Part 20 (1/2)

”Yeah.”

”Good different?”

He paused. ”Yeah.”

”I'm sorry, Jack. I know exactly how you feel, because I felt it too my first time.” When Cole fed off me. I couldn't believe I'd just done the same thing to Jack. How did I let it come to this?

”Your first time?” He grabbed his gla.s.ses off the nightstand and wiped them with the sleeve of his s.h.i.+rt. ”Then start there. Tell me what happened.”

”I'll try. You remember leaving for football camp?”

”Yeah.” Jack rubbed his eyes with the palms of his hands and put his gla.s.ses on. ”It was the last time I talked to you. You were standing with Cole. Is that when you started to hang out with him?”

”Yes. Going to concerts. Stuff like that.” I bit my lip. ”Look, I'm just going to try to keep talking, and it may not make sense at first, but if I stop, I won't be able to start again.” Jack nodded. ”Cole took me rafting one day, with the rest of the band. They wanted to shoot the Tube, and they invited me.”

Jack shook his head. ”Shooting the Tube after the spring runoff?”

”I know. Not the smartest move.” I squeezed my eyes shut for a moment. ”We hit a rock and I fell out.”

He drew in a sharp breath. ”He never should have taken you. You're not big enough. Were you hurt?”

”The current dragged me under, and as I kicked to the surface, my leg caught on a branch or rock or something. I couldn't get it free. I practically had to rip my leg off to get to the surface again, and when I did I was bleeding. A lot.”

I closed my eyes, remembering strong hands pulling me to the bank of the river. ”Hang on, Nik. You'll be okay,” Cole said.

”Keep talking. What happened next?” Jack said.

I opened my eyes. ”I was lying on the bank. Pressing on the gash.” Red liquid had seeped between my fingers.

”I can make it go away,” Cole said. ”Do you want me to take the pain away?”

Jack placed his hand on my ankle and urged my leg straight. He pushed the hem of my jeans up. The raised skin of my scar twisted from my s.h.i.+n around to the back of my calf in a jagged line.

”Oh,” Jack said. He lightly touched the scar and traced the line. ”It's deep.”

I nodded and watched his hand on my leg, his callused fingers on my skin. Goose b.u.mps appeared and I s.h.i.+vered.

”Are you cold?”

I shook my head and tucked my leg back in, pulling my jeans leg down in the process.

”What happened next?”

”Cole said he could make it feel better. And I let him.”

LAST YEAR.

The sh.o.r.e of the rapids. One week before the Feed.

The s.h.i.+vers were violent enough that my teeth bit into my tongue several times. I could taste blood. But I didn't care, because all I could think about was the pain in my leg. It was so bad, I wondered if the leg was still attached, or if it had been ripped off and was floating down the river somewhere.

”She's in shock,” a voice said above me.

”My leg,” I said. Speaking made me choke. There had to be some river water down my throat. I coughed, throwing up water.

Strong hands helped turn me over, so I wouldn't puke lying on my back.

”You're okay, Nik.” Cole's voice.

I needed someone to tell me if I still had my leg. I tried to point to my leg, but my arms flailed about.

”Whoa. Settle down.” His voice was soothing. ”You're fine.”

”Dude, it's gus.h.i.+ng blood.”

”Shut it, Gavin,” Cole growled. ”Take off your jacket.”

I heard fabric tearing and felt pressure on my leg. ”This might hurt a little,” Cole said.

Then the real pain hit. Like a hot poker jabbing through the skin and muscle of my leg, burning as it tore its way to my bone.

I screamed. I had to get away from the poker. I thrashed and twisted, trying to free myself.

”Nik! Stay still.”

I screamed again and shook my head. Two hands clenched my shoulders, and I heard Cole's voice.

”Nik. Open your eyes.” I did. Cole's face was inches from mine. ”Do you want me to take the pain away?”

”Cole!” Maxwell said from somewhere behind him.

Cole kept his eyes on me, but he shook his head. ”It's not your decision, Max.”

”But the exposure,” Max said.

”Enough!” Cole growled. ”It'll work out.”

Maxwell didn't say anything else. I could barely keep my eyes open; the pain in my leg was making everything else blurry, but Cole wouldn't let me move.

”Do you, Nik? Do you want me to help with the pain?”

I nodded, keeping my mouth shut so I wouldn't scream again.

”Tell me. Tell me what you want.”

”Please,” I said, and then I gasped and tried to grab my leg, but Cole had me pinned. ”Make it go away.”