Part 12 (1/2)

”No, not like a regular lizard, either,” Anielewicz said. ”Sort of like what a dog or a cat would be if a dog or a cat had scales and eye turrets.” Predictably, that entranced Heinrich and even interested his older brother David, but left Miriam cold.

”There's no point in worrying about these creatures now,” Bertha Anielewicz said, spreading warning looks all around. ”We don't have them, and as far as we know, we can't get them. We don't even know”-she eyed Heinrich-”if we'd want one.”

”I know!” her younger son exclaimed. know!” her younger son exclaimed.

”You've never even seen one,” Bertha said.

But that was the wrong way to go about things, and Mordechai knew it. ”For now, I don't think people can have befflem, so there's nothing we can do about that,” he told Heinrich. ”Anyhow, I just saw this one by luck. I don't know if I'll ever see another one, so there's no point worrying about it, is there?”

”If I find one, can I keep it?” Heinrich asked.

”I don't think you're going to,” his mother said, ”but all right.” Heinrich grinned from ear to ear. Bertha looked confident. Mordechai wished she would have given him the chance to speak first. But she hadn't, and now they were both stuck with her answer.

Ka.s.squit was as happy as the anomalous combination of her birth and her upbringing let her be. She hadn't fully realized how much she missed Ttomalss till he returned from the Greater German Reich. Reich. Of all the males of the Race, he came closer to understanding her than any other. Having him around, having him here to talk to, was far better than staying in touch by telephone and electronic message. Of all the males of the Race, he came closer to understanding her than any other. Having him around, having him here to talk to, was far better than staying in touch by telephone and electronic message.

”In a way, though,” he said as they sat down together in the stars.h.i.+p's refectory, ”my absence may well have helped you mature. You might not have confronted Tessrek had I been here, for instance; instead, you would have left the disagreeable task to me. But you did it, and did it well.”

”Only because I had to,” answered Ka.s.squit, who would indeed have preferred not to confront a male of superior years and rank.

”Exactly my point.” Ttomalss picked up his tray. ”And now I hope you will excuse me. I have many reports to organize and write. My stay among the Deutsche proved most informative, if not always very pleasant.”

”I understand, superior sir.” Ka.s.squit did her best to hide her disappointment. She was not a hatchling any more, and could not hope to monopolize Ttomalss' time as she had when she was smaller and more nearly helpless. She could not hope to, but she could wish.

After Ttomalss left, she finished her meal in a hurry. She did not enjoy the company of large numbers of the Race; seeing so many males and females together always acutely reminded her of how different she was. Back inside her cubicle, she was simply herself, and did not need to make comparisons.

She was simply herself on the electronic network, too. What she looked like, what she sounded like, didn't matter there. Only her wit mattered-and that, she had seen, was a match for those of most males and females. No wonder she spent so much time in front of the screen, then.

She was heading toward the area where males and females discussed the new generation of the Race that had been hatched on Tosev 3 when the telephone attachment hissed for attention. With a sigh, she arrested her progress on the network and activated the phone connection. ”Ka.s.squit speaking. I greet you.”

”And I greet you, superior female.” No image appeared on the screen; the conversations remained voice-only. The male on the other end of the line-a male with a voice of odd timbre-went on, ”I needed to do a little of this and a little of that before I was able to call you, but I managed.”

”Who is this?” Ka.s.squit asked in some annoyance. Whoever he was, he had a very strange voice: not only deeper than it had any business being, but also mushy, as if he were talking with his mouth full.

”What?” he said, and somehow managed to make his interrogative cough sound sarcastic. ”You mean you do not recognize the voice of your old not-quite-friend, the senior tube inspector?”

Ice and fire chased each other through Ka.s.squit. ”Oh, by the Emperor,” she whispered, and cast down her eyes. ”You are a Tosevite.” She was talking with a wild Big Ugly. Somehow, he'd found her telephone code and arranged access to a phone connected to the Race's communication system.

