Part 11 (1/2)
Don't try to rush it. You can't help men much until you know them very well; and when you know them you find how utterly different they are from what you had expected them to be. At least I do. No two men are alike. Each man that you come really to know is utterly different from any man you have ever met or will meet.
_To F. J. C._
Christ's College, Cambridge: November 5, 1900.
It is good of you to think of me and above all to pray for me. I need your prayers--and most of all when I am run down and unable to pray myself. I can see the mountain top at times: then the mist comes down, and I cannot see the way; I try to keep where I am, though I may not be able to advance; and when the mist clears I go on again. Possibly, sometimes, we may be going forward even in the mist, although we seem to be making no progress, or going backward.
G.o.d judges by a light Which baffles mortal sight.
I often wish I had more physical strength and was able to do what other men can do; but I can't. And I have no doubt that all is well--that I am made to do one particular piece of work, and that I have strength enough for that--and thank G.o.d for that.
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_To a brother in South Africa._
December 1900.
It is a marvellous thought that G.o.d can reveal Himself to man--even primitive man. In those stories Jehovah is very near to man. He walks in the garden at nightfall. He shuts Noah into the Ark. He comes down to see the city and the tower 'which the children of men builded.' He talks with Moses face to face as a man speaketh to his friend--and a ladder connects heaven and earth, and the angels, instead of using wings, walk up and down the ladder--and, behold, Jehovah stood above it. At any moment you might meet Jehovah Himself. Three men come to see Abraham--and Jehovah has appeared to him. A man wrestles with Jacob, and he has seen G.o.d face to face. They were right when they thought of G.o.d as very near to man, of man as capable of reflecting G.o.d's likeness. Ye too shall see heaven opened and the angels of G.o.d ascending and descending upon--the Son of man. It is good for us as children to read these stories to realise that heaven is very near to earth. It is good for us as men to read them again to realise that heaven is even nearer earth than we thought as children. As I said before, how marvellous it is that G.o.d can reveal Himself to man and through man, that He has revealed Himself entirely, 'the perfect man,'
as Maurice says, reflecting the perfect G.o.d--G.o.d and man so near one to the other that men can look upon the Son of man and see G.o.d--see Him in His perfection! Our years ought to be bound each to {136} each by natural piety. The child should surely be the father of the man.
With age Thou growest more divine, More glorious than before; I fear Thee with a deeper fear Because--I love Thee more.
I have been reading Moody's Life. It has much the same effect as Finney's used to have in days gone by--it creates a longing to work and live for G.o.d, to bring men nearer to Him, to come nearer to Him myself.
Whom have I in heaven but Thee? and there is none upon earth that I desire in comparison of Thee.
What a wonderful thing that we, as a family, are so united--that our Ideal is so much the same--isn't it?
_To F. S. H._
St. Moritz: January 6, 1901.
I have succeeded in unfreezing my ink, so I can write and--although it is late to do so--wish you a happy new century. It is only once in a lifetime that one can do that sort of thing! I am out here for my health. I wasn't up to much last term. However, I am as fit as a lord now, and return to Cambridge this week. I have been reading out here two very different kinds of books. One is Wellhausen's 'History of Israel,' the other Moody's Life by his son. Wellhausen's book gives you in outline the position of modern advanced criticism of the Old Testament. I have never before studied the history from the critical point of view really seriously. The study has proved extraordinarily interesting, and I {137} must say that in the main I agree thoroughly with Wellhausen's position. You will see it more or less clearly put in that 'History of the Hebrew People' in two small volumes by Kent which I recommended to you before. The history of the gradual progress of the divine revelation to the human race is a marvellous study: the way in which that people were educated to become the teachers of the world is utterly different from anything which we should have devised.
I am struck more and more by the marvellous fact that G.o.d can and does reveal Himself--in His essential moral nature--to man; that we are so made that we can apprehend the revelation; nay, that we in turn can in measure reveal Him to men!
Moody's Life stirs me up to realise more the worth of the individual, the surpa.s.sing value of man's moral and spiritual nature. I long to help men to see what I see, to love Him whom I love, and the failure of my efforts is largely, I feel, due to defects in myself. Still I do not despair of doing something.
_To his brother Edward in South Africa._
Brislington, Bristol; April 10, 1901.
I was much interested in . . . (your letter) and in seeing a little into your life. There is a strange family reserve among us which I sometimes deplore. Perhaps it must always be so, that we can tell most readily to strangers our deepest thoughts and feelings. Yet I feel that we ought, as far as we can in this short life, to understand one another. We have been led by different paths to understand different aspects {138} of Truth. Yet, when we have climbed to the top of the hill, I dare say we shall find that our paths were nearer to one another than we ever realised. At any rate, we shall meet on the top.
I often think that your whole method of gaining truth must be unlike mine. I use my reason, but I am more than half affection, and it is that which helps me most. My strange love for some men makes me seek to live their lives, to see the world as they see it; above all, it forces me to pray. Prayer never seems to me irrational; yet I do not pray so much because my reason bids me as because my affection forces me. I sometimes feel that I should go mad if I didn't or couldn't.
And then, again, I am incapable of telling them all I feel, and I have to find some one to tell it to, and I feel forced back on One who knows me through and through, and I find comfort in pouring out my soul to Him--in telling Him all, much that I dare say to no one else--in letting Him sift the good and evil--in asking Him to develop and satisfy the good, and to exterminate the evil. I cannot help trusting Him.
I know not where His islands lift Their fronded palms in air; I only know I cannot drift Beyond His love and care.