Part 31 (1/2)
Which meant Tess had pulled the trigger.
Hugh s.h.i.+fted to human form and shot to his feet, anxious to wrap his arms around her. He had no idea how long he'd been lost in his musings but he suspected it was longer than he'd thought.
Because Tess was gone.
Chapter Eighteen.
The surf at Maverick's Beach pounded Tess wave after wave. Salt.w.a.ter entered her nose and mouth with each crash that followed the towering wall of water. Her eyes stung. Her lips burned. Every limb suffered from exhaustion. And yet the punishment from the roughest surf in Northern California wasn't enough to pull her under and set her free.
That was what she wanted.
She wanted the ocean to swallow her, take her away from her life and make her forget. Forget about everyone and everything, and float into the depths of the mind-numbing frigid water.
Wasn't it?
But as she marched out of the bitter cold ocean and onto the soft, sandy sh.o.r.e, her surfboard tucked under her arm, all she could think about was staying. With Hugh. And how he'd broken down the walls around her heart. How he'd known her better than she knew herself. How he wanted her to be his mate.
Hugh had led her away from the world she knew and set her heart free. She couldn't stop remembering how it felt to be in his arms, to laugh with him, to care more about someone than she thought possible.
That night in San Diego had been the worst of her life. She'd killed a human being. She knew Christian's gun had mercury bullets, so without hesitation, she'd taken her shot. Her aim never faltered. Not even with only a sliver of light to guide her. But the impact of what she'd done had immediately swamped her with shame and guilt and fear. She'd needed to escape before Hugh could discover it. She needed to run and keep running.
So that was what she did.
She didn't regret her actions. Hugh's life took precedence over everything else. He was the destination at the end of the dark and lonely road, the whisper that whisked all her worries away. He'd made her think about things in a new light, and she didn't want to go back.
She'd repeatedly told herself that the knowledge he was alive was enough.
”Rack off!” Kensie said, pulling Tess from her thoughts. She was waving her arms frantically back and forth to shoo the seagull edging a little too close in its search of dropped food.
Tess let go of her board and collapsed onto the towel next to her friend.
A couple of quiet minutes later, she turned to her side. Her elbow sunk into the towel as she propped her head in her hand. ”What day is it?”
”Friday. Which means we only have two more days before we need to be back at work.” Kensie licked her fingertips to rid them of the orange from the Cheetos she'd been eating.
”I've been thinking about that.”
Kensie pulled her hand away from her mouth and turned her head. ”You have? Oh my G.o.d, Tess! Your lips are blue.” She jumped up and grabbed another towel.
The sun hid behind gray clouds. The crisp air carried a strong salt.w.a.ter breeze. The only other inhabitants on the beach were a couple of other surfers, an older guy with a metal detector and a few pesky birds.
”Thanks,” Tess said, accepting the towel Kensie put around her. ”But I really should get out of this wetsuit first.” She stood, reached behind her back, and yanked the zipper down and the suit off. Gooseb.u.mps p.r.i.c.kled her skin as she pulled her sweats.h.i.+rt and sweatpants on before burying herself under the towel.
”So back to work,” Kensie said. ”Are you ready to talk about it? Talk about what happened that made you disappear for a week?” She paused, eyes narrowed. ”And if it has anything to do with Christian's death.”
Good onya, Tess. Ask a question and look where it gets you. Who gives a s.h.i.+t what day of the week it is. And if she added in this mini-vacation with Kensie, she'd been gone almost two weeks.
After fleeing the hotel room in San Diego, Tess had hopped on a train and rode for days. The pa.s.sing scenery, constant motion and continuous hum of pa.s.sengers supplied enough distraction for her to remain close to sane. Eventually her stiff body couldn't take any more of the railroad, though, and she'd had to pump some adrenaline back into her system. She'd ended up at Half Moon Bay to surf, hang glide and bike ride until she couldn't feel her legs.
