Part 38 (1/2)

The carrier, having set up his horses, went with the la.s.ses to the Eagle in Westminster, and told the landlady he had brought her three fine Lancas.h.i.+re la.s.ses; and seeing she often asked him to get her a maid, she might now take her choice. ”Marry,” said she, ”I want one at present, and here are three gentlemen who shall give their opinions.” As soon as Meg came in they blessed themselves, crying,

”Domine, Domine, viee Originem.”

So her mistress demanded what was her name. ”Margaret, forsooth,” said she briskly. ”And what work can you do?” She answered she had not been bred unto her needle, but to hard labour, as was.h.i.+ng, brewing, and baking, and could make a house clean. ”Thou art,” quoth the hostess, ”a l.u.s.ty wench, and I like thee well, for I have often persons that will not pay.” ”Mistress,” said she, ”if any such come let me know, and I'll make them pay I'll engage.” ”Nay, this is true,” said the carrier, ”for my carcase felt it;” and then he told them how she served him. On this Sir John de Castile, in a bravado, would needs make an experiment of her vast strength; and asked her ”if she durst exchange a box o' the ear with him.” ”Yes,” quoth she, ”if my mistress will give me leave.” This granted, she stood to receive Sir John's blow, who gave her a box with all his might, but it stirred her not at all; but Meg gave him such a memorandum on his ear that Sir John fell down at her feet. ”By my faith,” said another, ”she strikes a blow like an ox, for she hath knocked down an a.s.s.” So Meg was taken into service.

CHAPTER III.

_The method Meg took to make one of the Vicars pay his Score._

Meg so bestirred herself that she pleased her mistress, and for her tallness was called Long Meg of Westminster.

One of the lubbers of the Abbey had a mind to try her strength, so, coming with six of his a.s.sociates one frosty morning, calls for a pot of ale, which, being drank, he asked what he owed. To which Meg answers, ”Five s.h.i.+llings and threepence.”

”O thou foul scullion, I owe thee but three s.h.i.+llings and one penny, and no more will I pay thee.” And, turning to his landlady, complained how Meg had charged him too much. ”The foul ill take me,” quoth Meg, ”if I misreckon him one penny, and therefore, vicar, before thou goest out of these doors I shall make thee pay every penny;” and then she immediately lent him such a box on the ears as made him reel again. The vicar then steps up to her, and together both of them went by the ears. The vicar's head was broke, and Meg's clothes torn off her back. So the vicar laid hold of her hair, but, he being shaved, she could not have that advantage; so, laying hold of his ears and keeping his pate to the post, asked him how much he owed her. ”As much as you please,” said he. ”So you knave,” quoth she, ”I must knock out of your bald pate my reckoning.” And with that she began to beat a plain song between the post and his pate. But when he felt such pain he roared out he would pay the whole. But she would not let him go until he laid it down, which he did, being jeered by his friends.

CHAPTER IV.

_Of her fighting and conquering Sir James of Castile, a Spanish Knight._

All this time Sir James continued his suit to Meg's mistress, but to no purpose. So, coming in one day and seeing her melancholy, asked what ailed her, for if anyone has wronged you I will requite you. ”Marry,”

quoth she, ”a base knave in a white satin doublet has abused me, and if you revenge my quarrel I shall think you love me.” ”Where is he?” quoth Sir James. ”Marry,” said she, ”he said he would be in St. George's Fields.” ”Well,” quoth he, ”do you and the doctor go along with me, and you shall see how I'll pummel the knave.”

Unto this they agreed, and sent Meg into St. George's Fields beforehand.

”Yonder,” said she, ”walks the fellow by the windmill.” ”Follow me, hostess,” said Sir James; ”I will go to him.” But Meg pa.s.sed as if she would have gone by. ”Nay, stay,” said Sir James; ”you and I part not so.

I am this gentlewoman's champion, and fairly for her sake will have you by the ears.” With that Meg drew her sword, and to it they went.

At the first blow she hit him on the head, and often endangered him. At last she struck his weapon out of his hands, and, stepping up to him, swore all the world should not save him. ”O save me, sir,” said he; ”I am a knight, and it is but a woman's matter; do not spill my blood.”

”Wert thou twenty knights,” said Meg, ”and was the king here himself, I would not spare thy life unless you grant me one thing.” ”Let it be what it will, you shall be obeyed.” ”Marry,” said she, ”that this night you wait on my plate at this woman's house and confess me to be your master.”

This being yielded to and a supper provided, Thomas Usher and others were invited to make up the feast, and unto whom Sir James told what had happened. ”Pho!” said Usher jeeringly, ”it is no such great dishonour for to be foiled by an English gentleman since Caesar the Great was himself driven back by their extraordinary courage.” At this juncture Meg came in, having got on her man's attire. ”Then,” said Sir James, ”this is that valiant gentleman whose courage I shall ever esteem.”

Hereupon, she pulling off her hat, her hair fell about her ears, and she said ”I am no other than Long Meg of Westminster, and so you are heartily welcome.”

At this they all fell a-laughing. Nevertheless, at supper time, according to agreement, Sir James was a proper page; and she, having leave of her mistress, sat in state like her majesty. Thus Sir James was disgraced for his love, and Meg was counted a proper woman.

CHAPTER V.

_Her Usage to the Bailiff of Westminster, who came into her Mistress's and arrested her Friend._

A bailiff, having for the purpose took forty s.h.i.+llings, arrested a gentleman in Meg's mistress's house, and desired the company to keep peace. She, coming in, asked what was the matter. ”O,” said he, ”I'm arrested.” ”Arrested! and in our house? Why this unkind act to arrest one in our house; but, however, take an angel and let him go.” ”No,”