Part 5 (1/2)

”Reckon you'd have wanted a lump of sugar after it, Topknot.”

The good-natured housekeeper shook with laughter as she listened to these remarks from the next room.

”What a terrible creature this _Miss Fixfix_ is!” thought she. ”Well, if they've got such an idea of me, I won't try to change it. Not for the rest of the day, at any rate. I'll keep my distance, and let 'em work.”

Mother Hubbard began to look about her with the mien of a housekeeper.

”Let us see: what are we burning here?” said she, taking off a stove-cover. ”Wood, I declare. Mrs. Fixfax is afraid I couldn't manage coal!”

”And here's a 'normous big box full of sticks,” said Lady Magnifico. ”I didn't s'pose wood grew in New York. What now, Mr. Moon? Don't I know wood is sawed out of trees? Well, what you laughing at, then?”

”Laughing, my lady? Why, who can help it, to see such a jolly room, big enough to hold a ma.s.s-meeting? That's a loud-spoken clock up there.

Wonder if Mother Hubbard notices it's just going to strike twelve?”

Prudy looked up, but did not take the hint.

”I'm so glad I remembered to bring that clock. I always used to tell my dog I prized it as much as he did his dear little tail.--Why, what's burning? That child has scorched her slip. Do take care of her, Mr.--what may I call you?--while I look over this cupboard.”

”Call me Dr. Moons.h.i.+ne, if you want to.”

”I'm glad I was so thoughtful as to order sugar,” continued the landlady. ”It's excellent to drop medicine on. What's this in a bowl?

Ice-cream?”

”Why, don't you know what that is?” said Lady Magnifico, sweeping along to the cupboard, and dipping in her dainty finger; ”that's _condemned milk_.'

”_Condensed_ milk, her ladys.h.i.+p means,” said the doctor, ”boiled down, you know, and thickened. When you make a custard for dinner, you'll have to put in a tea-kettle full of water.”

This was the second hint the young man had thrown out concerning dinner; but Prudy was not to be hurried.

”What's this in a little caddy? O, it's rice. No; it's what Dotty used to call _c.o.ker whacker_.”

”What does she call it now, may I ask?” said the doctor, with an irritating smile.

”_Patti-c.o.ker_--what you s'pose?” was the rash reply. Poor Lady Magnifico! Little tingles of shame ran down her fingers as soon as she had spoken, for she saw, by the glances between her landlady and the doctor, that she had made another mistake.

”O, I like to keep house,” cried Fly, holding up her trailing robes, and dancing over a carpet seam. ”What's this goldy thing?”

”Bellows, Toddlekins, to blow up the fire. See me fill out their leather cheeks.”

”What pretty little _blozers_! Let me blow 'em!”

There was a second dash upon the stove, and another scorch in the slip.

”There ought to be a fence built round that stove,” said the anxious father.

”Come, Mother Hubbard, have you seen all there is in the cupboard?

Can't you give this poor old dog a bone?”

”Well, here I am with the care of the family on my shoulders,” thought Mother Hubbard, winking fast behind the green spectacles, and recalling uneasily the couplet her father often repeated:--