Part 16 (1/2)
”Treacherous,” I filled in quietly, remaining perfectly still with my cheek touching the pillow, not daring to lift my face and allow him to see my vulnerability.
It was too much.
I was too raw around him.
”It's a warning,” I finally whispered, forcing down the huge swell of emotions bubbling up inside of me. ”A reminder.”
”Of me,” he said flatly. ”Of what I represented to you.”
Noah's hand left my skin, leaving me feeling empty, and I twisted around, watching him in all his naked glory, as he slid out of bed and began to dress.
”Treacherous,” he repeated, deadpan, as he slipped on his boxers. ”That's how you saw me.” Running a hand through his messy hair, he hissed with frustration before dropping his arms to his sides, hands balled into fists.
”Yes,” I replied honestly. ”That's how I saw you.”
”And now?” he asked, eyes torn and full of hurt, as he zipped up his jeans and shrugged his vest on over his head. ”Is that how you still see me?”
When I didn't reply, Noah nodded stiffly. ”I should go.”
I wasn't sure what I was surprised at most; the hurt in Noah's brown eyes as he stormed out of my bedroom, or my heart that was screaming at me to stop him from leaving.
Rolling out of bed, I tossed my overly long, and overly knotted hair, back off my shoulder, and grabbed the sheet off my bed to cover my dignity before racing after him. I made it into the kitchen just as he was stepping through the doorway. ”Who's the one running now?” I called out in a much shakier voice than I wanted.
Turning in the doorway, Noah stared hard at me. His eyes raked over me, turning darker than they already were, and my cheeks turned bright pink. ”Go back to bed, Thorn,” he finally said with a heavy, and almost pained, sigh. ”It's better this way.”
Tightening my hold on the bed sheet wrapped around my chest, I asked, ”better for who?” The hurt in my voice was obvious, but I was beyond pretending. Him being here was throwing me. I couldn't think rationally. I was drowning in emotion, losing myself to my feelings for him and I hated it.
”Better for the both of us,” he shot back in an irritated tone, gesturing wildly with his hand. ”Look, I can't f.u.c.king deal with this right now. I've had too much to drink to think clearly.”
”So you're just going to walk away?” I asked, appalled. Shaking my head, feeling too exposed and too weak to argue, I walked back towards my bedroom, forcing myself to look impa.s.sive, while my heart was hammering against my ribcage. ”Go ahead and leave then. At least I'll know where I stand with you this time,” I tossed out, stopping in the hallway outside my bedroom door, unable to stop myself from throwing a jibe.
Dropping his hands to his sides, he balled them into fists and stalked after me. ”See, this is exactly why I need to leave!” Rubbing his face with the palm of his hand, Noah took two steps towards me before stopping abruptly and letting out a groan. ”I can't think straight when I'm around you,” he groaned. ”I need to clear my head and think about what the h.e.l.l just happened tonight”
”Then you go right ahead and do that,” I shot back, not waiting around to watch him leave I couldn't bear to. Instead, I slipped inside my bedroom and slammed the door shut before locking it. Rus.h.i.+ng over to my stereo, I blasted it to the max, desperate to drown out his voice, and the sound of my perfectly concocted world shattering to pieces.
”TEAGAN!” I ROARED, BANGING on her bedroom door with my fist. ”For f.u.c.k's sake, don't be like this.”
”Go away,” I heard her scream seconds before music blared from her bedroom, obviously intending to block me out.
”You know what?” I roared, kicking the door once in frustration. ”f.u.c.king suit yourself,” I muttered as I turned around and walked away. My brows shot up in surprise when I walked out of her apartment and straight into...
”Colton?” I shook my head and gaped.
What the h.e.l.l...
”Noah?” Colt exclaimed, clearly puzzled, as he struggled to rebalance himself. ”What the h.e.l.l are you doing here, man?”
”I could ask you the same question,” I replied before embracing my nephew in a hug.
”Dad sent me to make sure Hope got her a.s.s on a plane home,” he told me with a grin. ”It's good to finally see you, man,” he added. ”It's been too long.”
