Part 3 (1/2)

”Time for what exactly?”

I shook my head and gazed out the window. Light snow was beginning to fall outside. ”Time to think, I guess...time away from me.”

Skylar reentered the room holding a mug. She'd gone to the kitchen to put on some tea and to call and check on their two older kids, Henry and Lara, who were staying with Mitch's mom back in New Jersey. Henry was Mitch's son, and Lara was adopted. So, Mitch Jr. was their first biological child together. His birth was a really big deal because Skylar was told she might not ever be able to have children after cancer treatments for lymphoma in her teens. Thankfully, she was in remission now.

”What did I miss?” she asked.

”Nina just texted. She's fine but says she needs more time to be alone.”

”Do you want me to call her?”

”No. I know my wife. That would annoy her even more if she thought I got you involved. She doesn't even know you're here, remember?”

”Okay. Let me know if you change your mind.”

”She just needs to blow off steam. It'll be okay. She'll come back tonight.”

That was what I kept telling myself at least. Truthfully, her walking out scared me s.h.i.+tless. It made me afraid that even after all this time, Nina had finally figured out that she could have done better and that she deserved better.

Sporting fuzzy socks, Skylar kicked her feet up on Mitch's legs. ”So, we need to get back to this story.”

”Yeah, Jake,” Mitch said. ”What happened after she moved in?”

”Oh, this is the best part.” Skylar laughed. ”This was where the quote end quote tutoring started.”

”Hey, I took it very seriously.” I smirked. ”I wanted to help her pa.s.s math.”

”You wanted to help yourself to her Pootang.”

Skylar always made me laugh.

I chuckled. ”Maybe. But at the time, I never thought I'd have a real chance at that. I was really trying like h.e.l.l to keep it platonic just so I could be around her.”

Skylar turned to Mitch. ”They came up with this bet that if she got below an A on her math exams, she would have to let Jake take her out to face one of her irrational fears.”

Mitch nodded as he rubbed Skylar's feet. ”So that brought you closer.”

”You could say that.”

CHAPTER 5.

Past Holy s.h.i.+t. It was show time.

Nina had gotten a C+ on her first exam. That was actually way better than I thought she'd do given our tedious first study session.

A few days after she moved in, we shared a beer in the kitchen. I'd been home for lunch when she walked in after her first day of cla.s.ses. (Alright, so I came home in the hopes that I'd run into her.) I'd been gone all weekend to Boston and hadn't been able to stop thinking about her. Even though she was still acting shy around me, she was really easy to talk to, and I enjoyed her company.

We got to chatting about her troubles in math, a subject she needed to pa.s.s as part of her nursing curriculum. Math was so easy for me, so I offered to tutor her. Then, the brilliant idea of a bet popped into my head. She'd have to get an A on every exam or face one of her phobias. Fear, after all, is a master motivator. If she didn't accept the bet, I told her I'd renege my offer. It was a win-win situation: either she excelled in math or started overcoming things that were preventing her from fully experiencing life.

Since she feared several things-heights, subways, planes, enclosed s.p.a.ces, crowds-it took me a while to figure out where to start. But by the time the grade came in, I was ready.

That's how I ended up in the granola aisle of Trader Joe's.

I wanted to ask the sales clerk what she recommended, but what exactly would I say? Excuse me. I was wondering if you could recommend some light fare that might compliment trapping someone in an elevator and torturing them?

I second-guessed my choices as I stood in the checkout line, but it was too late to go back since I was already running late.

Prime example: hummus. Nothing like garlic breath in a small, enclosed s.p.a.ce.

Genius, Jake.

Unsure of how she was going to react to my plan, my heart was pumping the entire way home. It was really more out of excitement, because it would be the first time we'd hung out together outside of the apartment.

Okay, apparently, I had no clue what I was really getting myself into.

Nina wouldn't even look at me as we walked side by side down Lincoln Street. She was really freaking out about this, and I needed to a.s.sure her that everything would be okay. I stopped suddenly while she kept walking ahead of me oblivious. When she noticed I was no longer beside her, she turned around.

”Why did you stop?” she asked.

I walked toward her and placed my hands firmly on her shoulders, causing her to wince. I wasn't sure if it was because she was nervous or because it was the first time I'd ever touched her outside of our initial hand shake. It was colder out than I antic.i.p.ated, and neither of us were wearing jackets. The wind blew the blonde strands of her hair around wildly. She had some beautiful hair.

I rubbed my hands firmly along her shoulders to warm her. The need to comfort her was enormous, but I'd recently studied up on cognitive behavioral and exposure therapy and knew it was necessary to be firm today so that she wouldn't back out. ”Nina, I can tell you're going through all these little scenarios in your head right now. It's not helping. The only thing that is ever happening to you is what is happening in the moment, not all of the disastrous possibilities in your mind. So, cut the s.h.i.+t, okay? I'm not going to let anything happen to you.”

When we arrived at the DeKalb Avenue subway station, it took some prodding to get her to descend the stairs. I stood down a few steps into the dark stairwell looking up at her as she stayed on the sidewalk. The fear in her eyes was palpable. My heart began to beat faster, and I wasn't sure if it was because I was nervous for her or because of how heart-stoppingly pretty she was as she looked down at me with the sunlight in her hair.

Lifting my hand toward her, I willed her to come to me. ”Nina, come on. I've got you.”

I continued to silently urge her forward with my eyes.

I've got you.

When she slowly moved toward me, the second she was close enough to touch, I took her hand and wrapped her fingers inside mine. I couldn't remember the last time holding someone's hand triggered that kind of reaction in me, a sensation I could feel from my head to my feet and everywhere in between.

My hand squeezed hers tightly as I led her down the stairs. Even though I didn't want to, I had to let her go in order to pay the fare.

The faint smell of urine lingered in the air as we sat down on a bench to wait on the platform. The sounds of a man playing the saxophone echoed through the station. When the approaching train screeched to a halt, I grabbed her hand again and led her into the crowded car.

It was the middle of the evening commute, so there were no seats. Her body started to shake as soon as the train doors slid closed. I wanted to hold her, but that probably wasn't the best idea for multiple reasons. I had to constantly remind myself of the boundaries that needed to be set for my own good. Instead, I simply rested my hands on her shoulders to keep her balanced.

”It's okay to feel nervous, Nina. You're not supposed to be comfortable. Stop trying to fight it and just let those feelings be there.”

As the train swayed, I kept my eyes fixed on her face to make sure she wasn't going to hyperventilate or anything. She wouldn't look at me. Her cheeks were flushed, and her body continued to tremble in fear. I could only take so much before I placed my hand on her chin and forced her eyes on mine. ”How are you doing?”

”Fine. I just want this to be over.”