Part 9 (1/2)

I tried , said Jane. But you were really out of it.

Cooper sat up and rubbed her eyes. That was really weird, she said.

What was? asked Jane.

The meditation, Cooper told her. I saw this owl.

Your totem animal is an owl? Jane asked.

Apparently, said Cooper. But it wasnt all that helpful, really.

It could be worse, Jane said. It could have been a llama. Or a Teletubby.

Cooper didnt speak for a moment. She was thinking about what shed seen during her meditation journey. Once again her mind filled with doubts. Was it all just a big daydream, or had she really contacted a guardian from one of the three inner realms? I guess Ill never really know, she told herself.

A knock on Janes door startled Cooper back to the moment. Jane opened the door and her grandfather looked in. Mr. Goldstein was old and frail. He walked with a cane, and he was leaning on it now as he looked into the room.

Are you girls all right? he asked in a voice that was more like the sound of wind in the branches of a tree than anything else.

Were fine, Grandpa, Jane said. Do you need me for anything?

Mr. Goldstein shook his head slowly. Then he looked at Cooper, his large round eyes blinking at her behind his gla.s.ses. I was sleeping, he said. I had a dream. About her.

Jane looked at Cooper. You had a dream about Cooper? she asked.

The old man nodded. I was back there, he said. During the war. She came to me. She asked for my help.

Cooper looked at Jane with a puzzled expression on her face. Jane looked away. Its okay, Grandpa, she said. Were both fine. Ill come out to make dinner in a minute, okay?

Mr. Goldstein turned and shuffled down the hallway. When he was gone Cooper asked, What did he mean he was back there?

In the camp, Jane said quietly.

The concentration camp? Cooper asked. Shed seen the faded tattoo on Mr. Goldsteins arm, and she knew that he had lived through one of the infamous n.a.z.i death camps. But Jane never spoke about it, and Cooper didnt know how to ask her without seeming nosy.

Yes, Jane said. Sometimes he dreams about it.

And I was in his dream, Cooper said. Asking him for help.

He probably fell asleep right afer seeing you come in, said Jane. Im sure it doesnt mean anything.

Cooper thought for a moment. She recalled looking into the owls eyes. Then she thought about looking into Mr. Goldsteins big dark eyes. I come in many forms . Thats what her totem animal had told her.

Help comes in many forms.

Cooper looked at Jane. I think maybe it does mean something, she said.

CHAPTER 9.

Somethings going on with you.

Annie looked at Eulalie Parsons. The old woman was sitting in the chair beside the window in her room at Shady Hills. Her hands were in her lap and she was watching intently as Annie changed the sheets on the bed.

Why do you say that? Annie asked, ducking down to tuck in the corners of the sheet.

Eulalie laughed. Its all over you, she said simply. Hanging around like some kind of dog following at your heels.

Annie sighed. She really liked Eulalie, but sometimes it annoyed her that the old woman could tell so much about people just by looking at them. Eulalie said she could see emotions as colors, and she often knew Annies mood before Annie herself realized why she was feeling a certain way.

Ive just got a lot going on, she said, pulling the bedspread over the sheets. You know, school and stuff.

Mmm-hmm, said Eulalie. And I bet its the stuff thats got you all worked up.

Annie put her hands on her hips. Im fine , she said. Really.

Eulalie pursed her lips but didnt say anything. She just looked at Annie with a steady gaze. Annie looked right back at her, daring her to say something else. After a minute Annie said, Ive got to go do the other rooms. Ill be back later.

She turned and started to walk out, the dirty sheets in her arms. As she was leaving Eulalie said quietly, Ben doesnt think youre fine either.

Annie stopped. Ben Rowe was the former resident of Eulalies room. Annie had met him on her very first day as a volunteer at the nursing home. Hed become a good friend to her, and his sudden death over the summer had been hard on her. When Eulalie moved in and Annie discovered that the old woman could talk to Bens spirit, it had made her feel as if she were still connected to him. Now, though, it just irritated her.

Tell Ben he worries too much, she said shortly, and walked out.

She threw the sheets from Eulalies bed into the big wheeled hamper she used on her rounds and began to push it down the hall. Great, she thought, now Ben and Eulalie know that Im fooling around with my best friends boyfriend. The thought upset her. Was it that obvious? What did Eulalie see when she looked at Annie? Annie pictured herself with a big neon sign over her head reading TRAITOR . She pictured it flas.h.i.+ng on and off, the bright red letters branding her as the horrible person she felt she was.

It had been four days since she and Tyler had made out. Four very long days. She alternated between feeling like she was in a dream and in a nightmare. When she talked to Tyler on the phone”which shed done every night since their kiss, and when she thought about how it felt to have him hold her, which she did about every three seconds, she was filled with happiness. But when she was with Kate and heard her talking about how much she missed Tyler, or when she thought about how Kate would feel if she knew what had happened between her and Tyler, she wanted to die.

Youre overreacting, she scolded herself. Eulalie and Ben dont know whats going on. They just know that youre upset about something. She really hoped that was the case. She didnt know what she would do if someone actually asked her if she was getting involved with Tyler. Coopers grilling at Crones Circle the week before had been hard enough, and that was before Tyler had even told her that he felt the same way about her that she felt about him. Annie knew that if Cooper asked her now what was going on she would have a really hard time not telling her.

But what is going on? she asked herself. What are you and Tyler doing? She stopped pus.h.i.+ng the cart and leaned against it. That was the question she couldnt answer. What were the two of them doing? She didnt know, and they hadnt really talked about it. Theyd both danced around the issue, almost as if they were pretending that Kate wasnt there”and that, as far as Kate knew, Tyler was still her boyfriend. But they were going to have to talk about these things, and soon. Annie knew that if she had to keep on pretending that nothing was going on she was going to go crazy.

She left the cart where it was and walked down the hall to the pay phone next to the cafeteria. She knew she could use the phone in the nurses office, but she didnt want anyone to hear what she was saying.

She fished in her pocket for change and plunked it into the coin slot. Then she dialed.

h.e.l.lo?

Hi, Annie said. Its me.

Oh, hi, Tyler said happily. I was just thinking about you.

Annie immediately felt a warm glow inside, but it was quickly extinguished as she thought about why she was calling. We need to talk, she said.