Part 7 (1/2)

There was a long silence. ”You've suffered greatly, I know,” Obi-Wan said finally, his voice grave. ”But you are not alone, Ferus.” He spoke as if he could see inside Ferus's head.

Maybe he could.

The two men stood silently for several moments, absorbing the emotion of the situation, letting it flow through and between them. This was the Jedi way, to acknowledge, and move on.

Gradually, Ferus pulled himself together, accepting the new reality. As if sensing his ability to continue, Obi-Wan spoke. He told Ferus what had happened to him on Tatooine, how he and Luke had faced Darth Vader on the Death Star...how he had fallen.

”It's imperative that Luke not learn the truth about his father,” Obi-Wan said urgently.

”He's not ready.”

”I don't see how I can train him without revealing his past,” Ferus argued. ”It wouldn't be fair to him.”

”You won't be training him,” Obi-Wan said. ”Luke has learned all he needs to know for the moment, or at least all he can absorb. He needs time.”

”What he needs is a lightsaber lesson!” Ferus argued. ”Time won't give him control of the Force, or teach him how to fight the battles you know he will face.”

”But it will allow him to discover the kind of man he is.”

And without our guidance, what kind of man will he be? Ferus thought. Ferus thought. How will we How will we learn whether darkness dwells inside of him? learn whether darkness dwells inside of him?

But out of respect for the fallen Master, he kept this fear to himself.

”In other words, you want to watch and wait,” he said, instead. ”As usual.”

”The time when I could give you orders is long behind us,” Obi-Wan said. ”I can only ask that you trust me.”

”It would mean keeping my ident.i.ty from him,” Ferus warned. ”Allowing him to believe that he's truly alone.”

”He's not alone,” Obi-Wan pointed out. ”He has Leia.”

And so they came to the subject Ferus had been hoping to avoid. ”And Leia, what of her? You would have me continue to lie to her as well? Let her fight side by side with her brother, never knowing who he is-or what she she is?” is?”

”You have many secrets from her.”

It plagued him. Each morning, Ferus woke up, wondering, Is this the day? Will I Is this the day? Will I finally reveal everything? finally reveal everything? But something always held him back. But something always held him back. She wasn't ready She wasn't ready, he told himself. Not yet.

Now he wondered whether that was caution-or fear. While Luke seemed so youthful and naive, Leia was wise and strong. She was everything that Obi-Wan hoped Luke would become-even if Obi-Wan, so focused on Luke, couldn't see it.

Just like Anakin. Ferus immediately tried to squelch the thought. Obi-Wan had been so determined to see the best in Anakin, so sure that his Padawan was the Chosen One, superior to all others. How much had that certainty blinded him to the dangerous reality? Ferus immediately tried to squelch the thought. Obi-Wan had been so determined to see the best in Anakin, so sure that his Padawan was the Chosen One, superior to all others. How much had that certainty blinded him to the dangerous reality?

This was different, Ferus told himself. It was understandable that Obi-Wan focused on Luke, even to the point of overlooking Leia's potential. But Ferus had no such excuse. If Obi-Wan had deemed Luke ready for the truth-or part of it, at least-maybe he owed Leia the same.

”Only you know what Leia is capable of, and what she needs,” Obi-Wan said. Again, Ferus wondered if the Jedi Master could penetrate his thoughts. ”As I ask for your trust, I give you mine.”

Only then did Ferus realize how much he'd been hoping Obi-Wan would tell him what to do. Much as he hated taking orders, this was one decision he'd prefer leaving to someone else.

CHAPTER ELEVEN.

Hundreds of survivors crowded into the large chamber, their bodies packed together.

There was no s.p.a.ce large enough for the thousands of Alderaan survivors who would have wanted to attend a memorial. So these six hundred had been drawn by lot. Everyone else would-if they chose-watch a Live Holonet broadcast.

Var Lyonn introduced Leia, then stepped off the podium, joining Han behind the stage. ”She's rather magnificent, isn't she?” Lyonn murmured. Han, who didn't trust the man, answered with a terse nod.

But he agreed.

Leia stood before the crowd for several long moments without speaking. Han didn't know how she could stand it, staring out at their miserable faces. He looked away from them, up at the arched ceiling, its ribbons of colored transparisteel showering the room with dancing greens and blues.

”We will never replace what we have lost,” Leia said slowly. She spoke softly, but the circling ampdroids carried her voice throughout the chamber. ”We can only remember it.”

She pressed a b.u.t.ton on the podium, and a large viewscreen behind her flickered to life. There, in vibrant, living color, were the Alderaan gra.s.s seas. The skies alive with swooping thrantas. The polar sea s.h.i.+mmering with ice.

There were gasps from the audience. A few m.u.f.fled sobs. And then a solemn silence.

The images were unrelenting: The towering Oro Woods, threaded with glittering rainbow-colored lichen. The imposing Castle Lands, casting their solemn shadow over the surrounding plains. As a lost world flickered behind her, Leia spoke of the beauty of Alderaan and those who lived there. She spoke of the lives lost, never once mentioning the losses she'd personally suffered. That was something she never spoke of, Han had noticed.

Publicly, at least, she mourned the destruction of Alderaan as its sovereign-never as a fellow citizen who had lost her family and her home.

”Upon this stage is an empty capsule,” Leia told the crowd. ”And now I ask you, each of you, to fill it. With your memories and your keepsakes, with gifts for the ones you lost, with symbols and reminders of what you miss the most. There is a home here for each of your memories. And when this capsule is sealed, it will be jettisoned into s.p.a.ce. Into the debris field that exists where there should be a planet. I'm told that some call it the Graveyard, but I choose to believe that Alderaan lives on there, not in s.p.a.ce, but in spirit.

This capsule will do what all of us long to do, and never can. It will return home.”

There was a pause, so silent and still that it seemed the room had stopped breathing.

And then a young woman in the front row climbed onto the stage. She paused before the empty capsule, her lips moving soundlessly. Then she dropped a small, polished stone inside. Soon she was surrounded by survivors, eager to put something of their own in the capsule. They had come prepared. One by one, perfectly orderly, with frowns and sorry smiles and tears streaming, they filed past. Crowding the stage, the capsule, and when it was over, Leia. Their princess.

Han couldn't stand it. All this raw emotion-it wasn't his thing. ”Keep an eye on her, will ya?” he asked Chewbacca, who barked a yes. Han slipped outside, threading through the crowds of those who couldn't fit into the building but still wanted to be near.

Suddenly, Han spotted a familiar-looking mop of greasy hair. He shot out an arm and clamped his hand down on the kid's shoulder. ”You!”

It was the punk from the day before, the one who'd tried to scam them out of their credits. His eyes went wide with panic, and he tried to wriggle out of Han's grip, but Han held tight.

The other two boys approached, one obviously terrified, the other doing his best to look fierce. ”Let him go,” the bolder one ordered.

Han suppressed a grin. ”Or what?”

”Or...or...” He obviously couldn't come up with anything.

It was equally obvious he wasn't about to leave his friend behind. Han couldn't help but admire him, thief or not.

He glared at the kid straining against his grip. ”If I let you go, you promise not to disappear on me?”

”He doesn't promise anything,” the mouthy one said. ”You want to turn us in, go ahead. We're not going to help you.”

”Why would I want to turn you in?”