128 Choice, which I don’t have i (1/2)

Is it worth?

I close my eyes, then open again, and continue to look at the ceiling.

I dare not even close my eyes, because once I close it, it seems as if I see Jim standing in front of me and say to me coldly, ”I'm sorry, little 5.”

Sorry?

Sorry?!

I unconsciously pull a smile from the corner of my mouth, then I glance at the fat fellow's face and slowly say, ”I... I don't know.”

His face is calm, then he comes up and put half of his cigarette in my mouth and let me take a breath. This action makes me feel warm.

”I feel terrible.” I squeeze these words out of my mouth and look at him. For a moment, I'm feeling very weak. Really weak!

”I understand.” ”It's normal for you to feel bad now,” he says lightly. There's a slight mockery in his eyes: ”Do you believe me now?”

”What?”

”Remember what I told you the day before yesterday?” He says coldly, ”There is no kindness in the world that you can repay with your life, except for your own parents.”

I raise my finger, struggle for once. He takes the cigarette for me again. This time, he simply leaves half of the cigarette on my mouth and lights another one for himself.

”I used to regard Juan as my father.” I grit my teeth and look at fat fellow. He's stunned for a moment, eyes slowly falling on my face: ”Father?”

”Yes.” I smile, but my eyes are wet: ”When I went to school, my parents were gone. Later, I had a master who was the first great benefactor in my life. Unfortunately, he died early and I could not repay him. Juan is the second. He gave me alomost everything. He gave me job, good payment, trains and trusts. He looked up to me, took me as his confidence...”

I speak calmly. Say what happened when I was with Juan. Say how Juan promoted me from a dish boy. Say Juan asked me to practice boxing together, sauna with him, then rub his back. At that time, he was really like my father!

I speak slowly. Fat fellow does not interrupt, just listening quietly, and listening all the time.

After listening, he suddenly sighs, stands up and goes to the window. He looks out with his back to me and then suddenly laughing with sarcastic. ”Juan seems to have misread this time!”

”...” I look at him, somewhat puzzling.

He turns and stares at me. ”It's a pity! Juan is tough enough and skilled enough to control people. Unfortunately, he misread you! He really misread you, kid!”

I still utter no word.

He flickes the soot quickly and says lightly, ”I didn't expect you to be such a person! Boy, I was wrong on you too. You are not only persistent, but also too stubborn that you don't know how to live or die! If Juan is smarter, hey! If I were him, I would find you directly and tell you face to face that I'm facing death. If you don't die, I'll be dead. If I were him, I would not send people to kill you, but to tell you these words in person. With your personality and his position in your heart, I can almost be sure that you would even die for him voluntarily without his sending someone to kill you!”

At this point, he's laughing as if he has seen the most ridiculous thing in the world: ”The smarter the more foolish! Juan, you've done a stupid thing this time!”

After laughing enough, he sighs, looks at me, thinking about it, and sighs, ”Actually... Nor can he be said to be foolish, but in his way of thinking, it is impossible to think of the possibility of voluntary sacrifice on your own initiative.”

I'm silent.

Indeed, if Juan hadn't sent someone to kill me, he would have calmly told me face to face that if I hadn't died, it would have been impossible to solve, and he would have died himself. In such a situation, maybe I would really die for him!

No... Not ”maybe”, that's almost certain!

”It is impossible for selfish people to understand the selflessness.” Fat fellow smiles, shakes his head and sighs,”Actually Juan also really had no idea already. Subordinate like you, there's no boss won't like! There are too few loyal people nowadays. You are willing to serve him, abandon your love and life to save her daughter to escape. Such sentiment, which boss does not like? He wants your life just for self-preservation. What morality, what kindness, really at the critical moment of life and death, they just think of themselves. Nor can he be regarded as selfish, but morally speaking, it's too chilling for you to do so!”

I still have no words.

I just feel very disappointed.

My heart is as freeze as an ice!

With a reluctant smile, I gasp and say, ”Thank you anyway.”

He shakes his hand. ”I may not be a good man. I just think that it's a pity that a boy like you would die like this. So I just try to save your life.”

I really feel ridiculous.

Juan, I have tried my best to protect his daughter's life, I insisted on not giving up, but he wants to kill me at last! And an complete stranger fat fellow saved my life just because I pleasing to his eyes

I sigh, ”Where is this place?”

”A safe place.” Fat fellow smiles and says, ”That doctor is good, isn't he? He just has a bad temper. He was medical soldier He and I used to carry guns and been to battlefields. Now he's a veterinarian. But the medical skill is really good. Don't worry, if he said that if you won't die, you won't die. That fellow's face smells a little bit, but his eyes are still very accurate.”

Then he comes up to me, touches the bandage on my body gently, and laughs, ”Unfortunately you have good skin and flesh and look very energetic, but you'll have many scars later on. Within so many scars, it must be frightening to wear less clothes in summer. Finding a girlfriend is likely to be affected.”

How can I'm interested in talking about this now? I just bitter smile and say nothing. Fat fellow raises his eyebrows and laughing, ”Well, actually you don't have to worry about it. A man living without depand on appearances! Only women live on their fucking pretty faces! Men with the ability to do everything! ”

He sits down slowly and looks at me. ”What do you want to do after that?”

”I don't know yet.”

I'm telling the truth.

I really don't know what else I can do. I don't know where the road is.

Originally, my goal was to protect Dorra and send the girl to Juan safely. Now that this thing is over but Juan is going to kill me. Who else can I find? Where else can I go?

”Hate?” Fat fellow looks at my face and suddenly asks.

”Hate? Not hate?” I shake my head and my neck has moved the wound. I feel very pain, ”I can't tell.”

Just then, the door is knocked outside.

Fat fellow frowns and shouts, ”Doc, knock your ass! Don't you have a key?”

No one answers, just still knocking.

”Bang Bang! Bang!”

Three knocks, two long, one short.

Fat fellow's face becomes heavy at once. He slowly stands up, glances at me quickly, then looks at the door, muttering to himself, ”Damn, this guy is really dead-hearted.”

Slowly he reaches under my bed and pulls out a pistol under the bedplate. He looks at me coldly: ”Lie still.”