Part 25 (1/2)
Focus, Jack. What are beards. What are beards.
The unique food you'd give a b.u.t.terwort plant.
Inhale. Exhale. What are insects. What are insects.
An archtophilist would have a pile of these.
What are teddy bears.
He spread his hand over his chest as the pain ebbed, eased, stopped. And was not really surprised to find that he could no longer feel the beat of his heart.
Gillian watched the last of the candle flame sputter and sink into a pool of wax. A piece of paper with her mother's name on it sat smoking down to ash in a silver dish. Gillian stared at the candle, at the makes.h.i.+ft altar. Maybe the reason she doesn't come is because she hates the person I've grown up to be Maybe the reason she doesn't come is because she hates the person I've grown up to be.
It wasn't a new thought for Gillian, but today, it nearly brought her to her knees. She stood up slowly, drawn to the mirror. Picking up a pair of scissors, she stood in front of the gla.s.s and lifted a thick strand of her red hair. She chopped it off at the crown, so that a small tuft stood up, and the rest cascaded to the floor like a silk scarf.
She lifted another section, cutting it. And another. Until her skull was covered with uneven spikes, short as a boy's. Until her bare feet were covered with hanks of her hair, a pit of auburn snakes. Until her head felt so light and free that Gilly thought it might lift from her neck like a helium balloon and soar as far away as possible.
Now, she thought, he wouldn't look twice at me. he wouldn't look twice at me.
The conference rooms at the jail were narrow and ugly, with battered legal books stacked on a scarred table, windows that had been sealed shut, and a thermostat cranked up to eighty degrees. Jordan sat on one of the two chairs, strumming his fingers on the table, waiting for Jack St. Bride to be brought through the door.
St. Bride was clearly a loser-getting himself caught in a similar situation twice. But to learn that Jack had also managed to get thrown into solitary within an hour of his arrival ... well, defending him was like being given a sow's ear and told to make a silk purse.
The correctional officer who opened the door pushed Jack in. He stumbled once, glancing over his shoulder. ”Nice to know the Geneva Convention doesn't apply here,” he muttered.
”Why would it? This isn't a war, Jack. Although, rumor has it you've been ready for combat from the moment you stepped in here.” Jordan came to his feet in one smooth motion. ”Frankly, it doesn't do me any good to find you in solitary after just one day. I had to offer my b.a.l.l.s on a silver platter to the guards to get to meet with you in private in a conference room instead of through the slit in the steel door down there. You want to play the rebel here, fine-just be aware that everything you say and do here is going to wind up getting back to the prosecutor, and that you might feel the ripples all the way through your case.”
The speech had been intended to put the fear of G.o.d into Jack; to scare him into good behavior. But Jack only set his jaw. ”I'm not a prisoner.”
Jordan had been a defense attorney long enough to ignore him. Denial was something his clients excelled at. Christ, he'd once stood up for a guy who was arrested in the act of plunging a knife into his girlfriend's heart, and who maintained all the way to the State Pen that the cops had mistaken him for someone else. ”Like I said yesterday, you've been charged with aggravated felonious s.e.xual a.s.sault. Do you want to plead guilty?”
Jack's jaw dropped. ”Are you kidding?”
”You did the last time you were charged.”
”But that was ... that was ...” Jack couldn't even get the words out. ”I was wrongly accused. And my attorney attorney said it was the safest course of action.” said it was the safest course of action.”
Jordan nodded. ”He was right.”
”Don't you want to know if I committed this crime?”
”Not particularly. It isn't important to my job as your defense attorney.”
”It's crucial.” crucial.” Jack leaned over the table, right in Jordan's face. ”The last thing I need is another lawyer who doesn't even Jack leaned over the table, right in Jordan's face. ”The last thing I need is another lawyer who doesn't even listen listen to me when I tell him the truth.” to me when I tell him the truth.”
”You listen to listen to me, me, Jack. I didn't put you in jail last year, and I didn't get you arrested this time around, either. Whether you get acquitted or convicted, Jack. I didn't put you in jail last year, and I didn't get you arrested this time around, either. Whether you get acquitted or convicted, I I get to leave that courtroom free and clear. My role here is simply to be your advocate, and to translate that into the simplest terms possible, it means I'm your best G.o.dd.a.m.ned hope. While you're sitting in solitary, I get to go out and fight on your behalf. And if you cooperate with me rather than jump down my throat every other f.u.c.king minute, I'm bound to fight considerably harder.” get to leave that courtroom free and clear. My role here is simply to be your advocate, and to translate that into the simplest terms possible, it means I'm your best G.o.dd.a.m.ned hope. While you're sitting in solitary, I get to go out and fight on your behalf. And if you cooperate with me rather than jump down my throat every other f.u.c.king minute, I'm bound to fight considerably harder.”
Jack shook his head. ”You ”You listen. I didn't rape her. I was nowhere even close to her that night. That's the G.o.d's honest truth. I'm innocent. That's why I don't want to wear their clothes and sit in their cell. I don't belong here.” listen. I didn't rape her. I was nowhere even close to her that night. That's the G.o.d's honest truth. I'm innocent. That's why I don't want to wear their clothes and sit in their cell. I don't belong here.”
Jordan returned his gaze evenly. ”You were willing enough to do it before when you accepted a plea, in spite of your ... innocence.”
”And that's why,” Jack said, his voice breaking, ”there's no way I'm going to do it again. I will kill myself before I sit in jail again for a crime I didn't commit.”
Jordan looked at Jack's rumpled clothing, his wild eyes. He'd had clients before who seemed to feel that an impa.s.sioned cry for justice was the only way to muster an attorney's enthusiasm for a case; they never seemed to realize that a good lawyer could identify bulls.h.i.+t by its stink. ”All right. You weren't there that night.”
”No.”
”Where were you?”
Jack picked at his thumbnail. ”Drinking,” he admitted.
”Of course,” Jordan muttered, amazed that this case could get any worse. ”With whom?”
”Roy Peabody. I was at the Rooster's Spit until they closed up.”
”How much did you drink?”
Jack glanced away. ”More than I should have.”
”Fabulous,” Jordan sighed.
”Then I went out for a walk.”
”A midnight walk. Did anyone see you?”
Jack hesitated, for only an instant. ”No.”
”Where did you go?”
”Just ... around. Behind town.”
”But not near the woods behind the cemetery. Not anywhere near Gillian Duncan.”
”I told you, I never saw her that night, let alone touched her.”
”That's funny, Jack. Because I'm looking at that scratch on your cheek, the one that Gillian Duncan said she gave you in her victim's statement.”
”It was a branch,” Jack said through clenched teeth.
”Ah. From the forest you weren't in?” Jordan's gaze skimmed over Jack's bruised face. ”Did she beat you up, too?”
”No. It was a bunch of guys in ski masks.”
”Ski masks,” Jordan repeated, not buying a word of it. ”Why were people in ski masks beating you up?”
”I don't know.”
Jordan sighed. ”What else can you remember about that night?”
Jack hesitated. ”I remember leaving Addie's ... and then finding her again at the diner.”