Part 36 (1/2)

It was the worst weather that portion of Europe had seen in G.o.d knew how long. Storm clouds rose like swollen purple bladders blown up to monstrous proportions in the sky, and swept in filled with a rain that seemed to possess a living malevolence. The wind blew the lances out of men's hands. When the wind caught a s.h.i.+eld from behind, it converted it into a sail, and if the holder of the s.h.i.+eld happened to lose his balance it could blow him halfway across the countryside. Rain lashed at everything. Whipped by the wind into ultratiny drops driven with extraordinary force, it managed to penetrate every crack and crevice of armor or clothing.

Sir Oliver had to scream into his a.s.sistant's ear in order to be heard. ”We'd better take shelter!”

”Aye, sir, it seems the only course. But how are we to pa.s.s the order? Who will hear us in this racket?”

”Something is amiss,” Oliver said. ”We'd better inform Antonio.” For thus he still referred to Azzie.

”He's nowhere around, my lord.”

”You must find him at once!”

”Yes, sir. But where?” The two men looked at each other, and then at the wide gray rain-soaked plain upon which they stood.

Chapter 4.

Zeus wasn't content with simply serving up foul weather. He and all his children began working on separate schemes to let mankind know they were back.

Zeus left the company of the G.o.ds. He wanted to check out the human condition in its current state.

First he visited Greece. As he had feared, Greek strength of arms had slipped downhill badly since the grand old days of Agamemnon.

He looked around to see what other armies might be available. The rest of the forces of Western Europe were all engaged in one struggle or another. What he needed was a new force of men. He knew now just where he wanted to send them-barreling right down through the heart of Europe into Italy. He was going to start a new kingdom for himself there. His army would conquer, and they would make sure everyone wors.h.i.+ped him'-or they would make war on those who did not. As their reward, he would deal them out glory and treachery. It was the old way, and the old way was always best, especially when it was b.l.o.o.d.y.

But first he had to find a pythoness who could tell him where there was an unoccupied army. A quick consultation of the Prophets' Directory helped him locate the Pythoness of Delphi, currently disguised as a washerwoman in a restaurant in Salonika.

In Salonika he withdrew the cloud of darkness into a large bladder and corked it so that it would be ready if he wanted to use it again. Then he went to the central agora and inquired for the washerwoman on the Main Baths. A fish merchant pointed the way. Zeus went past the ruined coliseum and the decayed horseracing ground, and there she was - a careworn old lady with her large tortoise sh.e.l.l that washerwomen used for wash buckets.

The pythoness had to take a disguise and do her prophesying in secret because the Church didn't allow pythonesses to continue in their familiar trade. Even owning a constrictor-type snake was against the law as ”tending toward forbidden magical practices in the old outlawed style.” But this pythoness still did private readings for friends and certain disaffected aristocrats.

Zeus went to her well wrapped in a cloak, but she recognized him at once.

”I need a reading,” he told her.

”Oh, this is the finest day in my life,” the pythoness said. ”To think that I would ever meet one of the old G.o.ds face to face... Oh, just tell me what I can do for you.”

”I want you to go into your trance and find out where I can get an army.”

”Yes, sir. But since your son Phoebus is the G.o.d of prophecy, why don't you just ask him yourself?”

”I don't want to ask Phoebus or anybody like that,” Zeus said. ”I don't trust them. Surely there are other G.o.ds you ask questions of, not just us Olympians? What about that Jewish fellow who was around when I was?”

”Jehovah has gone through some interesting changes. But he's not available for prophesy. He left strict orders not to be disturbed.”

”There are others, aren't there?”

”There are, of course, but I don't know if it's a good idea to bother them with questions. They're not like you, Zeus, a G.o.d anyone can talk with. They're mean and they're strange.”

”I don't care,” Zeus said. ”Ask them. If a G.o.d can't ask another G.o.d for a little advice, I don't know what the universe is coming to.”