Chapter 73 (1/2)

Chapter 73

“Your highness.”

Luis handed me the book with a black leather binding. I asked her to bring it for me from the library.

“Thank you. Was it heavy?”

“A little. By the way, why did you want a book about the Coronos War?”

I couldn’t tell her the truth. My meeting with Clodys at the library needed to remain a secret. This book was my way of communicating with Clodys.

I replied, “I started to read it by accident, and I became interested. I didn’t get to finish it last time.”

As I flipped through, I found a message card stuck in the middle of the book.

Luis nodded when she saw it.

“That must be where you left off last time.”

She must have thought it was my bookmark. I smiled and nodded.

“Yes. The book is very interesting and informative.”

I picked up the message card. It had a simple design and Luis didn’t pay attention to it. The material and design of the card were very different than the ones I used, but she didn’t seem to notice.

Luis left my side and I turned the card around. On it was a picture of a red lily, which was Princess Liliana’s symbol. There was also a message.

It was one word.

Yes.

Below it was two initials.

C & L

I smiled secretly.

We had a deal.

***

It was an unexpected relationship built on needs rather than trust. However, I felt that this was a better relationship. We needed each other in order to get what we wanted, which meant we couldn’t betray each other.

Besides, you could never trust anyone anyway.

What I needed to do was to report to Lucretius about this.

“…”

However, I had no idea if this new development would work out. Should I let him know after I have accomplished more?

I couldn’t figure out what to do.

I also wondered if he already knew about this. If he did, it meant he was spying on me still. I felt angry at the possibility, but it also would have meant I wouldn’t have to report to him about it.

If he didn’t know what was going on, it meant he wasn’t spying on me. I would have felt relieved, but I didn’t want to have to report to him about it.

There were a few reasons why I hesitated in telling him about this.

First, Liliana and Clodys were a part of his family whether he liked it or not. This would be an uncomfortable alliance. On top of that, this meant he now had to protect two more people and promise their safety.

Another thing I worried was how he would feel about what happened in the library.

The fact was, I was with another man alone in the library.

It wasn’t intentional. It was to make a political deal. In addition, Clodys was in love with someone else. Lucretius and I weren’t exactly a couple anyway.

All in all, I knew I didn’t do anything wrong, but I just didn’t want to tell him about it.

Why did this bother me so much?

“…”

I didn’t know why. I just felt uncomfortable and nervous telling him about it.

I felt as if I cheated on him.

“[… Have I finally gone mad?]”

***

“…”

“…”

Only the sounds of cutleries were heard in the room.

Today was the day all royal family members gathered for a meal. The former emperor’s concubines weren’t invited. Only the direct family members of the current emperor were allowed. This included the dowager empress, the emperor, the wives of the emperor, and their children

As soon as a royal child turned five, he or she received a personal wing with servants and maids. It was rare for the entire royal family to eat a meal together.

The Great Meal, as it was called, happened in the Mano Hall. It wasn’t the biggest hall in the castle, but still too big for my taste.

“…”

“…”

The dowager empress didn’t attend with an excuse on the matter of her pregnancy. As the emperor didn’t have any children or any other wives, this meant this Great Meal would consist of just Lucretius and I.

This was awkward.

I saw him every day, but in this hall with such a huge long table, it felt strange.

Was it because I felt guilty?

I shook my head. Why should I feel guilty? I didn’t do anything wrong.

My mouth felt dry. I drank my wine, but it couldn’t quench my thirst. I was very nervous.

How should I start this conversation? Why wasn’t he saying anything? He usually sputtered nonsense all the time.

My heart was pounding. My eyes met with him briefly, which made my condition worse.

Why? I couldn’t understand.

When I finally got the courage to say something, he said to me.

“You look tired. Are you feeling unwell?”

“…!”

His quiet voice rang throughout the hall. It surprised me. I flinched and dropped my fork.