Part 12 (1/2)

'Don't be too hard on him.'

'Don't be too hard on him? Didn't you hear what I said? I watched him cut a man's eyes out.'

'I know but were any of the Angels drugged up?'

'Probably they were too drunk for me to really tell.'

'Exactly. Moses doesn't drink or take drugs he wouldn't even take a cup of coffee that had caffeine in it. What's the one condition he lays down for joining the Dark Angels?'

'They have to have a letter from a GP that they are not on any form of prescription drugs.'

'He doesn't believe in taking methadone he says it has to be cold turkey, they must be clean. I heard he refused a guy until he'd finished his antibiotics for the clap.'

'So, what's your point?' I asked her.

'My point is, Moses and I don't always see eye to eye,' I ignored her unfortunate turn of phrase, 'but he guards and takes care of those kids better than anyone else could. The guy he blinded?'

'Bruce.'

'Well, I'll bet Bruce and the Alchemist are challenging his authority even to the point of giving the younger ones drugs.'

'So, Freud, you're saying that because his mother died of a heroin overdose, he acts like that in their best interests?' I asked.

'I prefer Jung, and, yes, Moses would protect those kids from drugs with his life.'

'So really blinding Bruce wouldn't even make his heart skip a beat? He'd see it as part of a bigger matter that he was dealing with perfectly?'

'I'll tell you something else,' went on Lavender, 'I bet next month's pay packet that he takes Bruce back into the fold.'

'That's what Joe said,' I admitted.

'What else did he say?'

'He said we had to find Alex Cattanach. I desperately want to get my hands on the witness Tanya Hayder overheard.'

'Do you really think he exists?'

'Call me naive but I think it will be easier to find that witness than Alex Cattanach.'

'Don't bet on it, not if Joe's on the case. Anyway, I'll put an advert in the Evening News personal column thanking the person for handing in the jewellery I think we'd better offer a reward.'

'But what are we going to do about Cattanach?' I dipped a piece of chocolate in the hot tea and waited for inspiration to hit me. Lavender sat at the computer composing the ad.

'I think we should involve Jack Deans,' she stated.

'What? Lavender, I thought you said he's a d.i.c.khead?'

'Well, he is compared to Joe, but he's also a great investigative journalist. We can use him.'

'What if we didn't include Jack and we just put in Cattanach's physical characteristics and searched the web for leads?'

'You're absolutely right, Brodie we could do that or we could go to the wis.h.i.+ng well in the museum and see what turns up. I'm emailing Jack now.'

The doorbell rang. She was still busy.

'Do you want me to go?' I offered.

'I wanted you to go twenty minutes ago but you didn't take the hint.'

Before she answered the door she turned Barry off and rushed to the mirror.

'I don't have my full slap on today I thought he might prefer it if I was more casual.' Lavender looked at me for rea.s.surance.

'You look lovely. George Clooney is a very lucky man.'

'George Clooney?'

'Well, who else would be worth all this trouble?'

'Smart-a.r.s.e.'

'Seriously, Lavender. This is all for Eddie, isn't it? When I first got here I thought you'd found someone else. Someone who would appreciate the nice meal and the effort. You've gone to all this trouble for a drunken wee waster who just wants a free view of the match. What do you see in him?'

'He's gentle and he's loyal ...' she began.

I cut her off mid-sentence. 'Are you looking for a man or a Labrador?'

'He's funny and he's a genius at what he does,' she went on.

'True. He's especially brilliant and funny in that window just before he pa.s.ses out.'

'He likes a drink but he's not an alcoholic.'

'He's an alcoholic.'

'He doesn't think he is and neither do I. But just supposing you're right, lots of addicts are functioning human beings. Mozart was a poly drug user, Beethoven's liver had been ravaged by drink.'

How could you argue against logic like that?

'You're a big girl now, Lavender, and if he stops you quoting b.l.o.o.d.y lists at me, I wish you all the best.'

'Brodie, you're my best friend can't we agree that I always tell you you're thin and you tell me Eddie is the man for me?'

The doorbell and knocker hadn't stopped since we started our discussion.

'Prince Charming is champing at the bit,' I told her.