She'd hoped that if she jumped back into her favorite pastimes everything would go back to normal. But it hadn't.
”How would I know about his death? You were the one who tracked me down to tell me.”
Thank G.o.d for that too. Tess had been so relieved to find out her friends were okay. Christian had sent them each on secret a.s.signment and told them no contact with anyone whatsoever. She had no idea what would have happened to them upon their return if things had gone down differently in San Diego, and chose not to even think about it.
”Yeah, after you mysteriously vanished. It's a good thing Francesca and I love you enough to find you. She called, by the way. Wanted to let us know when we get back that she'll still be on a.s.signment.”
”I'm not going back.”
”Don't be a dill, Tess. What are you talking about?”
”I'm talking about being through. I'm tired.” She tightened the towel around and underneath her cold feet.
”It's all you know. It's all we know.” Kensie laughed off her confession and looked at her like she'd just flapped her arms and acted like a chicken.
Tess pinched her temples with her hand.
”Wait. You're serious?” Kensie's face clouded with confusion. ”I wish you'd tell me what's really going on. You've been acting strange ever since I got here.”
”Nothing's going on. I'm just-”
”You're different, Tess. Whatever happened on your last a.s.signment changed you. But that doesn't mean you can't go back. Francesca says the new boss isn't so bad. She even told me he's kind of cute. Which, if we know Francesca, means he's ripper.” She paused and looked out toward the ocean. Silence pa.s.sed between them before Kensie said very softly, ”You can trust me you know. With your secrets.”
Where would she even begin? She stared at her friend's profile and wondered if she'd feel better if she did tell Kensie everything. But there was so much she didn't know about that night.
She didn't know how the mess at the hotel had been taken care of. Obviously, Hugh had seen to it that the deaths of Dane and her boss were handled discreetly because according to Kensie, the staff at P.I.E. had been told he'd died of a heart attack while out of the country on a business trip. His body had supposedly been flown home and immediately cremated.
She'd no idea how Dane's death was explained to the Night Runners, but was positive Hugh had given him a proper burial, no matter his betrayal to the pack. Hugh was decent, unselfish, a true leader, and he'd give Dane praises for the sake of his pack. She wondered several times a day about the Night Runners and if anything more had transpired with the Wolf Seekers. Did Dane's death put an end to the rife or fuel greater animosity? And every night she prayed Trey was okay, that whatever had taken place in Los Angeles that night hadn't caused him harm. Something told her everything was all right, though. Good always defeated evil, didn't it?
Then there was Hugh. Not a second went by that she didn't miss him something fierce. She longed to be in his arms, feel his warmth, share his air. Her every thought included him. At night when she couldn't fall asleep, she'd let herself drift to his bedroom, his office, the hotel room. All the places they'd devoured each other. All the places he'd wors.h.i.+pped her body while injecting her heart with love.
”I fell in love with my mark,” she finally said, her body relaxing at her admission.
Kensie whipped her head to the side. ”You what?” She took a slow, deep breath. ”You fell in love with a Veiler?”
”Yes. He's a wolfen.” A tidal wave of emotions swamped Tess. Saying she loved Hugh out loud overwhelmed her with the courage to tell Kensie everything.
Her friend's sympathetic eyes gave her the rea.s.surance to continue.
”I didn't eliminate him.”
Contemplation washed over Kensie's face. Her brows furrowed and she rubbed a few fingers across her mouth and chin. A full minute went by before she spoke. ”Did he deserve it? I mean they all do, don't they?”
That was the best question Kensie could ask, and it opened the floodgates.
A half hour later, the skies brightening as rays of suns.h.i.+ne poked through the gloomy sky, Tess finished talking. She'd told Kensie everything-well, except for the details of the amazing s.e.x. Those memories were hers alone. Sharing what had happened in San Diego, and Kensie telling her she understood, helped lessen the burden of what she'd done. She breathed easy for the first time since that night. The tide stretched farther up the sand, almost touching her toes.