Part 4 (2/2)
”Why not?” she asked him.
Kelp said, ”I'm trying to explain this.”
”Right, right,” Dortmunder said. ”Go right ahead.”
”So the computer,” Kelp said, ”makes a model of the valley from before the water went in, with the towns and the buildings and everything, and we can turn the model any way we want-”
”What model?” Dortmunder demanded. He was getting lost here, and that made him mad. ”You wanna make like a model train set? What is this?”
”The model in the computer,” Kelp told him. ”You see it on your screen.”
”The television, you mean.”
”Very like television, yes,” Kelp agreed. ”And it's this detailed three-dimensional model, and you can turn it around and tilt it different ways-”
”Sounds like fun,” Dortmunder said acidly.
”And,” Kelp insisted, ”you can blow up part of it bigger, to get the details and all, and then your, uh, this, uh, this fella who buried it, he shows us on the model where he buried the box, and then we input the reservoir and-”
”You what?”
”Input the reservoir,” Kelp repeated, unhelpfully, but then he added, ”Our first model in the program is the valley from when the towns were there. So we can pinpoint the box. Then we tell the PC about the reservoir, and put in the dam, and fill the water in, and probably tell it how much water weighs and all that, so it can tell us what might be different down there at the bottom now.” A shadow of doubt crossed Kelp's eager face. ”There's a lot of data we're gonna have to get,” he said, ”if we're gonna do this right. Guy-go, you know.”
”No,” Dortmunder told him. ”Guy-go I don't know.”
”You never heard that expression?” Kelp was astonished.
”May probably did.”
”No, I don't think so,” May said.
”Guy-go,” Kelp repeated, then spelled it. ”G, I, G, O. It means 'Garbage In, Garbage Out.' ”
”That's nice,” Dortmunder said.
”It means,” Kelp amplified, ”the computer's only as smart as what you tell it. If you give it wrong information, it'll give you wrong information back.”
”I'm beginning to see,” Dortmunder said. ”This is a machine that doesn't know anything until I tell it something, and if I tell it wrong it believes me.”
”That's about it, yes,” Kelp agreed.
”So this machine of yours,” Dortmunder said, ”needs me a lot more than I need it.”
”Now, there you go, being negative again,” Kelp complained.
May said, ”John, let Andy finish about this. Maybe it will help.”
”I'm just sitting here,” Dortmunder said, and tried to drink from an empty beer can. ”I'm sitting here listening, not making any trouble.”
”I'll get more beer,” May decided.
As she got to her feet, Kelp said, ”I'll wait for you to come back.”
”Thank you, Andy.”
While May was out of the room, Kelp said, ”Actually, if we could work this out, that's a lot of money.”
”It is,” Dortmunder agreed.
”I'm not saying necessarily a tunnel,” Kelp said, ”but whatever, probably wouldn't take a lot of guys. Your old-This, uh, guy, he's seventy years old, huh?”
”Yeah.”
”How strong is he?”
”Very.”
”Well, that's fine,” Kelp said. ”So he can carry his weight. Then you and me. And a driver, probably.”
”Absolutely,” Dortmunder said. ”I drove up there once already. That's enough. We'll call Stan Murch, if it looks like we've got something.”
”And maybe Tiny Bulcher, for the lifting and the moving around,” Kelp suggested as May came back with three more beers. ”Thanks, May.”
May said to Dortmunder, ”I already opened yours, John.”
”Thanks.”
”You know,” Kelp said, popping open his beer can with casual skill, ”your old- This guy, uh...”
”Tom,” Dortmunder said. ”His name is Tom.”
”Well, I'll try it,” Kelp said. ”Tom. This Tom sounds a lot like Tiny. In fact, I'm looking forward to meeting him.”
Dortmunder muttered, ”Better you than me.”
”Anyhoo,” Kelp said, ”we were talking about the PC.”
Dortmunder looked at him. ” 'Anyhoo'?”
”The PC,” Kelp insisted. ”Come on, John.”
”Okay, okay.”
”It's true,” Kelp said, ”we have to get a lot of information to put into the computer, but that's nothing different. You always want the best information you can get anyway, in any job. That's the way you work.”
<script>