”I sure am,” answered the Big Ugly male she thought of as Regeya. ”I bet you could tell the instant I opened my mouth. I cannot make some of your sounds the way...” His voice trailed off. With dull horror, Ka.s.squit knew what was coming next. Regeya was no fool. He'd heard her speak. She reached for the recessed key that would break the connection, but her hand faltered and stopped. The tongue was out of the mouth any which way. If the worst was coming, she might as well hear it. And it was. In slow wonder, Regeya went on, ”You have trouble with the same sounds I do. Are you by any chance a Tosevite yourself, Ka.s.squit?”

Ka.s.squit thought she spoke much better than the wild Big Ugly. Not only did he have trouble with some of the pops and special hisses of the Race's tongue, but he also spoke it with an odd syntax and accent: shadows, no doubt, of his own Tosevite language. But that had nothing to do with anything. ”I am a full citizen of the Empire,” she answered proudly.

Despite the pride, it was an evasion, and Regeya recognized as much. ”You did not answer my question,” he said. ”Are you a Tosevite?” He answered it himself: ”You must be. But how did it happen? What made you throw in your lot with the Race?” you a Tosevite?” He answered it himself: ”You must be. But how did it happen? What made you throw in your lot with the Race?”

He thought she was a Tosevite traitor, as some males of the Race from the conquest fleet had turned traitor after the Big Uglies captured them. She proceeded to disabuse him of the notion. ”I would not be anything but a citizen of the Empire,” she declared. ”The Race has raised me since earliest hatchlinghood.”

Regeya said something in his own language that she didn't understand, then let out several barking yips of Tosevite laughter. When at last he returned to the language of the Race, his only comment was, ”Is that a fact?”

”Yes, it is a fact,” Ka.s.squit said with more than a little irritation. ”Why in the name of the Emperor”-calling on him made her feel more secure-”would I waste my time lying to you? You are on the surface of Tosev 3, while I orbit above it. Since you must remain there, what can you possibly do to me?”

She'd nipped the Big Ugly's pride, but not quite as she'd expected. ”I have been farther from Tosev 3 than you,” he answered, ”for I have walked on the surface of the moon. So I might visit you one day.”

I hope not, was the first thought that went through Ka.s.squit's mind. The idea of coming face to face with a wild Big Ugly terrified and horrified her. Nor would she tolerate Regeya's scoring points off her. ”You may have gone from Tosev 3 to its moon,” she said, ”but the Race has come from its sun to the star Tosev.” was the first thought that went through Ka.s.squit's mind. The idea of coming face to face with a wild Big Ugly terrified and horrified her. Nor would she tolerate Regeya's scoring points off her. ”You may have gone from Tosev 3 to its moon,” she said, ”but the Race has come from its sun to the star Tosev.”

”Well, that is a truth,” the Big Ugly admitted. ”Pretty proud of the Empire, eh?” That last grunt was almost an interrogative cough in its own right.

”I am part of it. Why should I not feel pride in it?” Ka.s.squit said.

”All right-something to that, too,” Regeya said. ”How old are you, Ka.s.squit? How old were you when the Race took you from the female who bore you?”

”I was taken away when I was newly hatched,” Ka.s.squit answered. ”Had I been brought up as a Big Ugly, even in part, I would have had more trouble becoming as fully a part of the Race as I have. The male who raised me began the project not long after the fighting stopped.”

”So you would be close to twenty now?” Regeya said, half to himself. Ka.s.squit began to correct him, but then realized he naturally reckoned by Tosevite years rather than those of the Race. Laughing again, he went on, ”Well, well, quite a head start.” Ka.s.squit didn't know what that meant. Regeya was still talking: ”Did the male who raised you tell you that you were not his first attempt?”

”Oh, yes,” Ka.s.squit replied at once. ”He had to return one hatchling to the Tosevites because of political considerations, and was kidnapped while seeking to obtain another. With me, however, he succeeded.” As much as he could, as much as anyone could, As much as he could, as much as anyone could, she thought. But she would not let the Big Ugly see what lay in her mind. she thought. But she would not let the Big Ugly see what lay in her mind.

”He was honest with you, at any rate. That is something,” Regeya said. ”And you may be interested to know that I have met the Tosevite whom your male released. She is a normal young adult female in most ways, except that her face has no motion in it to speak of.”

