Part 6 (2/2)

”I know. I'm really sorry.”

I'm really not.

My emotions were all over the place, and this situation was weakening me. As she relaxed into the bed again, that was all the encouragement I needed. All I wanted in the world was to feel her body next to mine, and I was going to let myself feel that tonight.

Just one night.

I knew I was lying to myself.

I hadn't noticed whether our roommates were even home. I walked over to the door and shut it so that they didn't spot her in here. Feeling protective of her, I didn't want them to get the wrong idea.

Then, I shut off the light before removing my wet jacket and taking off my s.h.i.+rt. Even though my pants were a little damp, they stayed on because, well, stripping down to my underwear would have been pus.h.i.+ng it.

Tomorrow, I told myself. Starting tomorrow, I would follow through with my plan to distance myself from her. But tonight...tonight I just wanted to sleep next to her.

”Scoot over,” I said.

She turned onto her side instantly at my command without question. My chest pressed into her back, and her body molded into mine. She was so warm and soft, practically melting into me. I couldn't resist locking my arm around her waist. We were spooning, and it felt better than anything I'd ever experienced with the opposite s.e.x up until that point. It was sensually intimate and more comforting than anything I could ever remember feeling before. I hadn't held anyone like that in years. But never had it felt like this-like home-to me.

Unable to control all the feelings that were emerging, my breathing became heavier with each second. She was being fidgety all of a sudden and made me wonder if she wasn't comfortable. ”You're moving around a lot. You okay with this, Nina? Would you rather go back to your bed?”

”No. I want to stay.”

Thank G.o.d. Because I seriously didn't know how I could've let her go right then.

”Good,” I said before tightening my grip on her side to reaffirm my own stance.

I pulled her closer to me and tried to relax, burying my nose in her hair and taking a long whiff of what I imagined heaven smelled like. I breathed in and out slowly onto her neck. I wished I could taste her. I wished I could consume every inch of her.

At one point, she pushed her soft ample a.s.s into me, and I had to reposition myself so that her b.u.t.t was against my leg and not my d.i.c.k. Still, the brief heat of her against me made my c.o.c.k swell. There was no way I could have kept this control while sandwiched in the crook of her a.s.s. Forget what I said about home earlier...that would have been home.

I was painfully hard. I hadn't been with anyone since the day I laid eyes on Nina. She had me c.o.c.k-whipped and didn't even know it.

Her sweet voice startled me. ”Jake?”

”Yeah.”

”I really am sorry for invading your privacy.”

”It's okay, Nina.”

”Thank you.”

”Nina?”

”Yeah?”

”Your underwear drawer might get rearranged this week. That's all I'm sayin.”

My lips were pressed against her back, and I could feel her laughter vibrating against my mouth.

I tightened my hold on her once again and over the next several minutes, her breathing slowed until she fell asleep in my arms.

As tired as I was, I couldn't sleep a wink. I kept thinking about how on Earth I was supposed to ever sleep alone again after knowing what this felt like. The thought of never getting to experience this again made my chest hurt, and the thought of having to alienate myself from her made me grab onto her even tighter.

At one point, Nina moved in her sleep, and her a.s.s once again managed to land right on top of my helpless d.i.c.k, now straining through my pants.

If smelling her hair was heaven, then my engorged c.o.c.k getting stuck in this predicament was h.e.l.l. It was a pleasurable form of torture, though, and I didn't want to move this time. This was my last opportunity to feel her like this, and I was going to relish every second.

I softly kissed her back as she slept, a feeling of dread growing with each minute.

When the sun came up, she was still sleeping while I had to get up for work. I had a raging case of blue b.a.l.l.s that would need to be taken care of in the shower, but it was all worth it. Everything about sleeping next to her last night was something I'd cherish for the rest of my life.

I caressed her hair one last time before I had to leave. A fleeting thought made me feel sick inside. But it was reality.

Whoever gets you someday is gonna be a lucky man.

CHAPTER 7.

Past During the first couple of weeks after our little sleepover, I stayed true to my word. Aside from our tutoring sessions, every effort was made to stay away from Nina. We never talked about the night in my bed. It was as if it never happened.

She would try to get closer to me, and my having to push her away broke my heart. Truthfully, I wanted nothing more than to let our connection grow organically and to see what could have been, but I'd resolved to do the right thing.

The low point of that time was when she'd made me a batch of banana pudding one night. Nina started a conversation about her conservative upbringing and how liberated she was starting to feel living in New York despite her fears. She began asking me questions about my childhood and was really trying to get inside my head. Instead of opening up, I just shut down and changed the subject. I filled a small bowl and ate the dessert as quickly as I could then thanked her before escaping to my room. I felt like absolute c.r.a.p for eating and running but not as badly as I felt once I realized that after that night, Nina had given up on trying.

My message had finally gotten through to her loud and clear. Aside from the tutoring, she seemed to avoid me completely after the pudding encounter.

Then, one Thursday evening, Nina was late for our study session. She knew I'd set certain rules, and number one was showing up on time. Despite my soft spot for her, when it came to the math, I ran a tight s.h.i.+p and took it very seriously, often coming across as a harda.s.s.

I planned to call her out on her tardiness, both because I wanted her to take the tutoring seriously and also because part of me was craving the attention I lost from her even though I'd pushed it away. Creating confrontation was, at least, an acceptable form of interaction for me. So, when she finally appeared at the doorway, I immediately gave her s.h.i.+t. On this particular night, for the first time, she decided to dish it out right back to me.

”Well, look who decided to grace me with her presence,” I chided.

Nina stood in the threshold. Her hair was wet as she clutched her books in front of her chest. She always did this thing where she hesitated to come in, like my room was a lion's den or some s.h.i.+t.

She wasn't smiling. ”I got stuck in a line at the market. Then, it started pouring rain. I got here as fast as I could.”

The damp smell of the rain lingered on her body as she stood in the doorway.

”You can come in, you know.”

She stepped inside and sat on the bed. ”Thank you.”

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