Part 39 (1/2)
”I know why you say that.”
”It's just what I'm explaining.”
”I couldn't have held out if I hadn't been so sure of Miriam,” said Mrs.
Rooth.
”Well, you needn't hold out any longer.”
”Don't _you_ trust her?” asked Sherringham's hostess.
”Trust her?”
”You don't trust yourself. That's why you were silent, why we might have thought you were dead, why we might have perished ourselves.”
”I don't think I understand you; I don't know what you're talking about,” Peter returned. ”But it doesn't matter.”
”Doesn't it? Let yourself go. Why should you struggle?” the old woman agreeably inquired.
Her unexpected insistence annoyed her visitor, and he was silent again, meeting her eyes with reserve and on the point of telling her that he didn't like her tone. But he had his tongue under such control that he was able presently to say instead of this--and it was a relief to him to give audible voice to the reflexion--”It's a great mistake, either way, for a man to be in love with an actress. Either it means nothing serious, and what's the use of that? or it means everything, and that's still more delusive.”
”Delusive?”
”Idle, unprofitable.”
”Surely a pure affection is its own beautiful reward,” Mrs. Rooth pleaded with soft reasonableness.
”In such a case how can it be pure?”
”I thought you were talking of an English gentleman,” she replied.
”Call the poor fellow whatever you like: a man with his life to lead, his way to make, his work, his duties, his career to attend to. If it means nothing, as I say, the thing it means least of all is marriage.”
”Oh my own Miriam!” Mrs. Rooth wailed.
”Fancy, on the other hand, the complication when such a man marries a woman who's on the stage.”
Mrs. Rooth looked as if she were trying to follow. ”Miriam isn't on the stage yet.”
”Go to London and she soon will be.”
”Yes, and then you'll have your excuse.”
”My excuse?”
”For deserting us altogether.”
He broke into laughter at this, the logic was so droll. Then he went on: ”Show me some good acting and I won't desert you.”
”Good acting? Ah what's the best acting compared with the position of a true English lady? If you'll take her as she is you may have her,” Mrs.
Rooth suddenly added.