Part 55 (2/2)
”'Should I be fortunate enough,'” continued Coleman '”to succeed in winning your affection, it will be the study of my future life to prevent your every wish--'”
”Eh! what do you mean? not let her have her own way? Oh! that will never pay; why, the little I know of women, I'm sure that, if you want to come over them, you must flatter 'em up with the idea that you mean to give 'em their heads on all occasions--let 'em do just what they like. Tell a woman she should not go up the chimney, it's my belief you'd see her nose peep out of the top before ten minutes were over. Oh! that'll never do!”
”Nonsense,” interrupted Freddy; ”'prevent' means to forestall in that sense; however, I'll put it 'forestall,' if you like it better.”
”I think it will be safest,” replied Lawless, shaking his head solemnly.
”'In everything your will shall be law,'” continued Coleman, writing.
”Oh! I say, that's coming it rather strong, though,” interposed Lawless, ”query about that?”
”All right,” rejoined Coleman, ”it's always customary to say so in these cases, but it means nothing; as to the real question of mastery, that is a matter to be decided post-nuptially; you'll be enlightened on the subject before long in a series of midnight discourses, commonly known under the t.i.tle of curtain-lectures.”
”Pleasant, eh?” returned Lawless; ”well, I bet two to one on the grey mare, for I never could stand being preached to, and shall consent to anything for the sake of a quiet life--so move on.”
”'If this offer of my heart and hand should be favourably received by the loveliest of her s.e.x,'” continued Coleman, ”'a line, a word, a smile, a----'”
”'Wink,'” suggested Lawless.
”'Will be sufficient to acquaint me with my happiness.'”
”Tell-her to look sharp about sending an answer,” exclaimed Lawless; ”if she keeps me waiting long after -367-- that letter's sent, I shall go off pop, like a bottle of ginger-beer; I know I shall--string won't hold me, or wire either.”
”'When once this letter is despatched, I shall enjoy no respite from the tortures of suspense till the answer arrives, which shall exalt to the highest pinnacle of happiness, or plunge into the lowest abysses of despair, one who lives but in the suns.h.i.+ne of your smile, and who now, with the liveliest affection, tempered by the most profound respect, ventures to sign himself, Your devotedly attached--'”
”'And love-lorn,'” interposed Lawless in a sharp, quick tone.
”Love-lorn!” repeated Coleman, looking up with an air of surprise; ”sentimental and ridiculous in the extreme! I shall not write any such thing.”
”I believe, Mr. Coleman, that letter is intended to express my feelings, and not yours?” questioned Lawless in a tone of stern investigation.
”Yes, of course it is,” began Coleman.
”Then write as I desire, sir,” continued Lawless authoritatively; ”I ought to know my own feelings best, I imagine; I feel love-lorn, and 'love-lorn' it shall be.”
”Oh! certainly,” replied Coleman, slightly offended, ”anything you please, 'Your devotedly attached and lovelorn admirer'; here, sign it yourself, 'George Lawless'.”
”Bravo!” said Lawless, relapsing into his accustomed good humour the moment the knotty point of the insertion of ”love-lorn” had been carried; ”if that isn't first-rate, I'm a Dutchman; why, Freddy, boy, where did you learn it? how does it all come into your head?”
”Native talent,” replied Coleman, ”combined with a strong and lively appreciation of the sublime and beautiful, chiefly derived from my maternal grandmother, whose name was Burke.”
”That wasn't the Burke who wrote a book about it, was it?” asked Lawless.
”Ah! no, not exactly,” replied Coleman; ”she would have been, I believe, had she been a man.”
”Very likely,” returned Lawless, whose attention was absorbed in folding, sealing and directing the important letter, ”Miss Fairlegh”.
”Now, if she does but regard my suit favourably.”
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