Part 7 (1/2)

”It makes one very conceited to be a Premier,” thought Alicia, but she went into the garden.

Then began what she declared to herself was the most interesting conversation to which she had ever listened. From silence, the Premier pa.s.sed to a remark here and there, thence to a conversation, thence, as the evening went on and they strolled further and further away from the house, into a monologue on his life and aims and hopes. Young man after young man sought her in vain, or, finding the pair, feared to intrude and retired in discontent, while Medland strove to draw the picture of that far-off society whose bringing-near was his goal in public life.

She wondered if he talked to other women like that: and she found herself hoping that he did not. His gaunt form seemed to fill and his sunk eyes to spring out to meet the light, as he painted for her the time when his dreams should have clothed themselves with the reality which his persuasive imagination almost gave them now.

Then he suddenly turned on himself.

”And I might have done something,” he said; ”but I've wasted most of my life.”

”Wasted it?” she echoed in a wondering question.

”I don't know why I talk about it to-night, still less why I talk about it to you. I talked about it last to--to my wife.”

”Ah! But your daughter?”

”Daisy!” he laughed tenderly. ”Poor little Daisy! I don't bother her with it all.” Then he added, ”Really I've no business to bother you either, Miss Derosne. I break out sometimes. I'm afraid I'm not 'a silent, strong man.' Does it bore you?”

”You know--you know--” Alicia stammered.

”And now,” he said, rising in his excitement, ”even now, what have I?

The place--the form--the name of power; and these creatures hold me back and hang on my flank and--I can do nothing.” He sank back on the bench where she sat.

Alicia put her hand out and drew it back. Then she stretched it out again, and laid it on his arm.

”I am so sorry,” she said, and her voice faltered. ”Oh, if I could--but how absurd!”

Medland turned suddenly and looked her in the face.

”You will help some one,” he answered, ”some better man. And I--I beg your pardon. Come.”

Alicia asked herself afterwards if she ought to be ashamed of what she did then. She caught the Premier by the arm, and said,

”But I want to stay with you.” And then she sat trembling to hear his answer.

For a moment he did not answer. He pa.s.sed his hand over his brow; then he smiled sadly.

”Nearly twenty years ago a woman said that to me,” he said. ”But she--well, it wasn't to talk politics.”

”Oh, to call it _talking politics_!” she answered, with a little gasping laugh.

With another swift turn of his head, he bent his eyes on hers. She turned her head away, and neither spoke. Alicia played nervously with one glove which she had stripped off, while Medland gravely watched her face, beautiful in its pure outline and quivering with unwonted emotions. With a start he roused himself.

”Come,” he said imperiously, offering his arm. She took it, and, without more words, they turned towards the house.

They had not gone far, when Eleanor Scaife met them. She was walking quickly, looking round as she went, as though in search. When she saw them she started, and cried,

”Oh, I want you, Alicia.”

Medland immediately drew aside, and with a bow took his way. Alicia, calming herself with an effort, asked what was the matter.

”Why, it's that wretched brother of yours. I really do not know what Mary will say. I shall be afraid----”