Part 13 (1/2)
”Wad ye ca' me a leear to my very face?
My faith, but ye craw crouse!
I tell you, Tib, I never will bear 't--”
”'Twas a moose”--”'Twas a rat”--”'Twas a moose.”
Wi' that she struck him ower the pow-- ”Ye dour auld doit, tak' that-- Gae to your bed, ye canker'd sumph-- 'Twas a rat.”--”'Twas a moose!”--”'Twas a rat!”
She sent the brose caup at his heels As he hirpled ben the hoose; Yet he shoved out his head, as he steekit the door, And cried, ”'Twas a moose, 'twas a moose!”
But when the carle fell asleep She paid him back for that, And roared into his sleepin' lug, ”'Twas a _rat_, 'twas a rat, 'twas a RAT!”
The devil be wi' me if I think It was a beast, at all-- Next morning, when she swepit the fluir, She found wee Johnnie's ball!
=A Ready Student=
Dr. Richie, of Edinburgh, though a very clever man, once met his match.
When examining a student as to the cla.s.ses he attended, he said: ”I understand you attend the cla.s.s for mathematics?”
”Yes.”
”How many sides has a circle?”
”Two,” said the student.
”Indeed! What are they?”
”An inside and an outside.”
A laugh among the students followed this answer.
The doctor next inquired: ”And you attend the moral philosophy cla.s.s, also?”
”Yes.”
”Well, you doubtless heard lectures on various subjects. Did you ever hear one on 'Cause and Effect?'”
”Yes.”
”Does an effect ever go before a cause?”
”Yes.”
”Give me an instance.”
”A barrow wheeled by a man.”