Part 27 (2/2)

”Yes,” said Miss Marley; ”but he'll mind more if he ruins your life.

You see, you won't think you're ruined, but Winn will think so. He'll believe he's ruined the woman he loves, and after a little time, when his pa.s.sion has ceased to ride him blind, he'll never hold up his head again. You'll be responsible for that.” It sounded cruel, but it was not cruel. Miss Marley knew that as long as she laid the responsibility at Claire's door, Claire would not think her cruel.

Claire repeated slowly after her:

”I should be responsible for that!” Then she said: ”Oh, how silly laws are! How silly! As if any one could be ruined who simply loved!”

”We should probably be sillier without laws,” Miss Marley observed. ”And you must remember they have their recommendations: they keep silly people comparatively safe.”

”Safe!” said Claire. ”I think that's the emptiest, poorest word there is! Who wants to be safe?”

”You wouldn't think so if you had a child,” said Miss Marley, quietly.

”You would need safety then, and you would learn to prize it.”

Claire bowed her head into her hands.

”Oh, why can't I have one now! Why can't I?” she whispered brokenly.

Miss Marley bit her lips; she had hoped Claire was too young for this particular stab.

”Because he'd think it wrong,” said Miss Marley after a pause, ”and because of Peter. He's got that obligation. The two would clash.”

Claire rose slowly to her feet.

”I'll just go and tell him about the pa.s.s,” she said quietly. ”When it's over I'll begin to think; but I needn't really think till then, need I?

Because I feel as if I couldn't just now; it would stop my going on.”

Miss Marley said that she was quite sure that Claire need not begin to think at present and privately she hoped that, when that hour came, something might happen which would deaden thought. She was thankful to remember that the worst of feeling is always over before the worst of thinking can begin. But Claire was too young to comfort herself with the limitations of pain. She only knew that she must tell Winn about the pa.s.s and seem for a moment at least, in his eyes, not to trust him.

Nevertheless, she smiled at Miss Marley before she left her, because she didn't want Miss Marley to feel upset; and Miss Marley accepted this rea.s.surance with an answering smile until the door was shut.

CHAPTER XXVI

When Claire found Winn at the bridge-table she saw at a glance that he was not in the mood for renunciations. His eyes had the hard, s.h.i.+ning stare that was the danger-signal of the Staines family. He shot a glance at Claire as if she were a hostile force and he was taking her measure.

He was putting her outside himself in order to fight her. It was as if he knew instinctively that their wills were about to clash. When the rubber was over, he got up and walked straight to her.

”You put me off my game,” he said grimly. ”I can see you're up to something; but we can't talk here.”

”Let's talk to-morrow,” she urged, ”not now. I thought perhaps you'd like to come and listen to the music with me; there is music in the hall.”

”You did, did you?” he replied in the same hard voice. ”Well, you were mistaken. Go up-stairs to my room and wait for me. It's number 28, two or three doors beyond Miss Marley's sitting-room. I'll follow you.”

An older woman would have hesitated, and if Claire had hesitated, Winn would never have forgiven her. But her youth was at once her danger and her protection.

She would rather have waited till to-morrow, because she saw that Winn was in a difficult mood; but she had no idea what was behind his mood.

She went at once.

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