse was an old wives' fable. Still, the truth that my life was cursed was ever before me. I felt that even then I was, humanly speaking, branded with the hand of Cain. G.o.d had forgiven me, but man never would; the sin of my life could only be wiped out by yielding myself up to the hands of justice.

And this I had come home to do. I was waiting there to tell my mother that I had murdered her dearest son, that I had taken all joy and brightness from her life, and then, having brought the greatest sorrow a son can bring upon a mother, I would go to meet my righteous judgment.

Presently I heard the sound of footsteps, and soon my mother entered the room.

I had no difficulty in recognising her. Ten years had worked but little change in her appearance. Certainly her hair was tinged with grey, and the lines on her face were deeper, but otherwise there was no difference. There was still the cold expression--which was ever the same, except when her eyes rested on Wilfred--still the same stately carriage.

She glanced at me for a second, and then asked my business.

”Mother,” I said, standing up.

She looked at me keenly for a few seconds, then she cried hoa.r.s.ely, ”My G.o.d, what brought you here?”

”Mother, forgive me,” I said.

I thought she recoiled from me as if in abhorrence. I know that she stepped back from me.

”Why have you come?” she said, and I saw fierce hate gleaming from her eyes. ”Have you not caused misery enough? Are you not content with the lives you have poisoned? You went away; why did you ever come back?”

”I could not rest, mother,” I said, humbly, for I felt I deserved her reproach. ”I wanted to tell you all; I wanted your forgiveness.”

”Tell me!” she cried, ”as though I did not know. Forgive you, how can I forgive you when but for you my boy might have been----”

”Let me tell you everything, mother,” I cried. ”G.o.d knows I have suffered much for what I have done, but He has forgiven me, and I wanted your forgiveness before I die.”

”Do I not know? Have I not heard?” she went on. ”Has it not been the talk of the neighbourhood? Have you not ever been my son's enemy?

When you were children it was you who had your father's affections, it was you who saved the life of the only one my Wilfred loved, it was you who stood between Wilfred and his right position. It was you who kept Ruth from loving him, and although you went away you were ever the black blot on his life. And now you have come back again. Why? To breathe more poison, to carry out more of your murderous designs.”

”No, mother, I have come to atone for the wrong I have done rather than to do more wrong.”

”That can never be. You can never atone for the wrong you have done.

You were born to curse my son's life, and you have done it. You have stripped my life of happiness, and now you come again, to take away what paltry right, I suppose, you claim.”

”But, mother!”

”Call me not 'mother,' you are no son of mine.”

”Not your son!” I cried, ”how can that be?”