Part 19 (1/2)

A good something or a bad something? T.J. asked.

A good something, Cooper replied. I love you.

T.J. pulled away slightly and looked at her. Did you just say what I think you said? he asked.

Cooper nodded. Dont sound so shocked.

T.J. laughed. I just never expected you to be the one to say it first, he said.

Thats not what youre supposed to say back, said Cooper.

T.J. hugged her tightly. I love you, too, he said. And Im glad you said it first.

Okay, Cooper said. Lets not make a big thing out of this.

They stood there holding each other for a few minutes, neither of them saying anything. But although her mouth was silent, Coopers mind was racing with emotions. She wanted to cry. She wanted to laugh.

She wanted to sing and shout and run until she fell into an exhausted heap of happiness. She was so excited that she felt like she might burst if T.J. let go of her, the thrill of being in love and being loved back was so strong in her.

You did it, she told herself. You listened to Mr. Goldstein. You looked for the love and grabbed it.

And as she felt T.J.s heart beating alongside her own, she knew that, as Mr. Goldstein had promised her, love would help her get through anything.

CHAPTER 17.

I know she knows something, Annie kept telling herself. First she said that thing at my house the other night, and then in school today she was all weird, too. Its like shes just waiting for me to break.

It was Monday afternoon. Annie was at Shady Hills. She was working in the kitchen, helping chop vegetables for dinner. Since she was so good at cooking, she had listed kitchen help as one of the things she would like to do. Until that afternoon theyd never a.s.signed her to it, but now she was happy to just stand in one spot cutting up carrots and celery. It was mindless work, and it gave her time to think.

What she was thinking about was Kate. Ever since Kate had made the comment about Annies being good at games, Annie had been paranoid. Kate hadnt said anything else about it. But shed asked the question about who Annie would most like to go out with. Why would she ask that if she didnt suspect something was going on? Annie asked herself. And Kate had been friendly but distant at school, making Annie even more nervous.

Annie had even called Tyler to ask him if hed said anything to Kate. Hed sworn that he hadnt. And the only other people who knew anything about the situation were Cooper and Becka, and Annie knew that neither of them had said anything to Kate.

That was another thing”she was missing Becka. When Becka and her father had left the night before, Annie had felt sad. Shed really enjoyed having Becka there for the holiday, and shed enjoyed having Mr. Dunning there as well, although she hadnt seen very much of him. He and Aunt Sarah had spent most of their time together. But even though it was a brief visit, the two of them already felt like family to Annie. Shed grilled her aunt about what was going on with her and Mr. Dunning, but Aunt Sarah had simply smiled and said, Isnt he a nice man?

Everyone is playing games with me, thought Annie. She really did feel like her world was spinning around and around and she was waiting for it to stop so she could get her bearings. The thing with Tyler had been bad enough when she was the only one worrying about it. But now it was worse because shed told several people and she couldnt help but wonder whether or not they had already talked or might tell someone they shouldnt. She hated feeling like that, and she wished she could just shake her head and clear it.

She chopped at the pile of carrots on her cutting board, neatly dicing them into little cubes. She pushed the pile along with the ends of her fingers cupped against the wooden board, just as shed taught herself to do from watching cooking shows on TV. As the carrots were pushed toward the sharp steel blade of the knife, on the other side they came out as perfectly square bits ready to be put into the dish the cook was making.

If only I was as good at managing my life as I am at cooking, things would be much easier, she thought as she started on another bunch of carrots. What am I going to do? Becka had said not to tell Kate anything, and Annie really wanted to believe that that was the best approach to the situation. But Kate was obviously aware that something was up, even if she didnt know the details. How long would it be before she figured it out? Maybe it would be better to just tell her now, thought Annie. But just thinking about that made her stomach hurt. How could she ever look Kate in the face and tell her that shed kissed Tyler?

All of a sudden she felt a sharp pain in her hand. She looked down and saw something red splashed against the orange of the carrots. The effect was startling, and she was so fascinated by the brightness of the red that it was another few moments before she felt a searing pain and realized that shed cut herself.

She held up her hand and saw a deep cut going through her index finger. Blood ran from it and dripped onto the half-finished pile of carrots on the cutting board.

Annie grabbed a dishrag from the counter nearby and held it to her hand. She knew that she had to stop the bleeding, and she remembered reading somewhere that putting pressure on it was the best way to do that. So she held the towel tightly around her finger, trying to ignore the throbbing pain that radiated through her hand and into her arm.

It will be okay, she told herself. Its just a cut. Youve had cuts before.

She looked at the towel and saw that it was dark with blood that was soaking through from the cut. She knew that a regular cut wouldnt bleed that much. Something was wrong. Gently she unwound the towel to look at the damage to her finger and found that the wound was still bleeding freely. The skin gaped open slightly, and she could see that the cut went almost to the bone.

Marge! Annie called to the kitchen director. Ive got to go see the nurse.

Marge heard her and came running over. When she saw the blood-soaked towel she put her hand to her mouth. Go, honey, she said. Get down there right now. Do you want someone to help you?

Annie shook her head. Im okay, she said. I think I just need a Band-Aid.

She left the kitchen and walked down the hall. Luckily, the nurses office wasnt too far, and she was there in under a minute. But when the nurse on duty looked up from her desk and saw Annie standing there with blood dripping from her bandaged hand, she stood up immediately.

Sit down, she ordered, leading Annie to an examination table at the back of the room.

Annie climbed onto the table and sat, her legs hanging over the end. She watched as the nurse peeled the grisly towel away and looked at the finger beneath it.

Howd you manage this? she asked.

I was cutting vegetables in the kitchen, answered Annie. The knife must have slipped.

This is going to require st.i.tches, the nurse said.

St.i.tches? said Annie. But its just a cut.

A cut that goes almost to the bone, replied the nurse. Now, you just sit there and dont move. Im going to have to get one of the residents to do this.

The nurse left, leaving Annie to contemplate her cut finger. How had it happened? She was usually so careful when it came to working in the kitchen. The most shed ever had was a small cut from trying to peel a lemon with a knife. But this was bad. Even she could see that now. In fact, she was feeling kind of queasy looking at it. It was as if the knife had had a mind of its own, like it had wanted to cut her.

The nurse came back in, accompanied by a young man. There she is, the nurse said.

The man came over and inspected Annies finger. Hi, he said. Im Dr. Albion.

Hi, said Annie stupidly. There were always residents at the home. They came there to learn about geriatric medicine, then left when their stays were over, to be replaced by new residents. Annie seldom knew their names, mainly because she liked to stay as far away from the infirmary as possible.

This is a bad cut, said Dr. Albion. But Ill st.i.tch it up and youll be fine. Just let me get the things Ill need.

He went to the cupboard at the back of the room and returned a minute later with a small plastic container holding various things. As he laid them out on the white paper cloth that covered the tray he was working on, Annie felt herself getting nervous. There were small curved needles, lengths of black thread, and gauze pads. Worst of all, there was a hypodermic needle.

Whats that for? asked Annie when the doctor picked up the needle.

Its to numb the area, he explained. Its best if you dont watch. Im going to have to give you a couple of pokes.

Annie shut her eyes, waiting for the first needle stick. When it came, she let out a little yelp. It hurt more than shed expected, and the sharp sting of the needle was followed by an even more unpleasant burning sensation. She bit her lip and hoped it would go away soon.