Part 30 (1/2)
”But McHoots is in Inverlochty, in Scotland.”
”Never mind. Get him; tell him to name his own terms. When is the Amateur Champions.h.i.+p?”
”I think it is on September the twelfth this year.”
”All right, take dictation. September twelfth win Amateur Champions.h.i.+p.”
I stared at him in amazement, but he was not looking at me.
”Got that?” he said. ”September thir--Oh, I was forgetting! Add September twelfth, corner wheat. September thirteenth, marry Amelia.”
”Marry Amelia,” I echoed, moistening my pencil.
”Where do you play this--what's-its-name--golf?”
”There are clubs all over the country. I belong to the Wissahicky Glen.”
”That a good place?”
”Very good.”
”Arrange today for my becoming a member.”
Sandy McHoots arrived in due course, and was shown into the private office.
”Mr. McHoots?” said Vincent Jopp.
”Mphm!” said the Open Champion.
”I have sent for you, Mr. McHoots, because I hear that you are the greatest living exponent of this game of golf.”
”Aye,” said the champion, cordially. ”I am that.”
”I wish you to teach me the game. I am already somewhat behind schedule owing to the delay incident upon your long journey, so let us start at once. Name a few of the most important points in connection with the game. My secretary will make notes of them, and I will memorize them.
In this way we shall save time. Now, what is the most important thing to remember when playing golf?”
”Keep your heid still.”
”A simple task.”
”Na sae simple as it soonds.”
”Nonsense!” said Vincent Jopp, curtly. ”If I decide to keep my head still, I shall keep it still. What next?”
”Keep yer ee on the ba'.”
”It shall be attended to. And the next?”
”Dinna press.”