I hadn't seen any of the Carter's since my mother's funeral. I knew it was a d.i.c.k move, but I had needed s.p.a.ce, time to come to terms with the path my life was going in. And time to take on board the fact that I had a family that wanted me. I'd never had that before them, and I had handled it all f.u.c.king wrong. ”I needed time, Colt,” I told him, hoping he would understand my seven year absence. ”I wasn't exactly in the right frame of mind back then,” I added in a gruff tone.
”Dude, shut the f.u.c.k up,” he chuckled, patting me on the back, before staggering through the open doorway of the girls apartment. ”I'm too drunk for this deep and meaningful talk.”
Laughing at Colton's easygoing disposition, I followed him back inside, choosing to remain in the doorway. ”Hard night?”
”Like you wouldn't believe.” I watched as Colton dug around in the fridge for a moment before removing the orange juice and swigging it straight from the carton. ”Dude, I'm totally wasted. It'll be a miracle if they let me board the airplane,” he told me with a grin.
”When are you guys leaving?” I asked, curious. Checking the time on my phone, I swore loudly when I saw that it was after six in the morning.
Christ, where the h.e.l.l had the time gone?
”Now,” I heard Hope reply as she staggered down the hallway with a pair of sungla.s.ses covering her eyes, and a baseball cap on her head, looking rougher than I'd ever seen her look before. The case she was carrying wasn't closed properly and items of clothing were hanging out.
”Come on, Colt, we're late,” she muttered, shoving her case into her brother's arms and pus.h.i.+ng him towards me.
Unfolding my arms, I stepped back to let them pa.s.s.
”Yes ma'am,” Colt replied, saluting me before he stepped through the doorway. ”Wait, where the f.u.c.k is the door?” I heard him ask himself in a puzzled tone before going out of sight.
”Oh yeah, mister-I-have-no-respect-for-other-people's-property,” Hope growled, poking me in the chest with her finger before rus.h.i.+ng down the hallway after her brother. ”You owe me a door.”
”I'll get it sorted,” I muttered, forcing myself not to laugh at Hope being all p.i.s.sy and hung-over.
When she reached the elevator the end of the hall, Hope swung around and said, ”Oh and one more thing, Uncle Noah.”
”I'm all ears, my favorite niece,” I shot back with a smirk.
Hope shook her head and pointed her finger at me. ”I heard you two doing the horizontal dance and if you hurt her again, I will personally hunt you down and kill you slowly. And I should warn you, Noah, I'm like a ghost you'll never see me coming for you.” Smiling, she added in a voice as sweet as honey, ”It was good to see you. Don't be a stranger,” before stepping into the elevator and disappearing from sight.
Scratching my head, I watched Hope leave, feeling confused and a little fearful for my safety. My phone vibrated in my pocket, and I didn't bother checking who it was before putting it to my ear. Besides, I knew full well who was calling.
”I'm on my way,” was all I managed to get in before an impressive string of curse words filled my eardrums.
”You can bet your a.s.s you're on your way,” was the first coherent sentence my trainer formed, followed quickly by, ”If you're not here in twenty minutes you're on your own, Messina. I'm not f.u.c.king around this time. I mean it...Hang on a second,” Quincy wheezed down the line, ”Are you drunk?”
”No,” I denied before shaking my head and letting out a sigh. ”A little bit,” I mumbled after a moment. ”Sorry.”
”You're a pain in my a.s.s, Messina,” he roared. ”Get your a.s.s out of whatever broad's bed you're lying in and over to the gym now!”
WHEN I WAS OUT OF HER APARTMENT BUILDING, and was sitting in the back a cab on the way to the gym, I found myself brooding over the woman whose bed I had just climbed out of.
f.u.c.king Teagan had been a huge mistake, not because I didn't want her I did, badly but because it only complicated an already messy situation.
Yeah the s.e.x had been incredible, and moving inside her was like nothing else I had ever experienced before it was like f.u.c.king ecstasy and coming home rolled into one; her soft, pliant body beneath me, taking what I was giving, pulling me in but emotionally nothing had changed. Teagan still blamed me for our relations.h.i.+p ending, and I still resented her for abandoning me. She had her own twisted beliefs on what happened that night and I had the truth. It wasn't like I had thought that one night together would miraculously erase seven years of hurt and pain, but I had hoped it would make some of the anger I had inside of me fade.
It hadn't.
I was still hurting worse now than ever.