6 Chapter 3 - Pandesal na Maini (2/2)

I gasped again, and I swallowed with difficulty.

Then he walked out; his inconspicous delectable bubble butt passed through the edge of my disoriented vision. I was left mental, lost in translation, confused about life, the world and everything there is. I walked slowly and floatingly to the locker room. It took a little over an hour for me to semi-recover, get myself dressed and leave this wickedly vicious school.

He was worst than porn. At least kapag nanonood ako ng porn, dahan-dahan lang at aware ako sa mga susunod kong mararamdaman. But with him, it was all instant, para akong walang humpay na nilalabasan.

Teacher Kim was like a drug I've never heard before, an extremely dangerous sex drug. His mere existence was illegal enough, but his effect on me has put me in his maximum security prison.

I was handling it well and safe before he became my teacher, when I was just lusting on him from afar. But now, he had caught my lust for him, I was totally busted - in orange jumpsuit, chained and desperately craving for him behind bars.

Mula sa entrance ng main building hanggang sa gate, kadalasan, it only takes me a little over than five minutes to walk, but this time parang napakalayo ng gate. While the university itself is huge, hindi naman kalakihan ang high school campus namin.

Hugis parisukat itong nagiisang open ground na siyang tanging dadaanan mula sa main building patungo sa gate. Habang papalayo ako sa main building na nasa likuran ko na, napatanaw ako sa kaliwa ko kung saan naroon ang cafeteria. My eyes searched for any classmates who might still be around, but I only saw few students wandering, probably thinking about their standard student problems - their lovelife.

Oh, lucky them.

Sa gawing kanan ko naman nakatayo ang Science building. Dito ko unang nakita ang kadakilaan ni Teacher Kim na noo'y pababa ng kaniyang kotse, sariwa, bagong-bagong pantasya ng campus. I was sitting by the steps of the main building's entrance, just as fresh, thirteen, and very very virgin.

I noticed his car was still parked, which means andito pa siya school. Habang napatitig ako sa kotse niya, naglaro sa isipan ko ang napakaraming tanong - why do I feel na gusto niyang pinagnanasaan ko siya? Was he giving some sort of a sign? Does he like me too? Does he wanna fuck me too?

I was so confused. Napaisip ako kung tama ba na may ganitong dilemma ang isang katulad ko. I was drooling over my trending ultimate heartthrob teacher - that was wrong enough; if it was just a crush, I think it's considerable since everyone's crushing on him naman; if I was secretly inlove with him, well, maybe debatable. I've never been in love, but they say mahirap na pigilan kapag tumibok ang puso. But I lusted him, I was only purely lusting on him, isang naghuhumindik na pagnanasa. And yea, it was possibly, definitely a crime.

Bumalik ako sa ulirat ko nang makarating ako sa guard post ni Happy. Naabutan ko siyang nakatayo at nagaabang sa pinto ng post niya. He forced a cough, na para bang may iaanunsyo siya. ”Mahal na Prinsesa,” sambit niya. Tumango ang ulo niya na may kasamang sinserong tuwa at tawa, as if he uttered a very funny line.

”Maaga pumasok, huling umuuwi. Aba Cece! Kailangan na ata kita ipagtayo ng rebulto nyan,” patuloy pa niya na nakangisi. His face was still bright and sunny even in this gloomy late afternoon. I felt, comfort.

”Well, I wouldn't mind Happy. Naipagtayo na nga kita ng monumento eh. Now you owe me my statue,” pagsakay ko sa biro niya.

”Presyur naman yan!” bulyas niya sabay tawa.

Wala talaga siyang tigil sa pagngisi, ang sarap lang niyang tignan,

”Pero teka, bakit parang namumutla ka? Masama ba pakiramdam mo?”

Malalaman mong tunay si Happy at sinsero dahil literal na lalabas sa mukha niya ang tunay niyang nararamdaman.

”Hindi naman, Happy, pagod lang siguro. Friday eh, PE.”

I sat in one of the concrete bollards in front of Happy's guard post. I've always enjoyed being in Happy's presence, he gives me a sense of normalcy. Pakiramdam ko, kapag kausap ko siya, simpleng estudyante lang ako.

”Hmmmm. Iba ngayon eh, parang...” nanliit ang mga mata niya, like he was trying to read me.

”Parang ano?” painosente kong tugon.

”Parang ang daming laman ng isip mo. Gulong-gulo.”

”Nye. Naguguluhan ako sa mga sinasabi mo Happy.”

Dinaan ko na lang sa biro ang puna ni Happy. Sa tagal ko nang kinakaibigan ito si Happy, madalas, alam na niya ang ibig sabihin ng mga expressions ko at kilos ko.

