Part 19 (1/2)
I look back at Geoff, still staring at the ground.
”Now you will face your judgment!” howls Starla Joy, and I jump a little, not quite ready to get back into h.e.l.l House. But Geoff follows along with us, I guess to see the rest of the show, and I see Dean nod at him as they pa.s.s. Geoff just stares ahead, looking hollow.
Little Tate Jenkins, a seven-year-old who'll be dressed as an angel, motions for us to come inside, into the crafts room, which has been staged as the judgment scene.
Vivian Moss is in this part-she's playing Saint Peter at the pearly gates. A senior, Joey Turner, had been cast originally, but he's had some trouble with his grades, and his parents punished him by making him give up h.e.l.l House. I think Pastor Frist was nervous about casting a woman as Saint Peter, but Ty's aunt has charmed everyone and she was happy to step into the role. She has a giant book of names in front of her as she stands at a pulpit set up among the tables full of glue and glitter. Dean will move those on show night, of course, and white curtains will be hung on the door on the left side of the room. The door on the right is covered in black garbage bags, and red light leaks out from underneath it-that's the entrance to h.e.l.l.
Vivian stands at the pulpit with her reading gla.s.ses on, wearing a s.h.i.+rt that says I a BOOKS. Though she's not dressed for it, she's fully in her role, glancing at each of us as we walk into the room and line up in a row along a blue piece of tape on the floor.
”This is the Lamb's Book of Life,” Vivian says ominously. ”It contains a list of all the names of people who've accepted Jesus as their Lord and Savior.” She pauses. ”Is your name in this book?”
”As I say your name, please step forward,” she says. The Demon Tour Guide, Starla Joy, has fallen silent. That's her role in the more G.o.dly scenes-it's supposed to symbolize how her strength weakens in G.o.d's presence. Then Vivian begins to read from a piece of paper, and she says each of our names out loud. ”Lacey Anne Byer,” she reads, and her eyes sit on me. She stares extra long at each person when they step forward, and then after we've all been called, she pauses for what feels like an hour, looking at each one of us individually.
This is the part in the show where people start to get really squirmy. They've seen all the sins-which is exciting and kind of cool in a gruesome way-but now they're being stared down by G.o.d's representative.
I get a chill as her eyes fix on me.
Finally, Vivian says, ”It is not your time today.” She points to the door to h.e.l.l and continues, ”But when it is your time, the choices you have made on this earth will affect your afterlife for eternity. Choose wisely.”
She walks to the door on the left, where the white curtains will hang on show night, symbolizing her exit to Heaven.
We watch her go, and then suddenly I feel my father's hand on my shoulder. I almost jump, though I should have known that was next.
”Come with me, little darlings,” he says, using the voice he's perfected over the years, Satan's sound.
We walk through black garbage bags hung over the entrance into h.e.l.l, also known as the Sunday school room. Dean isn't quite done with the staging, but the usually cheerful kids' area is definitely transformed already. There's a red light pulsating in the corner, and the walls are draped in black paper. Chains hang from the ceiling, some with lost souls attached, and the stereo system is playing a continuous track of screaming and moaning to set the mood. There's also a s.p.a.ce heater that, judging by the ma.s.sive heatwave that hit me as I walked through the door, is working overtime. I start to sweat.
My dad parts the crowd and goes to stand in the corner, and though he's not in full makeup, he does have on his hooked nose extension and the long nails he likes to wear as the devil. He uses them to creep people out by dragging them along cheeks and shoulders, and it's so disturbing that sometimes kids shake when he gets close to them.
”Some of you know where you are,” my father says, his voice deeper and darker than I remember it sounding even last year. ”Make no mistake. This is the gate to h.e.l.l.”
He throws up his arms and pauses for dramatic effect before continuing.
”This is my domain, where I have the ultimate power over you because you have stolen, you have l.u.s.ted, you have coveted, you have sinned ... and I know everything. Your actions, your deeds, your thoughts-there's nothing I didn't see. You turned away from Jesus, and I am what you turned to. Welcome to h.e.l.l!”
As I watch my dad, I start to feel uneasy. I've seen him in this role a dozen times and I've always loved the way he dramatized the devil. But tonight, I'm feeling guilty about the doubts I've had, the doubts I still have, about the church.
”G.o.d says you can join him in his kingdom, that you can sit by his side by simply following his footsteps? Never!” Dad continues, gesticulating wildly. ”I will run with fire through your lives, burning up your relations.h.i.+ps and making them sick and twisted, fattening your greed until it destroys your ambitions, killing your unborn children. I'll harness chaos and murder humanity with wars and hunger and disease. I want every one of you to rot with me down here forever!”
He puts his left arm out, and with a sweeping motion, the flas.h.i.+ng red light stops pulsing and burns bright, casting an evil spotlight on the center of the room where kids hang from chains. I look over and see Dean smiling, so I nod at him in approval of the effect.
