Part 5 (2/2)

That couldn't be more true. And it couldn't have made me more sad for her. Yes, I was being judgmental, but I'd been on the receiving end of judgment myself for too long.

Grace said, ”So, what's up with Krystal?”

Jesus. What a topic. One that I didn't want to talk about. One that would only confirm that she and my parents were right about this probably being a bad scene for me. One that would give them the wrong impression about how wonderful things were really going when you considered everything with Max.

I said, ”I hardly ever see her. She's always working at that restaurant or going to casting calls.” There. I lied. But I had to. And it worked. She moved on to something else.

”What do you do when you're not working?” she asked.

I could have answered truthfully with the one-liner that popped into my head: When I'm not working, I do Max. When I'm not working, I do Max. But that was a little joke I had to keep to myself. But that was a little joke I had to keep to myself.

I gave her a generic response-hanging out with friends, still trying to see all of the city and the surrounds, going to the gym....

”Have you met any boys yet?”

Boys.

I must have hesitated just slightly too long because I clearly gave away the answer.

We were lying on the bed. I was on my back, she was on her stomach, and when she sensed I had something juicy to tell, she flipped over on her side to face me.

”Ohhh, you have. Do tell.”

So I told. Even about the trip to Napa. But not about New York.

”And...remember when I told you that someone saved me from Chris that night at my apartment door?”

”Yeah. A neighbor, but...it was this guy?”

I nodded.

”Wow.”

”I know. And I'm sorry I lied to you about him.”

”Don't worry about it. So, what movies has he done?”

I told her, and she recognized a couple of them. She liked one of them so much, she had a DVD of it at home.

She was silent for a moment. Then another, ”Wow,” but this time softer, like she was trying to imagine what it would be like to live her younger sister's life. ”You look happy, but...you kind of also don't.”

s.h.i.+t. She could read me well.

”It's just that I'm pretty sure he's serious about me, but I'm afraid that I feel more than he does. You know?”

”Have you brought it up with him?”

”Oh, G.o.d no.”

”Why not?”

I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. When I thought about this, my chest got tight and my stomach churned.

”I don't want to push things too fast,” I said.

She nodded. ”So, have you slept with him?”

”Yes.” I closed my eyes.

”Then it's serious.”

Sometimes Grace could be really rational and insightful. Sometimes she could be really nave. And sometimes she could be both of those things at almost the same time.

”I don't know,” I said.

”What does he look like?”

I got my phone out of my bag to do a Google Image search. I'd had it on mute all night, and when I swiped the screen I saw that I had missed a text from Max.

It read: I'm coming to get you. I'm coming to get you.

”Hang on,” I said to Olivia. ”Have to text somebody back.”

”Him?”

”Yeah.”

I texted: What!? What!?

Max: That was a joke and it was two hours ago. That was a joke and it was two hours ago.

Me: You couldn't find me anyway. You couldn't find me anyway.

Max: You underestimate me. You underestimate me.

Me: I know. It's a bad habit. I know. It's a bad habit.

Max: Please keep doing it. Makes it easier to impress you. Please keep doing it. Makes it easier to impress you.

Me: So you weren't really coming to get me? So you weren't really coming to get me?

Max: No. My dreams will have to suffice tonight. No. My dreams will have to suffice tonight.

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