Part 16 (1/2)

_NURSERY RHYME._

What is an Englishman made of?

Roast beef and jam tart, And a pint of good Clar't, And that's what an Englishman's made of.

What is a Frenchman, pray, made of?

Horse steak, and frog fritter, And absinthe so bitter, And that's what a Frenchman is made of.

s.h.i.+RLEY BROOKS, _Wit and Humour_.

Marriage is a desperate thing. The frogs in aesop were extreme wise; they had a great mind to some water, but they would not leap into the well, because they could not get out again.

SELDEN, _Table Talk_.

(”Don't speak so hard of ----; he lives on your good graces.”) That accounts for his being so thin.

LADY ASHBURTON, _apud_ LORD HOUGHTON.

We are wise--and we make ourselves hazy; We are foolish--and so, go to church; While Sambo but laughs, and is lazy (Vile discipline! lend me thy birch); He dreams of no life save the present, His virtue is but when it suits; Sometimes, which is not quite so pleasant, I miss coat or boots.

_Once a Week._

You remember Thurlow's answer to some one complaining of the injustice of a company, ”Why, you never expected justice from a company, did you? They have neither a soul to save, nor a body to kick.”

SYDNEY SMITH, _Life and Letters_.

Elliston, the actor, a self-educated man, was playing cribbage one evening, with Lamb, and on drawing out his first card, exclaimed, ”When Greek meets Greek, then comes the tug of war.” ”Yes,”

replied Lamb, ”and when _you_ meet Greek, you don't understand it.”

_Life of Rev. W Harness._

To Justice Park's brother, who was a great church-goer, some one applied the words, ”_Parcus_ deorum cultor.”

THOMAS MOORE, _Diary_.

”You'll soon get used to her looks,” said he, ”And a very nice girl you'll find her; She may very well pa.s.s for forty-three, In the dusk, with a light behind her!”

_Judge_, in W. S. GILBERT's _Trial by Jury_.

”My brethren,” said Swift in a sermon, ”there are three sorts of pride--of birth, of riches, and of talents. I shall not now speak of the latter, none of you being liable to that abominable vice.”

HORACE SMITH, _The Tin Trumpet_.