”Neither has mine,” Ka.s.squit said. ”Here among the Race, that is of small account.”

”Yes, I suppose it would be,” Regeya said. ”It is different among us Big Uglies.” He wasn't shy about using the Race's nickname for his-and Ka.s.squit's-kind. ”You may also be interested to know that she-this other female-is one of the leaders in the rebellion against the Race in China.”

”No, that does not interest me at all,” Ka.s.squit answered. ”In the long run, rebellions will not matter. All of Tosev 3 will become part of the Empire. Males and females will be proud citizens, as I am.”

”That is possible,” the Big Ugly on the other end of the line said, which surprised her. He went on, ”But I do not think it is certain. Our kind”-by which, to Ka.s.squit's annoyance, he had to mean his and hers-”is different from the Race in important ways. For instance, we are s.e.xually receptive all the time, and the Race is not. Do you not agree that that is an important difference? How do you deal with it, there by yourself?”

”None of your business,” Ka.s.squit snapped. She felt blood rising to her face, as it did when she was embarra.s.sed. Having continuous s.e.xuality among beings who did not was extremely embarra.s.sing. She had learned that stroking her private parts brought relief from the tension that sometimes threatened to overwhelm her, but she'd been humiliated to find out Ttomalss knew what she did, even if he intellectually understood her need. She wished she were like the Race in that regard, but she wasn't.

To her relief, Regeya did not press her. He said, ”I am going to go now. I am using a telephone at the Race's consulate in Los Angeles, and it is expensive for me. If you want to get in touch with me again, my name is Sam Yeager. I decided to call just to say h.e.l.lo. I tell you the truth when I say that I had no ideal would be speaking with another Tosevite.”

”I am not a Tosevite, not in the same sense you are,” Ka.s.squit said, once more with considerable pride. ”As I told you, I am a citizen of the Empire, and glad of it.” Now she broke the connection. She did not think it would offend the Big Ugly-the other other Big Ugly-for Sam Yeager (not Regeya) had already said he was going. Big Ugly-for Sam Yeager (not Regeya) had already said he was going.

A wild Tosevite... Her hand moved in the gesture of negation. The two of them might be similar genetically, but in no other way. His accent, his alien way of looking at things, made that perfectly clear.

But, in some ways, genetics and genetic predispositions did matter. Regeya had, for instance, unerringly focused on her s.e.xuality as an important difference between herself and the Race. Ttomalss, looking at the issue from the other side of the divide, had proved far less perceptive.

Ka.s.squit wondered what the Big Ugly looked like.

It does not matter, she told herself. He probably had hair all over his head, which would make him even uglier than Tosevites had to be. His face would be snoutless, his skin scaleless. He could not help being ugly, given all that. But she remained curious about the details. she told herself. He probably had hair all over his head, which would make him even uglier than Tosevites had to be. His face would be snoutless, his skin scaleless. He could not help being ugly, given all that. But she remained curious about the details.

On the telephone, he seemed much as he did in his electronic messages: clever, and possessed of a quirky wit very different from the way males and females of the Race thought. She should have despised him for being what he was. She tried, but could not do it. He intrigued her too much.

He is a relation, she thought. she thought. In a way, he is the closest relation with whom I have ever spoken. In a way, he is the closest relation with whom I have ever spoken. She s.h.i.+vered, though the air in her chamber was not cold, or even cool: it was adjusted to the warmth the Race found comfortable. She'd never known air of a different temperature. She'd never known anyone but males and females of the Race, either-not till now, she hadn't. She s.h.i.+vered again. She s.h.i.+vered, though the air in her chamber was not cold, or even cool: it was adjusted to the warmth the Race found comfortable. She'd never known air of a different temperature. She'd never known anyone but males and females of the Race, either-not till now, she hadn't. She s.h.i.+vered again.

Over lamb chops and carrots and mashed potatoes, Jonathan Yeager listened to his father in fascination. ”That's amazing,” he said. ”They're holding her prisoner up there, and she doesn't even know she is one.”