Chapter 136 - Against Fate (1/2)
”I'm hopeless. Just leave me alone.”
The three were stunned at how dejected Lu Yin Ze sounded.
They looked at his back. He looked so gloomy and hopeless. The darkroom made him one with the dark.
Xiong Zhi doesn't know what to say. Or what to do. She had never comforted anyone. And she was afraid she might say some things that might trigger Lu Yin Ze. So she stayed silent. This was the reason why they made Song Xuantin practiced the right words to say to Lu Yin Ze.
Song Xuantin was the first one to move. She runs to Lu Yin Ze's bedroom and with all her might open the curtains. The warm sunlight made half of the room illuminated with light.
Lu Yin Ze saw this but he did not move. He did not say anything.
Song Xuantin opened all of the tall windows to let the morning breeze and sunlight enter the room.
Finally, Lu Yin Ze moved and went to his bathroom. He locked himself there. It was clear that he would not entertain them. He would wait until they had fun in his room and left.
He was ashamed of himself. He doesn't have the courage to meet them. He was so weak. The people in his dreams were right. He was weak and he could not do anything.
He was always the boy who was drowning in his nightmare. He would never overcome this weak side of himself.
A knock came from the door.
”Lu Yin Ze, don't be like this. Talk to us, okay? We are your friends. We can lend our ears. You can count on us.” Song Xuantin said on the other side.
Lu Yin Ze just sat on the floor. He really doesn't want to talk to anyone. If he talks to them what's he gonna say?
He was ashamed that he treats his friends like this. But really, for now, he doesn't want to face anyone.
Song Xuantin continues to say encouraging words. But after a while, Lu Yin Ze still doesn't come out. Nor he did say anything.
Xiong Zhi patted Song Xuantin on the shoulder. She could see how worried Song Xuantin was.
”I'll try to talk to him. Take a rest first. Your voice is hoarse.” Xiong Zhi looked at Gu Zhen.
”May I trouble you to take Song Xuantin and have some breath of fresh air?”
Gu Zhen realized what Xiong Zhi wanted to do.
”Alright.” Gu Zhen went to Song Xuantin. Song Xuantin dejectedly followed Gu Zhen outside the room.
Now that they alone, Xiong Zhi could talk freely. What she wanted to say must not be heard by anyone aside from Lu Yin Ze. She must be the only person who knew a bit of what Lu Yin Ze was facing. Xiong Zhi knew herself that she was not kind enough to help him to his problems. Nor she had the power to do so. But they have met in this lifetime. And surprisingly, they became friends.
”Can you hear me?”
”...” There was only silence on the other side of the door.
”I hope you can hear me.”
”....”
”Do you remember when we first met?”
”...” Xiong Zhi was not waiting for an answer.
”I followed you in the rooftop because I thought you knew the exit. At that time, I heard you say about your father killing your mother. The man you trust betray you. And you, you want to expose them by your death.”
Lu Yin Ze who was listening was shocked.
'She heard it all?'
”When I witnessed that, I thought about how cowardly and how brave you are. It was cowardly since you want the easiest way to expose them. By suffering for just a moment and leave it to fate. Then take your rest and not be bothered by it since you're dead. Thinking, you've done your best. But that's what makes you a coward.”
Lu Yin Ze bites his lips. That was the hard truth. He planned to use his death to expose them. At least his death would be meaningful and he would be helpful for once.