”Meet my minions!” Dad screams. They're all screaming and weeping; they represent souls who have sinned and are in h.e.l.l for eternity. They whine, ”I can't take it!” and ”Let me out of here!” Then one-Brooke Ross-distinctly calls for Jesus.
”Silence!” shouts Devil Dad. ”His name is not welcome here. I hate everything that He loves. And He loves you. But to me, you are nothing.”
”Demon!” he shouts at Starla Joy. ”Remove this sc.u.m from my presence.”
She grabs Brooke by the arms and pulls her away, kicking and screaming, like she knows she's being led to even worse torture.
Then Dad-Satan-laughs and turns his eyes on us. ”This is a glimpse of what you are headed for if you keep doing what I know you've been doing and thinking about doing.”
Usually the devil goes down the line, saying something to every guest that may or may not resonate. I always remember, it's not Dad-it's the devil. When my father is in this role, he disavows himself of any responsibility, he goes for it. And he uses what he sees to divine sins that really might be there, under the surface.
He walks up to Dean and puts one long nail under Dean's chin. ”What sins lie within your mind, Dean Perkins?” he asks. ”In the darkness of a sixteen-year-old boy's room there are many temptations.” Then Dad howls and breaks into demonic laughter. He always uses people's names when he knows them-it just makes the scene more effective.
I'd worry about Dean, but I know he knows the drill-this is h.e.l.l, and there are no holds barred for this performance.
Dad makes his way to Maryanne and gives her some generic las.h.i.+ng about respecting her parents. I thought that was the one he was going to use on me, but I guess not.
When he does get to me, I'm nervous. He's never turned this on me before, never looked at me and tried to see sin. I close my eyes for a second as he approaches.
”Look at me, Lacey Anne Byer!” he screeches.
I open my eyes and see the devil staring me in the face.
”When you deceive, you sin,” he rasps. ”And even if you don't get caught, you know in your heart that you have sinned.”
I feel a trickle of sweat drip down the side of my forehead. Does Dad know I've snuck out? Or is he just fis.h.i.+ng for a sin and coming up with this one? I stay very still, trying not to react.
”And why deceive, if not to cover up more deep, dark, and ugly sins? Sins of betrayal, of doubting your Father, of l.u.s.t?” he says that last word with feeling, and my face starts to redden. Luckily it's dark in here. When he said ”Father,” did he mean G.o.d? Or himself?
How does he know?
Then he moves on, quickly, to Ron Jessup, whom he hits with greed. I relax my shoulders in relief that my confrontation with him is over, and I remind myself that it's all an act, and it's all in the name of G.o.d.
Soon Dad backs away, facing all of us at once, and talking about breathing deceit into our souls so that he can one day own them.
Then, a white floodlight pours into the dark room. ”Satan, these are not your children,” says a calm voice. It's Pastor Frist, who always plays Jesus. I think it's an excuse to let his hair become a mullet and grow a beard, but he does resemble Christ. He's wearing a white choir robe and there are two little kids at his side dressed as angels with golden pipe-cleaner halos. I hope he talked to Mr. Parsons. I hope he gave him lots of coffee.
My father, the devil, starts shrieking-it's the most hideous sound I can imagine hearing-and he shrinks to the back of the room as Jesus leads us out of h.e.l.l. I'm glad to get away from that s.p.a.ce heater-it's really cranked up. We walk into the hallway, where there are more angels waiting to greet us with warm handshakes as we head to the library, which is staged as Heaven.
Dean built one of those small garden bridges from Home Depot, and it's positioned over a kiddie pool that I'm pretty sure came from Maryanne Duane's house. There are cotton clouds hanging all around the room, and Jesus marches in front of us, then sits upon His throne and welcomes us to gather around.
All of the angels smile at us-it's their job to make people feel welcome.
”My children,” Jesus says, ”this is but a glimpse of what awaits you in heaven if you accept me as your Lord and Savior. I died for your sins, and though sin still exists in the world, all you must do is invite me into your heart and you will be saved.”
There's audio of birds tweeting, and a projection of a rainbow appears over Christ's throne. Dean is going all out on this room! We stay a minute more, as angels come around and hug us, and then a very humbled and quiet Starla Joy leads us out and into the main lobby of the church.
On h.e.l.l House nights, this lobby will be the room where our junior pastor, who hardly ever gets to talk in church, asks people to pledge their lives to Jesus. He'll do a prayer with everyone and then ask people to fill out cards with their contact information if they've committed or recommitted to Christ tonight. Over the course of three nights of h.e.l.l House, we collect hundreds of cards, and each one represents a saved soul.
Tonight, though, the lobby is just the lobby, and Starla Joy takes off her demon mask. ”Pretty crazy, right?” she says, finally talking in her mellow normal voice.
”Yeah,” I reply.
Chapter Twenty-five.