”Alam mo,” medyo nagaalangan pa si Happy sa sasabihin niya. ”Pwede mo sabihin sa'kin. Kung.. makakatulong sa pinagdadaan mo. Pero pwede ring hinde, ayoko ng madrama eh.”

He bursted into a laughter then sipped loudly the last of his slurpee. I had a genuine laugh, pero hindi na ako sumagot.

”Kaninang umaga..” panimula muli ni Happy habang nagmumulti-tasking sa pagbukas ng gate para sa lumabas na sasakyan, patag'sang tingin sa CCTV, at pagsusulat sa log book niya, ”...bumili ako ng pandesal! Mainit na pandesal lang sa umaga masaya na ako e.”

Hindi ko talaga maiiwasang hindi mahawa sa happy face ni Happy, napangiti na lang din ako.

”Dahil takot ako malate, agad ko na lang sinilid sa bag ko yung isang balot ng pandesal! Pagkabigay sa akin ni manong.. Tapos, pagsakay ko ng jeep, kumuha ako ng isa! Pero hindi siya mainit!”

Yung boses niya punong-puno ng ekspresyon, mapapakapit ka na lang kapag nagkekwento siya na parang story of a lifetime yung naririnig mo.

”Kaya, pumara ako sa jeep, agad-agad! Mabuti na lang traffic, hindi pa nakalayo..”

Napaisip na ako ako kung saan papunta ang kwento ni Happy.

”Bumalik ako duuuuun! Sa panaderya! Sabi ko, manong! Gusto ko po ng mainit na pandesal. Hindi naman mainit 'tong binigay niyo eh. Nakakalungkot!”

He paused and belly-laughed.

”Aba! Si manong, binigyan niya nga ako ng mainit na pandesal, bago pa! Pinalitan pa niya yung nakain ko nang pandesal sa jeep. Baet ni manong no? Lagi na talaga ako bibili ng pandesal sa kaniya.”

He seemed very pleased with his story, his face did not deny it. But I was hanging, yun na yun?!

Napansin ata niya na parang nabitin ako, kaya't nagpatuloy pa siya. ”Eh, ayoko kasi ng hindi mainit na pandesal, princess. Sabi nga ng nanay ko, sumalangit nawa.. hindi lahat ng gusto mo makukuha mo. At hindi dahil gusto mo, e, para na sayo. Pero sabi din niya, paano mo malalaman kung para sayo kung hindi mo susubukang mapasayo?”

Ngumisi ulit siya at makulit na nagtaas-baba ang kaniyang mga kilay. Pilit ko namang ikinokonek ang kwento ni Happy sa pinagdadaanan ko, so, medyo napaseryoso ako.

”Eh paano pala, Happy, kung nakarating ka na school? Mamamasahe ka ba ulit pabalik? Tapos male-late ka na? Is it worth the trouble to try and get what you want?”

”Para sa pandesal? hindi no!” sabay hagalpak niya sa tawa.

I was dumbfounded. He wasn't trying to give an unsolicited advice, I realised. He was merely sharing a random story. I wondered if maybe that was my problem, I read too much between the lines, I think too much. Pilit ko nilalagyan ng hidden meaning ang mga bagay-bagay, lalo na pagdating kay Teacher Kim.

”Cece!”

My heart stopped at the sound of that voice and its commanding source.

”It's getting late. You're supposed to be home,” said that voice.

Sa isip-isip ko, I'm a senior, at maliwanag pa nga ang langit! Karamihan sa mga classmates ko either nasa mall o nasa bahay-bahay ng kung sino man. I was still in school, Duh!

I might have, unintentionally, rolled my eyes with my thought. The greek god was not pleased, his expression hardened.

”Teacher Kim!” biglang bati ni Happy nang mapasilip siya sa labas. Nagbigay siya ng isang pabirong saludo na siya naman tinanguan noong gwapong adonis sa loob ng sasakyan.

I felt my face turning crimson when his deep sexy eyes bored into mine. Bigla ko naalala yung nakita ng malaswa kong mga mata. But he looked serious, delicious, but dead serious.

Teacher Kim arched his brows, his lips slightly parted; I realised, he was waiting for my response. Those brows tho, I swear I could see it spelled 'sex'.

”Inaantay ko pa po kuya ko. Hatid-sundo po kasi ako.”

”Are you sure he's coming?”

His brows spelled another meaning - Fuck, as in let's fuck!

”Yes sir. He texted.”

He wet his lips.

Could he just stop doing that???

For what seemed like an eternity, he was just staring at me. I felt I was being penetrated; while his hands cold, floating over my fully erect breasts, just enough distant that I could feel his palms smoking against my skin.

And then just like that, walang abiso, walang pakundangan niyang hinugot ang sarap na aking nararamdaman. He pulled out his gaze, his expression turned deadpan, then he drove off.

No further words. Not even a goodbye, or just a bye. He was cruel, virulent, a monster.