Part 25 (1/2)
”Jack? What's wrong?”
He wasn't looking at my face. He was staring at my shoulder. When my s.h.i.+rt had gotten caught, it had slipped out of place, revealing part of my mark for a split second. It now reached from my collarbone to the edge of my shoulder.
”It's getting bigger.”
I shoved my s.h.i.+rt even farther up to the base of my neck and tried to keep my voice calm. ”What are you talking about?”
Before he could answer, I turned and started clearing off a table, but then Jack's hand clamped on my shoulder and he yanked me around. ”Don't tell me you haven't noticed.”
I shrugged his hand off. ”Okay, yeah, it's growing a little.”
”That's not a little, Becks. It's covering your entire shoulder. What is it?”
I sighed. ”I told you. It's just something that appeared when I was ... gone. It's nothing. I can't even feel it.”
”Why is it growing? Regular tattoos don't grow.”
”I don't know. Maybe it will go back down, or go away someday.”
He paused. ”Shouldn't you see a doctor...? Don't give me that look, Becks.”
”I think you know a doctor can't help.”
He took two tentative steps toward me, closing the distance between us. He took the broom out of my hand and leaned it against the wall, then he reached up and pushed my s.h.i.+rt aside, exposing the mark all the way to the end of my shoulder.
His fingers were rough and callused against my neck and shoulders, but they were soft, too.
”Up close, it doesn't look quite like a tattoo.”
”How would you know?”
One corner of his lip pulled up into a sort of smile and he pushed his own sleeve back, exposing his right forearm. Black markings covered the inside, just underneath the crease of his elbow.
”What is it?”
He ignored my question. ”My tattoo looks like ink on skin, whereas yours”-he focused once again on my own mark- ”doesn't. Your skin doesn't feel different,” he said, looking closer, tracing the edge of the mark. I could feel his breath. I smelled the sweet and rustic scent of his aftershave. ”It's almost like the black color is coming from beneath your skin, not from the skin itself. And it can't be a burn, because the skin isn't distorted in any way.”
”No. It's not,” I whispered.
”And it's not raised, like a scar would be.... Becks? Are you okay? Did I say something wrong?”
I realized I was straining my head away from him and squeezing my eyes shut. I opened them and found Jack studying my face. I wanted him more than anything. ”No. I'm fine. I was just ... thinking.”
He cracked a smile. ”Does thinking hurt you these days?”
”No.” I took a step back. He couldn't possibly guess what the mark meant, but I wasn't going to take the chance.
Jack watched me carefully. I kept backing up, dragging my hand along the wall as I did.
”Where are you going?”
He can't know. I can't do this to him. ”I have somewhere ... something to do. Christopher can clean up by himself.”
”Becks?” He held his hands out, palms down.
”You can leave too, I'm sure. You've already done so much. And thanks ... for helping out today, okay?”
”You're running.”
I shook my head. I had reached the swinging doors that led to the hallway and out to the parking lot. ”It's late. I have to go. I'll see you later.”
Before he could protest, I slipped out the door and started a slow jog toward my car. But I stopped when I saw that Cole, as his blond self, was leaning against the side of the Rabbit, like he knew the exact moment I would be rus.h.i.+ng out to the car.
”Hi, honey. How was work?” He grinned.
I ignored him and dug around for the car keys in my purse, keeping my eyes on him. When I had them in my hand, I started walking toward the car again.
I held the car key out, pointed and ready.
Cole eyed the key. ”Uh-oh. Is that key loaded?”
”I'm in a hurry.” I made it to the car, but Cole held his ground in front of the driver's-side door.
”That's nice that Jack wants to feed the dregs of society. He's here now, isn't he?”
”How did you know?”
His eyes narrowed in a sly way. ”Jules came to me. Crying. She said Jack couldn't stay away from you. She asked me to take the pain away. Begged me to take the pain away. Said she wants to stop feeling.”
For the just briefest moment, I believed him, and I hated myself for hurting someone else, especially Jules. He knew I was vulnerable where she was concerned. She was my friend, and Cole knew I had come back for my friends and family. ”Jules doesn't even know you.”
”Maybe not formally. But she is hurting. All I needed to do was taste her pain at the little scented-candle stand at the mall today to know that Jack was with you. You know she works at the Scentsy candle shop on Sat.u.r.days.”
”They're not together. Jack doesn't feel that way about her.”
”But he could.” He tilted his head. ”Maybe if you hadn't Returned, they'd be a couple. Can you really do this to your best friend?”
It wasn't my fault they weren't together. At least, that's what I tried to believe. ”I can't help it if Jack still has feelings for me,” I said. It was the first blatant lie I'd told Cole in reference to Jack. I had no idea how Jack felt about me anymore.
Cole looked at the soup kitchen, then back at me. ”If that's true, why isn't he with you? Leaving with you?”
”Because...” My voice dropped off. ”He had to clean up.”
Cole's lip pulled up. ”He'd rather clean for free than be with you? Ouch.”
”Just move,” I said.
”Becks!” Jack jogged casually until he reached me, not even sparing one glance at Cole. He put both hands on my arms and pulled me toward him. ”Sorry I took so long in there. I couldn't remember where you told me to put the mops.”
He put an arm around me protectively and drew me close, away from Cole.